Bittersweet Betrayal
by ObessedTWFan
Summary: Chatper 27. Last one till the sequel.
1. What the hell?

A/N: Never done this before, right now Faith and Bosco are together but not for long!

* * *

"You idiot!" being screamed next to him jarred him out of the daydream he was having. He felt the bulge in his pants that kept him from doing his job. Partly the reason was that knowing in a couple of hours he would be home proposing to the love of his life, Faith.

"That idiot cut me off!" his partner said to no one in particular meaning him.

"He probably didn't mean to" he said trying to get her to calm down, not needing her to get any more pissed than she already was. He still hadn't told her that he was leaving a few hours early ndshe would be paired with someone she didn't like-her ex husband, Ramirez.

He could help it, that's the only one available, he'd change the topic and quick.

"So Ash, how was your night?" hoping this topic change would calm her down.

"Great it was filled with lots of sex!" she replied in her normal sarcastic tone. If Cruz and Faith produced a love child she would be it.

She had black hair and it came half way down her back when she let it down, after shift, her hazel eyes daring everyone to piss her off. She had lips that weren't too small and not big either. She was a bitch most of the time but could do a one eighty in an instant if it involved a child. Their were so many similarities in the way she did things was uncanny to both Cruz and Faith.

How long has it been since he saw Cruz… five, six years? Had it really been that long since she had blown herself up to take down Marcel Hollis? It had to be, he'd been with Faith going on three years.

"So when you going to propose to her?" she asked glancing from him to the road and back again.

"Well…" she slammed on the brakes stopping them in the middle of a busy street.

"Oh no, you are not, no I wont allow it"

"you must of liked him or you wouldn't have married him"

"Why the hell do you think he's my ex husband, hmm…?"

"He did have his moments though didn't he?"

"Few and far between" Angry drivers started honking their horns both ignoring them.

"Can we have this discussion we'll we're not parked in the middle of the street?"

"NO!"

"Okay then" "It's only for a couple of hours" this was definitely not good. He could feel her anger escalating.

"REMEMBER the last time we were together? What happened then?"

He did all too well, he was the one holding her back from him. Her ex left with a bloody nose and cut lip. She did have one hell of a punch. She was a damn good cop too, letting nothing get by her.

"Your still on probation, so you wont do anything" her husband had filed charges against her for assault afterwards, he dropped them three days later when he got a surprise visit from him and a couple other on the same watch.

The horns finally ticking her off, she continued driving once again.

"You owe me big" anger oozed from her.

"I know" he'd would make it up to her one way or another. She was like a little sister to him.

"Bigger than big"

"I'm aware of that"

"Good, cause I'm not going to let you forget it"

Glad she had a weakness for him, like he did for her, he'd do anything for her.

After a quick lunch in which he bought they were on the road again, this time he was driving, he was on his way back to the precinct although he didn't tell her that.

"When are you leaving?"

"Now" she didn't say anything but he could tell she was becoming more angry if that was possible.

She remained calm but kept breathing in and out letting him know how pissed she was.

He pulled into their familiar parking space and shut off the car, she got out without speaking to him. He'd have her in a happier mood by the time he left.

He quickly changed knowing he didn't have much time before Faith got home and he wanted it to be special.

Ashley was talking to the desk Sgt when he came down, Ramirez no where in sight, the bastard was no where to be seen, good thing even if she was on probation she'd go after him, he didn't know the details of why they spilt but that would come with time. He kissed her on the cheek on his way out

"Thanks again Ash" and left.

He had trouble opening the door, his hands being so full, it didn't think it really would be expensive but what the hell she was worth it. A thump coming from the bedroom, alerted him that someone was in the apartment.

* * *

Maritza Cruz walked into the 79th precinct, in ways it reminded her of the 55th in some ways. It was good to be back, working, the city everything. She'd been in hiding for the last five years, finally happy that she didn't have to constantly look over her shoulder. She took a deep breath and made her way over to what she guessed was the desk Sgt, when a black haired women in uniform came rushing past her almost knocking her down.

"Boss I don't care, I refuse to work with him, I'm going home"

She wondered who she wouldn't work with, she could use someone like her in the Anti-Crime unit, she'd have to talk to the Lt to see if it was possible. She didn't have to wait long before a incredibly handsome guy came through the door, with a black eye. Good puncher too, hmm that talk moved up to the top of her list.

* * *

Bosco drew his backup piece and made his way to the bedroom, he pushed open the half opened door, to find Faith riding Miller like a horse, both naked.

"What the hell?"


	2. Someone From The Past

He stared at them in shock, his heart dropping to the ground below him. How many times had she told him she would never cheat because she never wanted to be like Fred? And yet here she was having sex with her boss? What the hell?

Faith eyed the gun not knowing if he possessed the power to use it or not. He put it back into his ankle holster and she let out of breath of relief.

"It's not what it looks like"

"What does it not look like? You fucking him? That's exactly what it looks like!"

He needed air now, he turned around hearing sounds that indicated she was following him, he bent over and started searching through the bags looking for the champagne and glasses he recently bought, he needed a drink.

He sat the bottle and glasses on the counter as he moved to the liquor cabinet above the sink, he didn't bother with a glass, he took it straight from a bottle. He was silent for a moment until he asked in an almost whisper

"Why?" He couldn't look at her and his eyes remained on the floor between them. Why would she do this? After all they've been through why now?

"I don't know, it just sort of happened"

"How long has it been going on?"

She didn't say anything, that told him it had happened more than once and she didn't regret it either.

"Why would you do it? In our bed of all the fucking places to do it! I sleep in that god damn bed for Christ sakes!"

"Bos please"

"Don't you mean Miller please?"

"That's not fair"

"You don't get fair" "You don't deserve it"

He wasn't angry and that made him angry, this was the girl he had decided to spend the rest of his life with and he wasn't angry that she had, had an affair with someone.

He took another swig, the liquid burning as it went down.

Noises could be heard from the bedroom and seconds later Miller appeared. He didn't know if he wanted to kill the man or shake the man's hand and congratulate him.

He placed the lid back on the bottle and placed it in its place above the sink. If she loved him why wasn't she fighting that he listen to her? Can anyone tell him that?

Maybe this was some dream and any second now he would wake up and everything would be back to normal, he would have come home, set everything up and then propose with her saying yes, that wasn't going to happen, not ever. This wasn't a dream.

"Bosco, I love you so much please let's work this out"

"You know the thing that gets me the most is that you say you love me and yet you have said maybe two sentences on your own, I've had to ask you the rest. If you did love me, you'd be fighting me to listen to you" He put the champagne and glasses back in the bag and picked them up.

He knew he'd hit home when she didn't say anything back. He looked at her and started walking towards the door, he stopped only long enough to look back at her and said

"And I was stupid enough to want to spend the rest of my life with you"

The door slammed behind him as he left.

* * *

He raised the glass to his lips the liquid no longer burning like it once did hours ago. This was a time where he just needed to get drunk. Forget his problems at least for a little while.

He liked this bar, the music, you could understand, it wasn't loud but it wasn't low enough that you could hear everyone's conversation, he'd been sitting on the bar stool for god only knows how long and this was his umpteenth drink, he'd lost count after the first two.

The bar was nearly empty now, not like a few hours ago when you could barely move, your personal space being invaded. This was how he liked it, but for some reason not tonight, it left him alone with his thoughts and right now that wasn't a good idea.

"It's closing time" he glanced up to see Stan the bartender, wiping a glass with a rag, a cliché almost in so many movies bartenders did that standing in front of him.

"One more?" He downed the last of it and placed it on the table the hard sound of it hitting the bar was the only noise between them. He was done Stan wouldn't give him another.

The door to the bar opened sending in a gush of cool air that wrapped itself around him as he saw who came in and swore under his breath.

"Stan why the hell did you call her?"

"Cause you asked me too an hour ago" He didn't remember that

"C'mon Bosco time to get you home" his partner replied, seeing her hair in a ponytail was a first for him she always wore it in a messy bun, when the wind blew it would send small pieces of hair into her face and the sun shining down on her made her look like an angel. A Devil Angel.

"Ashley good to see you" he stood up grabbing his coat and stumbled against the bar grabbing onto the bar for support but ending up falling on his butt instead.

She extended her hand to help him up and he took it, he had to reply on her doing most of the work cause his feet wouldn't work quite right. He leaned heavily on her as they were making it to the exit as he passed out on her. She almost went down but luckily another pair hands help her steady him.

Ashley looked up to see who had helped her, a woman maybe closer to Bosco's age then her own, she was often teased about her age but that didn't matter when you were on the streets it was the experience you had.

"Thanks, he weighs a ton"

"No problem"

The woman helped Ashley get him to her car they talked along the way.

"Is he your boyfriend?"

"This idiot oh no just my partner" "we work together at the 79th precinct"

Ashley buckled him in the seat and stood back up, the woman waiting for her.

"I'm Ashley by the way"

"Maritza" they shake hands

"Well I better get back in there, Stan'll need me to help close"

"Sorry to keep you"

"It's no problem" With that she left.

Ashley was driving along the way to Bosco and Faith apartment when he finally came to.

"Where are you taking me?"

"To your apartment, you know the one you share with Faith"

"NO, not there" "I refuse to go back there"

"Why Bosco?"

"Just Cause" he passed out again, she turned and made the way to her apartment knowing she would weasel the whole story out of him in the morning.

* * *

He slowly opened his eyes sunlight blinding him, the light hurting his head, he looked around with slinted eyes and didn't know where the hell he was, he did know that he needed to throw up. He tried fighting with the nausea but couldn't win he leaned over the bed and emptied his stomach; he'd opened his eyes to find his stomach contents went into a bucket beside the bed.

"Morning Sleepyhead" Ashley said rather loudly as she walked into the bedroom, carrying a bottle of aspirin and glass of water. Her voice making his head throb more than it already was. He glared at her, she handed him the bottle and water and left. He downed four aspirin and half the water, the recommended two weren't going to help this hang over.

The effects of yesterday came rushing back to him forcing him to close his eyes in pain. He could remember everything up until shortly after he entered the bar and had a few drinks, the rest of it hazy and fuzzy, he just hoped he didn't do anything stupid like jeopardize the friendship he had going with Ashley, which brought him to the question of why he was here in the first place, he didn't, they didn't, no he still had his clothes on.

He made his way out of her bedroom into her living room and could see her in the kitchen cooking something, the smells making him nauseous. He had to find out why how he ended up here and soon.

* * *

He sat with his head against the window of the RMP with his eyes closed, praying for the shift to be over, the dull throbbing pain still hadn't gone away. Partly from the hangover and a dull numbing effect had taken over his body he guessed from the betrayal he experienced yesterday. He wasn't ready to face her, the pain still too real.

His attempts to get anything out of Ashley had failed miserably, not only would she not tell him what happened last night and how he ended up at her place, she also hinted that something had happened between them. He wished she was joking; he didn't need the complication of that too, to deal with. She had been nice about it this morning ducking calls that would require a lot of thought involved, and taking the really easy calls that resulted in a arrest in which she took care of the paper work, or just a ticket. They had just ducked a robbery call, which he was thankful for, that would have been a hour wasted listening to some person swear they had locked the door or window but really hadn't. She did have a mean side today too, for no reason she would talk loud or make unnecessary noise making his head throb harder.

"How did it go with Ramirez go yesterday?" The atmosphere in the car changed dramatically.

"I got about an hour with him before I ended up giving him a black eye"

"Your making progress, the last time it was forty-five minutes"

"I KNOW" oww his head, he did deserve it, he should have done the remainder of the shift and then gone to get the stuff, maybe then he wouldn't have caught her in the act but it was all for the better. He'd rather find out now, then couple months down the road when it had been going on longer and they were engaged. She saw him wince when she had replied; she'd give him what he needed to know.

"Stan says that you were sitting in the bar for about four hours, drinking the time away, he made you eat, he said that you told him to call me, I came helped you off your ass after you fell, and the thanks I get for that is you pass out on me! Some waitress named Maritza helped me with you and then she left, you came too, told me you didn't want to go home so I took you to my place. You were out before your head touched the pillow"

Maritza, he knew one person by that name and she was dead. It had to be someone else; there were how many people in New York City? There had to be hundreds maybe even thousands named Maritza.

"You didn't get a last name?"

"Knowing her last name wasn't high priority, sorry"

"What she'd look like?"

"Why the sudden interest in her?"

"I just knew someone named Maritza, just wondered if it was her"

"She was a bit shorter than me, I'd say Spanish, Puerto Rican, black hair, big lips and very petite"

She had just described the Maritza he knew down to a T. No she was dead. He watched the place blow up, with her in it. Maritza was a Spanish name, there would be others who matched the description it was just a fluke.

It just had to be.


	3. Voices From Beyond

Finally shift was over, he could go home, wait he didn't have a home, not after last night. He needed to go over there and grab his stuff, but then what, where would he go? Ma's place? No he didn't want her to get involved in this, not yet. He didn't even know where this was going.

He wasn't sure if he wanted to work it out with Faith or not, cheating went against everything he believed in. What was the saying? 'Once a cheater always a cheater' How did he know she wouldn't do it again? He didn't.

He blamed himself, just when he opened up, allowed someone in to see the real him, they go behind his back and betray him. He was never getting close to another person again, the only exception was Ashley because she was already in and he learned from being with her that she would never intentionally hurt him. He just wouldn't let her in any further than she already was. That would be easy enough, right? Easier said than done.

He closed his locker with a little more force than necessary but no one seemed to notice, everyone oblivious to how much pain he was in.

Faith came in; she was only here when a case brought her here. She waited for him to face her; he could feel her eyes poring into his back. Might as well get this over with, she wouldn't cause a scene while they were at work. He slowly turned and faced her, seeing right through her.

"Can we talk?"

"Go ahead." she shifted her weight from one foot to the other

"Alone?"

"No, say what ever you have to say here" the locker room was empty now except for Ashley, he knew that causethey always walked out together. She however wasn't making her self-known to Faith. Maybe that was best.

"I swear Bosco that won't happen again, you have to believe me. I –no there is no excuse for what I did. You mean everything to me, please tell me what I can do to make it up to you"

He gave her the once over, not believing any of the words she had just uttered. If he was everything to her, she wouldn't have cheated.

"I need to grab a few things from the apartment, I'd appreciate it if you weren't there" She nodded her head and looked away, she had began to cry, it pained him to see this but she brought it on herself.

"I swear to you nothing is going on with me and Miller anymore I broke it off"

"Why don't I believe you?" his voice bitter

"Please, you have to! He meant nothing to me."

"Then why fuck him?"

"We were given a case that was about children who were forced to perform sexual acts, and then murdered, they were no more than seven, you were working and he was there"

"So a good fuck for every child case that you have compassion for?"

"Please Bos don't make me do this"

"Do what?" "You're the one who wanted to talk not me"

Ashley finally made her presence known as she shut her locker, causing Faith to glance in the direction the sound had come from.

"Found someone new already?"

"No, I'm not like you, this is my partner. Now we are going to leave and get drunk"

"Bosco I don't think-" he cut her off, not giving her time to say no.

"Are you coming?" she wanted to be there for him, but getting drunk with him wasn't the way.

"Ya" they walked out together only to be stopped just before they reach the door. The desk Sgt hung up the phone he was talking into and hollered.

"Hey Ryans, the Anti-Crime Sgt wants to see you, Now" they look at each other in confusion.

"Okay, wait for me?"

"I'm not going anywhere" she made her way up to the Anti-Crime Unit, knocking on the door before entering. A woman sat at a desk writing.

"Can I help you?" she asked, not looking up

"I was told to come up here the Sgt wants to speak to me"

"Ryans?"

"Yes"

The woman finishes writing and looks up, the woman from the bar last night.

"Maritza Cruz, Sgt of Anti-Crime unit" "Last night you saw me undercover over that the Lucky Stallion"

"Why?"

"Stan Parks is running drugs through his business"

"Oh"

"What does this have to do with me?"

"Well I saw what you did to Ramirez yesterday, I would like you on my team"

"As in work in Anti-Crime?"

"Yes"

She didn't know what to say, that was her goal from the beginning to get into Anti-Crime, now that it was within her grasp she didn't know if she wanted it.

"Could I have some time to think it over?"

"Of course, I expect an answer by tomorrow morning"

"Yes ma'am"

"Good, you can leave"

She didn't waste anytime in leaving she almost bolted past Bosco, if he hadn't grabbed her she wouldn't have remembered him.

"Hey what's wrong?"

"Nothing, everything's great, seriously"

"Then what he want?"

"Who's he?"

"The Anti-Crime Sgt"

"Oh she asked me if I wanted on, to be a part of her team"

"That's great what did you say?"

"I have the night to think about it"

"You should take it"

"You want me to see if I can get you in too don't you?" She stated matter of factly.

"Couldn't hurt"

"I'll ask tomorrow morning when I give her my answer" "You wanna know what the funny thing is? She's the same woman who helped me get you to my car, Maritza Cruz"

He couldn't help but laugh as he walked out the door, and a voice that sent ice running through his veins. A voice he thought he'd never hear again. A voice from the dead.

"It's good to see you Officer Boscorelli"


	4. Remembering The Past

He turned around and looked at the person who had spoken to him, he smiled smugly.

"Likewise Ritza"

"You two know each other?" Ashley stared at them both in shock. Then she remembered, they'd worked together at the 55th, she had blown herself up to take down a drug/gang leader, she was supposed to be dead. She read it in the paper.

"You could say that" Cruz drawled out nice and slow

"We have…history" "and unfinished business" he wanted to know why the hell she would kiss him and then go and "blow" herself up, not a letter, phone call or email explaining, telling him she was alive.

"But we were just leaving C'mon Ash" if Ashley knew what's best for her she would say thanks but no thanks, she'd think he was on crack if he asked her to say no. He would have to tell her the history between them and that's something he didn't want to relive any time soon.

"Wow" Ashley sat in her car just having listened to Bosco explain why she shouldn't go to Anti-Crime, not when Maritza Cruz was the head of it. She didn't know what to say, it seemed unreal, but yet so entertaining, so thrilling. That only made her decision harder. Maybe it would be different this time, she knew what was crossing the line and not, but the line was narrow and thin.

What defined the line? And what defined crossing it?

She sensed that they had unfinished business they needed to talk about, and she was going to be the one who gave them that time, she just had to think of a way how. It would come to her eventually. Always did.

"So what was her reason for being at Stan's last night?" She would have to tell him so he didn't make a scene.

"She's working undercover"

"In Stan's bar, why?"

"She said that Stan is running a drugs, his bar a cover"

"I really believe that one" his tone saying that he really didn't.

"How long have you known her?"

"What does this have to do with anything?"

"Just answer the question"

"I don't know maybe seven years"

"In that time how many times has she been wrong?"

She had him there, she had never been wrong, except when it came to Mikey and Dade, it was Mikey's car but it wasn't him driving. Hell he would have thought that too, if it hadn't been Mikey. So that really didn't count. Dammit, Stan! Of all people why the hell him? How many times had he sat there in the bar, sharing his stories with Stan about his cases that he worked on and he was just let him listen. How could he have been so stupid?

"You don't need to beat yourself up about it"

"I could have told him things that no body was supposed to know!"

"Your not like that"

"How do you know that?"

"Because whether or not you like it, I do know you" It was true.

"Now if I say yes will you be there backing me up?" How could she ask him something like that, of course he would.

He nodded

It was good to know

"Then it's decided, either you come with me or I say no thanks"

"Put 'err there pardner" she said in her best southern accent and extended her hand.

"Sure thing kiddo" he replied in the same southern tone, and shook her hand.

"Come on your buying" she got out of the car, him following.

"Do I have to buy your every meal?"

"For now you do" and walked into the diner.

"Alright, now that you know my problems, time for you to spill yours"

"Ya..No" she began digging into her food avoiding him, she was stubborn, maybe even more than him.

"Do I have to ask Ramirez?"

"You wouldn't" she looked at him, anger flaring in her eyes

"Try me" he took a fry and dug it in her ketchup and to his mouth, smiling.

She wanted to tell him, she really did but everyone in her life that she though cared for her ended up hurting her, she didn't want to let him in and have him hurt her. She'd been foolish enough to allow that with David and look where that ended up.

"Not here, its not something you say in a roomful of people" he nodded his understanding, he wondered if once that she told him, her life story that he would too. He didn't know if he could do that.

They finished eating in silence, him again paying for the cheque and soon they were on their way, she pulled to a stop at a red light.

"Umm could you take me to my place, I need some clothes"

"Ok and then where?"

"Where ever you want to go to talk about your problems" her shoulders sunk, she thought he'd forgotten about that

"Where are you staying?"

"With you"

"Thanks for asking, you know I would love my if you stay with me" he detected sarcasm in her voice.

"See I know you wouldn't mind"

The light turned green and she made her way to his apartment.

He unlocked the door and walked into a darkened apartment, maybe she was staying at her mother's or Emily's, he was grateful that she wasn't here.

He quickly grabbed what he could stuff into his duffel bag and came back out, she hadn't moved from spot he'd left her.

Her arms tucked around her middle protecting from what he didn't know.

"Alright I'm ready"

"Do you want to follow me so you have your car?"

"Ya ok"

They were about to leave when the rustling of keys in a lock diverted their attention. Faith walked in, so many emotions on her face but most apparent was sadness and relief.

"Hello Ashley"

"Faith"

"Bos, I'm really glad that you came back, I love you so much and now we can work things out"

She rushed over to him and pulled him into a kiss, Ashley became very uncomfortable very fast. He pulled away from her as quickly as it started

"No Faith that's not why I came here"

"I'm going to go, I'll see you later Bosco, Faith" she bolted to the door, not wasting a second to get out of there. She didn't do well in those kinds of situations; her own husband had called her the ice queen.

She had her mother to thank for that, never having a gentleman friend for more than two weeks, always ditching them for bigger and better, meaning more sleazy. It wasn't any better when her father was alive, he was just like them. She had always known that her father did drugs, he tried so hard to keep them from him, but she knew, everyone on the damn block knew. Look out when he was high, if you get caught your in for one hell of a beating. The day she turned sixteen she finally realized that he needed help and told him, that she loved him but he needed help, he had a problem. His answer was beating her to an inch of her life and claimed that she fell down the stairs on her own. Social services never did anything they always send some guy fresh out of college who was easily manipulated by her mother and they always had glowing reports.

Her mother did nothing when she told her that she saw dad raping Rachael, she just laughed and had another drink. So one night when he came home she was waiting for him, with his gun that had mysteriously appeared a few weeks ago. She hid but it was within reach as he tried to rape her, he never did though because a bullet stopped him in his chest.

Nothing like a good night of pitying yourself was there? She didn't do it often and kept quite when others were telling stories of their childhood, she did a couple of memories of her grandmother when she was allowed to visit and that she would keep inside of her for all time.

She looked at the clock in her kitchen, ten after nine. Hmm he'd been gone over four hours. She guessed that was good, that meant they were talking and quite possibly they could get back together. Which she wasn't too keen on, there was something about her that just rubbed her the wrong way. She knew Faith was a good person, even better detective but she just didn't see her and Bosco having a future. Which lead her to think about ways she could get Cruz and Bosco together it would have to be something subtle, nothing too obvious, hmm she needed them together but how? She thought of ways for a few minutes but nothing seemed to stick. She was in a middle of thought when her door knocked, well someone knocked on her door.

She opened the door to a person looking like shit, his face looked like they had extra worry lines etched into his forehead, maybe he been doing a lot of thinking, Ha Bosco thinking now that's a first. Now was the time for jokes. She told the truth.

"You look like shit" she told him as she moved away so he could get in, it seemed he'd packed more stuff. She didn't know what else to say, her friend's well people she knew didn't include her in things like this and she didn't either.

"She's pregnant" that definitely made things better. Not.

"But its not mine" that was a sucker punch to the solar plexus.

"Are you happy or disappointed?" why the hell would she ask that? That was none of her business and she regretted asking it but he answered.

"You certainly have a way to get to the point" he put his bag down near the couch and sat down stretching out and his head leaning against the back of the couch, his eyes closed.

"Life's too short not to" she had a point there

"I don't know, at first I felt disappointed, but then as she kept talking it changed to relief. Her two other kids didn't get to see much of her when they were growing up"

"You think this time will be different?" she sat in the oversized chair beside him.

"I don't know but I don't have to worry about that it's not mine" he leaned over to his bag, looking for something and produce a bottle of champagne with two glasses.

"This calls for a celebration" he very carefully popped the cork off with just a pop. He poured her a glass then his; he set the bottle down on the table between them and took his from her.

"To not being the father!" she didn't like him like this it kind of scared her; he just threw a relationship away without a second glance. She watched him over the rim of her champagne flute as she drank, his face change as quick the seconds ticked away the time.

He looked at her as if he was expecting something, right the damn talk they had to have.

"There's nothing to tell" he gave her a look that told her he didn't believe that.

"Honestly" he expression didn't change

"Ok you wanna know, my life? My past ok"

"My father was a druggie who liked to rape my sister, he beat within an inch of my life on my sixteenth birthday cause I asked him to get help, social services did nothing, my father tried to rape me one night so I shot him with his own gun"

"Then I spent six months in the loony bin because my mother thought I was out of control and needed help, she put the best show I'd ever seen her do crying wondering where she went wrong in front of the judge, the next day she came to visit me, she told me she never wanted to see me again"

"Then when I got out, it was like she was completely different, she had a new guy every week, more sleazier than last"

"Then just went I think I've found a guy that doesn't care about my past he uses that to try to get me committed again so that he gets the money that my grandmother left me. And my mother was in on it too"

"There now you know my life story, don't pity me, feel sorry for me, nothing"

He didn't expect he to tell him, but she did and he was glad, that she had chosen him to confide in. He wondered how a guy could do something like that to her, sure she had her moments when he wanted to shoot her but she didn't deserve that.

"Thank you"

"For what?"

"Telling me"

"Ya well you got annoying" she looked away hiding the truth, that she was glad she had told him. She moved off the chair and into her kitchen, he heard her tinkering around there and wondered what she was doing.

She was drinking she had the bottle and glass in front of her, her arms bracing her against the counter, thinking he supposed.

"The funny thing is my sister is married and has two kids"

She shot back more amber liquid.

"My childhood wasn't any better"

He wasn't the one to be comforting her; he'd never had anyone comfort him before. The last time he tried to comfort someone they ended up sleeping together that was a whole other road that didn't need to be take again. He could hug her what was the worst that could happen?

He pulled her into his arms and just held her; he felt tears seep through his shirt. She pulled away suddenly walking away from him wiping her tears in secret.

"Enough of me, what happened once I left?"

"I don't want to talk about it" he moved back to the living room

"That's not going to work with me mister, I told you"

"Fair enough, but first I wanna do something"

"What exactly?" her eyebrows drew together, her eyes followed him as he got up again and stood in front of her

"This" he said as his lips came crashing down on hers.

A/N: I did say eventually did i not?


	5. Someone To Be There

A/N: This will be a Cruz/Bosco fic, just not yet have to tie up some things first, meaning I have to think how I want them to get together, and him and Ashley is a one time deal. Two people who just happened to be there, and both suck at comforting people, so they did the next best thing. This chapter is again Ashley based because the next few chaps are going to be involving Bos and Cruz, with a very little Ashley thrown in.Okay more than a little cause she is arranging them getting together but i promise one full chapter with nothing but Bosco/Cruz in it, maybe even a little sex who knows.

Shock was an understatement to what she was feeling but she couldn't help herself kissing back. She sometimes wondered what it would be like to kiss him but never acted on it because she didn't want to break up the good thing they had going on.

She didn't like him like that, never did sure he was gorgeous as hell but that did nothing for her.

His mouth angled over hers again this time deepening as his hands came around to her back traveling up and down. She couldn't help it when her arms slowly made their way up to his shoulders then his enclosed around his neck and angled her head to further deepen the kiss. No this was wrong. She pulled away trying to catch her breath, walking away from him.

"What hell just happened?" her fingers coming up to mouth still swollen from his kiss

"I think we just kissed" wondering why the hell he just did that.

"I'd say"

"It was nice" no he wasn't supposed to say that

"It was but I don't want it to ruin what we have going"

"I know what you mean" she couldn't help but notice that he was moving towards her again and she wasn't stepping back either.

"So we should never do that again"

"Oh I wouldn't say never" he pulled her back into his embrace

"I'm saying never"

"That's a horrible" his face inches from hers

"No its not"

"Oh yes it is" his breath fanning her face and neck, she tried to swallow the sudden lump in her throat.

"We shouldn't"

"Mmhmm" he kissed her, slowly and thoroughly leaving none of her mouth unexplored.

She still knew that she should stop him but she couldn't and every thought slipped from her head as he picked her up and carried her to the bedroom.

As surprisingly enough nothing changed between them, they were still as close as ever and could finally put that what if behind them. They were transferred to Anti-Crime the next day, the tension was so thick between him and Cruz you could cut through it with a knife. She tried her best to keep them apart, to keep the tension up so when they did talk, they would be less mad at her and more at each other, cause she knew she couldn't get them together being behind the scenes. It maybe was time to call in reinforcements, her mind went through a mental list of who she could ask. The only people they both interacted with was herself and Stan. But how would she explain it to Stan how they met, he knew they were cops, but he didn't know his new waitress was. Hmm more thinking was to be had on her part.

He seemed distant today as they sat in an unmarked waiting for of theirs to make a sell, it'd been a slow morning and something was eating him up inside.

"Penny for your thoughts" maybe if she scared him with niceness he'd give her the answer, only realizing after he had said it.

"Just thinking" okay something was definitely up when he only answered with one or two word answers.

"About?"

"Things" she'd had enough of this

"Either you tell me what the hell your thinking about or we sit here until you do, your choice"

"I'm also warning you that I will get cranky when I don't have food in me, so c'mon tell me"

"I think I'm still in love with her" she didn't expect that

"Who Faith?"

"No" ohh, this meant her plan might actually work and he might not be mad at her after all once this whole thing went down.

The radio balking to life on the dashboard stopped her from thinking. The woman they were just talking about spoke

"We got one" She started the car and he put the cherry in place nabbing the guy.

Ashley was changing grateful their shift finally over all she wanted to do was go home and soak in a nice hot bubble bath, but that would have to wait she had too many things to do. And Bosco liked to hog the bathroom on more than one occasion he'd come out smelling like her bubble bath. She was curious to see what he would say if she let it slip in front of the men in here. She smiled black mail was definitely sweet, maybe she could use it to get him to start cleaning up after himself, and for once leave the god damn toilet seat down.

She shut her locker and turned to leave only to run into a solid wall of chest. She looked up to see who was in her way. His black eye had healed nicely, she'd have to hit harder next time, there would be a next time, he liked getting on her nerves.

"You look nice today Ash," whoa what the hell was he on

"Thanks you don't look so bad yourself"

"You doing anything later?" the world was seriously coming to an end, if he'd just asked her out

"Ya"

"That's a shame, I thought we could go grab something to eat"

"What's up?" she crossed her arms across her chest looking at him with annoyance.

"Nothing, just thought it was silly for us to be fighting all the time"

"You should have thought that before you tried to have me committed" she picked up her bag off the bench beside them, he blocked her exit purposely. This was becoming lame real fast.

"I agree, that's not what you do to a person you love" ha he loved her, she'd believe that when hell froze over.

"Ahh so you call that love not trying to get money?"

"That was foolish on my part, I truly am sorry" what was his deal? Why be so nice all of sudden, he wasn't like this

"You need money" pissed off that, that's all she was to him.

"Only a couple of grand, I made some bad decisions"

"I don't believe this" she shook her head ready to push or deck him if he didn't let her leave.

"Get out of my way" he didn't budge, she sat her bag down, positioning herself so she could hit him.

"Since when did you become like this?" he knew he was pushing it, her eyes looking at him with a murderous rage. He did love her, he needed the money then, if not they were going to kill him, so he staged a few things to make it look like she was crazy even fed her hallucinogens, that was wrong of him, if she did that to him, he wouldnt be talking to her, he had respect for her on so many levels. He wanted her back but she would never go back to him, he knew that. If she couldn't love him, he at least wanted to be her friend, like Boscorelli was, if she'd let him.

"You bring it out in me, now get the fuck out of my way" he had lost, his excuse about needing money failed, she didn't want anything to do with him and he couldn't blame her. He stepped back allowing her to pass.

Her of all people he would come to ask for money, what an asshole. How could he think that she would give him the money? Did she have a sign on her forehead that read 'it's ok I liked to be used?' Well she refused to be that way anymore. She went down the stairs trying to fool proof her plan of getting them together. Why the hell was Bosco anyways he'd taken off right after shift, no doubt to Stan's knowing full well who worked there.

A voice she didn't want to hear anytime soon stopped her. A little louder than needed.

"Your sleeping with him aren't you?" she finished her descent down the stairs, knowing that he followed her down, she turned to face him.

"Who?" she had a guess who but she wanted to see what he would say

"BOSCO YOUR SLEEPING WITH HIM AREN'T YOU?" She saw Faith coming down the stairs on one side and Bosco on the other set across from them. She looked him right in his eye

"No, I don't get involved with my partners unlike some people" she glanced at Faith before walking out the door into the frigid night.

_Seems like just yesterday  
__You were a part of me  
__I used to stand so tall  
__I used to be so strong  
__Your arms around me tight  
__Everything, it felt so right  
__Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong  
__Now I can't breathe  
__No, I can't sleep  
__I'm barely hanging on_

She heard footsteps behind her, dreading to know who it was, she didn't want to talk to anyone, see anyone or listen to anyone, she had to talk to Stan before she forgot.

"Would you like to talk?" some guy she'd never seen before started walking beside her.

"No" she continued walking, trying to get the guy to get the hint and leave her alone.

"It's not good to keep those problems in that pretty little head of yours"

"Never had a problem before" what was this guys problem? Was he plain stupid or ignoring her hints

"I wanna help" she stopped and faced him, she had to admit, he was good looking probably freezing because he was only wearing a t-shirt.

"You really wanna help?" He nodded "Then leave me alone" she started walking again this time he wasn't following her.

"One day your going to need my help"

She laughed as she continued, a tear slipping down her cheek.

_Here I am, once again  
__I'm torn into pieces  
__Can't deny it, can't pretend  
__Just thought you were the one  
__Broken up, deep inside  
__But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
__Behind these hazel eyes_

She didn't feel like talking to Stan right now, so she went for a little drive and ended up at a park looking into the ocean below her, no one was around her, the moon barely creating light. Why did she have to have all the problems?

_I told you everything_  
_Opened up and let you in  
__You made me feel alright  
__For once in my life  
__Now all that's left of me  
__Is what I pretend to be  
__So together, but so broken up inside  
__Case I can't breathe  
__No, I cant sleep  
__I'm barely hangin' on_

Maybe that guy was right, keeping all her problems inside wasn't a good idea, she could feel them taking their toll on her, teasing her, wanting her to crack. Sometimes she just wanted to scream, kick, punch, throw things most of the time she did. It helped somewhat but only to a certain extent. They couldn't take away the pain she felt sometimes. Not even alcohol did that anymore, that's why she stopped drinking.

She didn't want to be alone anymore but who was she to be with? Bosco? No he was in love with Cruz, she was happy for him, finding his one and only. What about David? No that road had already been taken, and she didn't want to go there again.

_Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one_  
_Broken up, deep inside  
__But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
__Behind these hazel eyes_

Ugh! Men! People! There should be a limit of how stupid you could be. She'd certain be over the limit, letting people use her for their own personal gain, because she didn't know any better. Why did this have to be so complicated?

_Swallow me then, spit me out  
__For hating you, I blame myself  
__Seeing you kills me now  
__No I don't cry on the outside anymore  
__Anymore…_

She was done feeling sorry for herself.

"Looks like you could use a friend" the guy who accused her of needing his help walked up beside her places his arms on the fence overlooking the water.

"I don't need any friends" glad that he couldn't see her face, she didn't want him to see her cry

"Everyone needs friends"

"Not me"

"Even you"

"And by being my friend this isn't some way to get into my pants?" every guy was the same always looking for a good lay.

"Very small, you are quite attractive but I will refrain myself until your ready"

"Your full of self"

"Quite Possibly My eyes are brown, now what's got you so worked up?"

"Things, people, everything" he dug into his pocket and produced a small round shape. He took her hand and placed the object in her hand closing her fingers around it.

"A penny for your thoughts" she opened her hand to see a battered penny in her outstretched palm. She smiled, no one had ever done something so corny for her before.

"Well to help my problem, you'll have to know my life history"

"I've got all night" and so she began telling her history, she didn't think it would be easy for her to tell a complete stranger her problems but then he wouldn't judge her like people she worked with would. He listened to her and added in reassuring comments when he felt she needed them, she learned a little about him, when it was hard for her to talk about it, she'd even told him about her grandmother which surprised cause she hadn't even told Bosco about that.

She opened her door, at the crack of dawn, hoping to get at least an hours sleep before she had to go to work, her hopes were gone when she opened the door to a pacing Bosco looking worried, his face didn't change as he looked at her.

"Where the hell have you been? I was worried sick" this was something new for her, she never had anyone waiting up for her to make sure she got home alright.

"That is none of your business, Bubble Man" she walked past him into her bedroom, stripping off her clothes as she went, she wasn't ashamed Bosco had seen it before. He followed her into her bedroom so she stopped stripping when she got to her bra and panties. Climbing into bed she ignored everything that he was saying and closed her eyes.

For the first time in a long time she was happy.

A/N: so what do you think? Song credits go to Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson.


	6. The Plan Is Set

A/N: I hope everyone got who the song was for, it was about her ex husband.

Her happiness was short lived however, 45 minutes later she was hit with a pillow in the head.

"Ash, Get Up!" five more minutes, she didn't have five more minutes she had to get up. She rolled over and threw the covers off her, to be meet with an empty room, one guess where he went, she walked over to the bathroom and her guess was right. She didn't want to wait this morning.

"Get out of my god damn bathroom, or I tell everyone you use my bubble bath" he was out in ten seconds flat.

He wasn't going to provoke her today, he knew better, because he was afraid that she really would kill him. Some days when the shift was going slow he would taunt and provoke her so she would yell at him and get mad, but that never lasted long and he was always thinking of the next thing that would piss her off. He had a habit of pissing people off, maybe it was him, no people just had a lower tolerance level these days.

He was still pissed at what Cruz did to him, and she still hadn't talked to him, making him angrier still but that didn't stop him from stealing glances at her during shift, when they were writing reports or the end of shift when she was changing or just in general, he was more than ever in love with and yet he hated her. If that was possible.

He hated how she made him feel with just a quick glance that caused him to take a sharp intake of breath, made his palms sweat and his heart race. So much unfinished business, and yet no time to talk about it.

He had been going over to Stan's every night since he learned she was working there undercover, never talking to her just looking at her, breathing in her scent as she stood beside him waiting for Stan to fill her order and then she was off again, her scent lingering. He knew Ashley knew and was pleased she hadn't brought it up either. He still didn't know how he felt about her himself and a person asking wasn't going to help until he had his feeling sorted out.

The silence in the car was killing him, he was never quiet always talking, humming the occasional singing if it was a good song he liked and this drove him nuts, they were doing surveillance on one of Cruz's guy because she was held up in court and then she's going to watch theirs while the ADA is prepping them for their court date next week. He glanced over at his partner who had been sound asleep for the last hour, he didn't want to wake her knowing how much she sleep she got last night. He just wondered where she was last night, it was true it was none of his business, but he did worry about her, if anyone hurt her in any way they would have to answer to him.

He was once again the big brother, thinking that after Mikey died he would feel like an only child, but he couldn't help feeling that he was a big brother all over again with Ashley. You didn't have to be blood to be family. He learned that over at the 55.

"Crime 2, what is your location?"

Ashley jumped awake

"Holy, freakin Christ" her hand over her chest, she reached for the radio

"We're at 133 Lexington"

"Get back here now" Ashley still trying to catch her breath, puts the radio back on the dashboard

"How the hell you could let me fall asleep?" she asks as she starts the car

"Cause you've had the matter of three hours in the last 48"

"Did I miss anything?" she's looking in the review mirror fixing her hair.

"Well, the world came to an end three times, a bird almost shit on the windshield and the guys been in there for 2 hours"

"kinda makes you jealous doesn't it?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" she side glances him and he catches on. Bosco rolled down his window, his mood changed and he became stiffer than board, his jaw clenching.

They walked in to find Cruz conversing with a devishly handsome guy, his back towards them, she felt Bos tense up beside her and laughed interrupting the two talking, Cruz looked annoyed and well, she'd remember that face anywhere. After all he was the one who'd kept her up all night.

"This is ADA Hayden Lander, that's Ashley Ryans and Maurice Boscorelli" he like how his named rolled off her tongue like she said it every day"

"Ashley and I've already met" Cruz moving towards the door, Bosco blocking the way, she sidestepped him trying to get past him, he opened the door for her.

"Allow me Sarge" he motioned her to go

"I want them back on the streets by one"

"Will do Sgt"

"Why don't you just tell her that she makes you hard?" whoa, her question caught him off guard. He didn't mind that she asked the question she just asked it when a complete stranger was in the room. How the hell did someone notice you were hard unless they looked down in that area?

"And why are you looking down there?"

"Cause I saw you try to cross your legs and figured, you were trying to cover somethin' up" she glanced over smiling. Why the hell did women have to be right all the time?

"Why are women right all the time?"

"Cause someone has to be"

"If we could get back to preparing" both ignored him as they continued talking

"That's a typical woman answer"

"Watch your mouth Bubble Man" she gave him stop-now-or-I-will-tell look. He shook his head and let it go, he'd get her back.

"I'll start with Bosco first"

"Right, I need something to drink, any body else want anything?" she looked to both man both shaking their heads no. She left.

He knew the procedures off by heart so he didn't need prepping. He'd question Landers instead.

"How do you know Ashley?" Landers looking up from the file he was reading through.

"We met last night"

"What are your intentions?"

"To win the case"

"That's not what I meant"

"My intentions are honourable"

"You wanna get in her pants" Landers quickly became annoyed with this and moved on

"If we're not going to discuss the case, we're done here"

"Great" Bosco got from his chair and left.

"Hey Stan, it's Ashley…I'm good, u?…That's great… I need to talk to you about something, it ok if I come around closing time?… Great Thanks" she flips her phone shut in time to see Bosco walking down the steps two at a time and quickly walking out the door, her turn now.

Her prepping didn't take much and was out by quarter to one, Bosco nowhere in sight. Hayden had even asked her out for drinks but declined because she didn't think she would last to eleven. At the end of shift she was going to go home grab a couple of hours sleep and make it for last call, trying to avoid both her boss and partner at the bar.

The desk Sgt hadn't seen him since he walked out the door, half an hour ago. Apparently she wasn't the only person looking for him, she was on her way up the stairs when Faith stopped her.

"Hey Ashley have you seen Bosco?" Cruz saved her from answering that, as she too walked up to her and asked where he was.

"Why do you both need to talk to him?"

"Yes" Faith replied

"He has work to do" Cruz said

She couldn't help in both women the concern she saw in their eyes for the man of the hour.

"Why don't I call him?"

On the fourth ring he answered, she took a few steps forward to get a little privacy but both women stepped up too.

"Boscorelli"

"Hey Bubble Man, where are you?" both women now looking at her curiously for calling him Bubble Man

"Taking care of business"

"Like?" what hell could be more important than work?

"Petting the monkey" he's at the zoo?

"Your at the zoo?" then she clued in what he really was doing

"Never mind, I don't want to know" both women probably thought she was crazy now, if they didn't catch on.

"How long you going to be?" she heard him moaning and shivered, she didn't want to talk to him if he was playing with his stick. She heard a loud moan and knew he was done.

"That was…entertaining, now do you think you could get back to work? Cause I have two people breathing down my neck looking for you"

"Let me guess, Tyra Banks and Pam Anderson?"

"Try again"

"Faith and Cruz?"

"Ding, ding, ding"

"Give me ten"

"Wash your hands first" she flipped her phone shut, not wanting to think about what he was doing.

The rest of the shift was as entertaining as watching grass grow, other members of Anti-Crime said it was slow for them too, so they weren't the only ones having trouble meeting their quota. She couldn't help but wonder if that meant something was going to happen, throwing everything and one into chaos.

She kept in the shadows until everyone left and Stan let Cruz go saying that he could do the rest, she was reluctant but agreed. Ashley stepped out of the shadows and made her way over to the bar. Two shot glasses sat on the bar, a bottle of tequila, he started pouring once she was a few feet away. She sat down on a stool in front of him and he placed a shot glass in front of her. He picked up his own and raised his glass to her and shot it back.

"What can I help you with?" he poured him self another

"Well, Bosco has got the hots for your new waitress"

"So that explains why he's in here every night, but I'm still not following"

"They have some unfinished business, but aren't going to talk it over on their own"

"Ya I figured that, they used to work together didn't they over on the 55th?" ok how did he know that? She didn't know what to say.

"I know she's a cop, she told me" she'd known Stan for awhile and he wouldn't tell her anything that wasn't true.

"She's trying to catch the people who run drugs through here"

"Well not that we got that out of the way"

"You can start by telling me what you need"

"Bosco and Cruz, I want them to talk out their differences, alone, so they will actually talk, your place is the only place that they both come to"

"Are you saying that you want to lock them in a storage closet until they talk things out?"

"That's exactly what I was thinking"

"To tell you the truth, I thought about that myself" he pours her another shot, she downs it.

"So are we going to do this?" he pours them both another neither touch it though.

"Ya I think we are, their both too stubborn to start it themselves"

Over the next hour they worked out the details, of everything they could think of, problems they would encounter, how they would get them both into the same room and what not.

They toasted and the clinks of their glasses sealed it, one week from today, Maurice and Maritza would find themselves in a situation they couldn't get themselves out of.


	7. Phase 1

On the day of her little plan her hunch came true about something big happening. The day was busy, scooping up person after person they didn't have time to think let alone breathe. The excitement didn't stop there, they gotten involved in a very text-bookie shootout, almost getting shot at twice. The adrenaline rush they had both gotten early in the morning slowly faded away and tiredness set in. That didn't stop him however accepting Ashley's invitation to go to Stan's. He would have gone there anyways, if she didnt ask him.

They were seated at the bar, the tables full, the business was blooming making Ashley wondering if Stan could stand toloose a waitress for an hour or so. But the worry soon fled as Stan nodded at her while he was getting their beers.

The place died down around eleven; the baseball crowd had left taking most of the noise too. They could actually hear the music now, a slow country song was playing in the background. A few couples were on the dance floor slowly swaying to the music.

Bosco's attention wasn't on her though, it was on Maritza his eyes followed her wherever she went, and right now he was looking at her backside as she talked to four college kids. Obviously hitting on her, and why wouldn't anyone hit on her. She was hotter than the sun. She turned around slowly walking to the bar swaying her hips just for the guys. He quickly adverted his attention not wanting her to see him looking at her.

"I hope you don't mind but I invited Hayden to come have a few with us" Ashley helping him, advert attention away from himself. He looked at her.

"What do you see in him?"

"He's not you" she smiled and took a sip of her beer.

"You didn't seem to mind a few weeks ago"

"I was emotionally distraught"

"Right"

Stan caught her eye from the end of the bar. Phase 1 was going down. Cruz was talking to Stan and nodded then headed off in the back. He then walked over to them

"Bosco, I'm not sure if Maritza can reach the box I just sent her to get, would you mind helping her? My back ain't what it used to be"

"I don't think so, her and I don't get along"

"Do it Bubble Man, she'll see how strong and tall you are and cant help but fall completely in love with you"

"I'm taking this off as part of my payment I owe you" he got off his stool and followed Stan into the back, Ashley waited a few seconds then disappeared too, she kept back far enough for no one to see her. Bosco walked in the room and Stan quickly shut the door and turning the key in its lock. Locking both occupants in.  
"Phase 1 complete"

Bosco turned as soon as the door shut and heard the key in the lock; he tried the door seeing if his ears were playing tricks on him. They weren't the door wouldn't budge.

Maritza came around a corner not liking who she saw.

"What the hell are you doing here? Employees only"

"Stan asked me to help you"

"In what taking down a box that doesn't exist?"

"He played us?"

"Whoa, you actually got it right away, congratulations" She moved past him to try the door, the handle not turning.

"Very funny now unlock the door"

"I didn't lock it"

"Dammit!" she moved to the other side of the room away from the door, away from him not trusting herself to be so near to him and not do anything.

"I'm going to kill her"

"Who?" she gaze lifted up to him from the floor

"Ashley she, her and Stan are behind this" he was ticked at her for doing this to him

She sat down on a crate knowing they werent getting out anytime soon.

"Why'd you do it?" he quizzed her, she didn't want to answer but she wasn't about to back down either.

"I didn't, it was a cover up, I wasn't even in the building when it went off"

"Then why kiss me?"

"Because I wanted to"

"Why?" she didn't like where this was going

"Because I missed you, I wanted to see if you felt the same"

"And?"

"That's not important"

"NOT IMPORTANT?" they heard the music in the bar go up louder, trying to drown them out.

"Do you know how fucking times I woke up in a cold sweat seeing that explosion over and over again, your voice tormenting me. The kiss tormenting me?"

She did because it tormented her too, thinking of how much pain she put him through, from the kiss, where she tasted his love for her, and the explosion, letting him think she was in there. Her eyes drifted from him to the floor, not wanting him to see, the regret in her eyes.

"Do you? Every night for a fucking year, I saw your face, tasted you, and you vanished"

"I thought you hated me" her composure back she looked up to him again, he didn't answer her instead he moved on

"Why the hell was it a cover up?"

"I cant tell you that" he in front of her in seconds hauling her off the box, his hands gripping her arms. His fingers digging into her flesh.

"Tell me" he looked into her eyes, jaw clenching

"I can't"

"TELL ME" he shook her, his anger was getting the best of him, he instantly let her go and walked to the other side of the room, his head low. He tried the door again, just giving his hands something to do, he wanted to strangle her pretty little neck and touch the rest of her body.

"That's not going to work"

"Ahh so now she's willing to talk. What else am I going to do?" she frustrated him to no end.

"I sure as hell don't know"

"Then why open your mouth?"

He banged on the door

"Ashley you open this goddamn door or I swear I'll fucking kill you" the music went louder still. This was ridiculous. She was dead the moment he got out of here.

"That's really going to make her open the door" he'd had enough, he stalked back over to her, grabbing the back of her head his lips crushing hers. Her hands immediately went to his chest to push him away but couldn't, his skin on fire underneath her touch. His tongue slipping past her lips mating with hers.

* * *

Ashley not hearing anything on the other side of the door, she unlocked it and opened the door, she looked around the room until she saw what she had hoped would happen, she stepped back out and closed the door.

* * *

They both jumped apart, hearing the door closing, she looked past him, and he turned his head both seeing nothing. He tried to go back to the task they were doing before the door was opened, she pushed him away.

"Stop"

He dropped his arms and once again walked away from her. But stopped in mid stride and turned back around walking to her again.

"No I waited to long for this" he took her lips again, she gave in completely wrapping her arms around his waist drawing him closer, feeling his reaction to what she did to him, pressing against her stomach. His muscles on his back jumped by her touch exciting him even more.

She fumbled with his belt pulling it through its loops hurriedly dropping it to the floor; he pulled her shirt over her head it carelessly dropping to the ground along with his belt. He lifted her up onto the box she was previously sitting on, stepping in between her legs. Her legs encircling him drawing him even closer. He tasted her everywhere, the familiarity coming back to him, with each taste, each caress. Each kiss more satisfying then the last. Both driving each other wild, knowing where to touch each other to get the desired results, they wanted. He slipped inside her, never feeling anything so right as this moment.

* * *

Ashley walked up to the bar, setting her tray on the bar, waiting for Stan to finish getting others their drinks.

"Want to waitress for me full time?" she laughed

"No, I like my job"

"What can I get ya?"

"Martini and a margarita"

"Coming right up" he left her alone to fix the drinks, she thought about Hayden which kinda surprised her because she'd only known him a week and they were friends, she wouldn't even call him that. She did like how he made her feel, like there was no one else in the world only them two. Had she finally found her ever after?

Hayden walked into the bar, seeing Ashley at the bar he walked up beside her.

"Your early"

"So are you" Stan placed the drinks on the tray and off she went. She returned moments later

"I didn't know you worked here"

"I don't just helping out a friend who's understaffed… Oh that reminds me" she takes off in the back.

* * *

Dressing was a quiet chore for both of them not knowing what to say to the other. He did see tears in her eyes, and they meet each other half way arms wrapping around the other. She settled down soon after and one arm dropped so she could turn and stand beside him, intertwined with him. He kissed the top of her head, squeezing her closer.

Ashley opened the door, to find Bosco kissing the top of her head; she waited until they saw her to say anything.

"I came as soon as I knew what Stan did" Maritza and Bosco smiled

"Mmmhmm"

"Honest" trying her hardest not to smile

"Then why are you were an apron?" she glanced down to see the half apron she put on an hour and half ago, to take Cruz's place

'I just bought these pants don't want to spill anything" she quickly untied the strings and held the apron in her hand. Both looked at each other before advancing towards her, the look in their eyes had Ashley back towards the door.

"C'mon guys, I'm sure we can work it out" taking two large steps back, both keep coming closer to her. She steps back into the doorway, they become within reaching distance.

"I can lock you in here again" she croaked out wondering how many feet it was to the door outside.

Bosco lunges for her as she turns and runs, him coming after her, she pushes the door open and runs into the bar, on lookers wonder what she's doing, as he follows her out, she runs past everyone and out the door. Him close behind. She kept running, the distance between them becoming greater.

"Bosco let's talk about this, I mean you two did get together right?"

"It's not like this was for nothing" the footsteps stopped behind her and she risked a glance behind her. He stopped bent over catching his breath. She slowed too, finally coming to a stop, she turned he was now walking towards her.

"Ashley"

"Are you going to hurt me?" he took a step closer she took two back

"No"

"Promise?"

"Cross my heart" he crossed his chest with his finger

She looked him, seeing if he really meant it, the cloud covered moon, didn't help her see his face.

"Seriously?" she took a step closer

"Absolutely" he held up his hands to show her, he wasn't going to do anything. She took another step closer. This time when he reached for her, he hugged her.

"Thank you" he let her go, grabbed her arm and walked her back to the bar.

"You have a date waiting"


	8. Darkness

She was surprised that Bosco actually left them alone, and even got them a table, which shocked her to say the least. She learned more about Hayden, and by the end of the night she felt like she'd known him for her whole life.

* * *

Ashley made sure she and Bosco were the last ones in Anti-Crime before instructions were given out, dreading what would happen if she were early. Cruz was almost done giving instructions, making Ashley think she was in the clear but that soon ending when she heard Cruz's final instruction.

"Bosco your with Timmins and Ryans your with me" she knew exactly why and couldn't help but wonder what her punishment would be for last night. Maybe Sarge would thank her for getting her and Bosco back together but she figured Cruz wasn't the one to say thank you very often.

Everyone filed out leaving the two ladies alone, Cruz bending over her desk writing something. She got extremely nervous, when Cruz would look up every few seconds. She didn't like the feeling when she wasn't the one administrating the nervousness. Cruz still didn't say anything when they started down the stairs towards the door. Ashley walking rather slowly, hoping that it put off the confrontation they were going to have. She couldn't stand it any longer.

"Would you just tell me what you're going to do with me?" by then Cruz had reached the bottom of the stairs. She stopped and turned around looking at Ashley and smiled, then her face changed to something Ashley couldn't place but she knew it wasn't good. Cruz started back up the stairs, Ashley wanted to run but that wouldn't look good, and would only aggravate the situation even more. Ashley started backing up, back up the stairs, she over estimated and the stairs ran out and she went flying backwards to her butt.

Pain instantly shot through her butt, but her pride was hurt even more when she noticed when others saw what had happened. Cruz was standing in front of her, hiding her smile as she extended her hand out to Ashley. She took and quickly got up.

"You ok?"

"I'm fine but pride suffered a little"

"I wouldn't worry about it" they walked down the stairs together, Ashley still reluctant to go with her, Cruz stopped, Ashley did too. Cruz turned to her and hugged her. For a second when Ashley saw Cruz coming towards her that she was actually going to hit her, but soon learned other wise.

The usual chaotic precinct went quiet when they saw the scene before them. Cruz stepped back and out the door. Ashley at a loss for words walked out the door, hearing the chaotic noise start back up again.

* * *

"Does this mean we're cool now?" she back out of the parking space and soon they were off, the street names becoming a blur to them as they wove deeper into the city.

"Ya" the soft humming of the cars engine the only noise between them.

"Where we going?"

"You ever hear of Ricky's Bistro?" she had, eaten there once or twice

"Ya, they got a good steak there"

"We're going to the park right beside it" Gorilla's, the deadliest gang hung out there in the day time, moving a couple blocks down in the night. She kept quiet, that place was a cop's worst place to go, not many survived there, so they kept away. She didn't want to admit but they were at greater risk because they were female. Bosco would get a kick out of that her admitting that sometimes a man was actually stronger. Bosco would seriously kill her if she let anything happen to Cruz, she wasn't ready to die yet.

"What for?" she tried to keep the fear from rising in her voice.

"Just because" that wasn't going to cut it.

She pulled off the road into a parking space and put the car in park.

"You tell me why or I wont take you"

"Don't make me order you to take me" she didn't have to tell her why she was going

"Go ahead, I wont listen"

"Then I'll have to transfer you back and write you up" the two looked at each other both meaning what they had just said

"You do what you have to do, I'll do what I have to" neither backing down. Cruz looked away first

"They're making little kids doing there bidding, selling drugs, cooking, so they wont get caught" smart people, she couldn't help but feel sorry for the kids, just trying to help their mom's out, who more than likely had five kids and making minimum wage.

She put the car into drive and pulled out into the street again

"Was that really so hard?" knowing that she won the battle but had a hard time believing that she would actually win the war. Not with Cruz as her opponent. It would be one hell of a war though.

* * *

She pulled up in front of the park, counting how many there were 12, 13, 14, 15. Fifteen against two, both sides had guns, her side had back up and would come momentarily if needed, but the other side had more powerful guns, that could take out, five guys to their one. She didn't like this, not one bit.

"You got a plan?" even if she didn't like it, she wanted to go in with a plan, that would give them an advantage, not a very good one but it was something.

"You stay at the car, while I go chat" was she born yesterday? Did Cruz really see her that way?

"What do you think I am? Someone who was born yesterday? Obviously cause you just flew off your rocker"

"One person doesn't raise a threat"

"Marcel Hollis ring a bell? With one phone call, he destroyed your precinct, and you one person 'blew' yourself up to take him down. One person can do a hell of a lot of damage"

"I'm ordering you to stay here"

"And if I don't?"

"You will, if you know what's good for you"

Ashley's cell phone cut through the tension, she answered without looking at the caller ID, something she usually never did but she had other things on her mind

"What"

"Ash is-" she noticed Cruz getting out of the car. Dammit!

"Cruz NO- Bosco I gotta go" she flipped it shut and raced out of the car. Cruz was halfway to them by the time she got to the fence, if she walked up to her now, they'd be on their guard, fingers itching to pull the trigger, may be even would by accident. She stood waiting at the front a thousand thoughts running through her mind.

How did Bosco know to call right at the very moment that Cruz and her were arguing? Cruz! That conniving little bitch! She called Bosco, when? Obviously when they were arguing, uuggggghhhh! And her not answering prompted him to call her cell, looking for her. She wanted to kill her! She wanted to shoot herself too, for falling for that. Something a kid could have pulled off. That woman had a mind of her own, a smart mind too. If it were her, she just would have punched Bosco until he agreed, but he would behind her all the way. She would see to it that her and Cruz would never be partnered again. She now knew what that woman was made of and wouldn't make that same mistake again.

Her cell rang again, she glanced at Cruz, she was talking to what she guessed was the leader, at least she's not getting shot, but she had a feeling it wouldn't be long before something went wrong, her phone kept ringing.

"What the hell do you want?" knowing that it would be Bosco, looking for Cruz

"Is she ok?"

"I'm looking right at her, why?"

"She called me but there was nothing on her end" She was right, names run through her head of what she wanted to call her but wouldn't because he would yell at her. It was unprofessional.

"Must have been a glitz" if she told him the truth he would be here in five minutes flat, no matter where he was

"What are you not telling me?" he didn't sound convinced

"Nothing, she's out getting something to drink"

"Where?"

"Oh no, I'm not telling you were, we both have work to do" she looked again at Cruz still talking, about what she didn't know.

"Please?"

"No" she shifted so her phone was on her shoulder leaving her hands free. If need be she could reach both her radio and gun at a moments notice. He continued to drone one why he wanted to see her. Her gaze kept dropping to the ground, away from Cruz, which she didn't notice. She heard the gunshot her head snapping up then saw Cruz going down, the crowd disappearing in every way possible. Her phone forgotten, dropped down to the ground as she took off running yelling into her radio

"10-13, 10-13 OFFICER DOWN, SHOTS FIRED!"

Cruz was on her side, her arms clutching her stomach, coughing, her breath coming out in short gasps.

"Cruz, cruz can you hear me?" she searched for the entry wound and found it on her chest. She applied pressure, to the wound, wondering where the damn cops were, where the medics were. She didn't know how long Cruz had, or how long she had they were in enemy territory it wouldn't be long before others came back to see if they finished what they started. She heard sirens in the background

She didn't see people coming behind her, or the baseball bat that connected with the back of her head.

All she saw was darkness.

She didn't even hear Bosco screaming through her forgotten phone lying only feet away from her.

* * *

A/N: I had to add some kind of violence in here, just for fun. It's also a little shorter than usual too. Not by much though. 


	9. Pain

A/N: Well how did you like last chapter? Hmm things wont get any better really, with the injuries and all. Mostly Ashley based, with a little Bosco thrown in.

* * *

Her chest burned, her eyes on fire, her head aching and it hurt more with every breath she took. The noise slowly came back to her telling her that she was no longer in the streets, waiting for help. She didn't know what had happened to her, the last thing she could remember was asking Cruz if she could hear her, then blackness, everywhere choking her.

She saw white bright lights and wondering if she was dead but then heard the beeping of a machine and figured she was for now in the hospital, the extent of her injuries she didn't know, they hurt her, badly.

Her vision came back too, slowly at first all she saw was black and white then slowly colour by colour came back until she understood that she was in a pale yellow room, light blue blanket covering her and the rest she didn't care. She had to know if Cruz was ok.

She tried to sit up, bad mistake on her part, intense pain shot through every bone in her body. She knew nothing was broken; her limbs weren't heavy from the weight a cast, so that was good. Sleep kept calling her name, but she refused to close her eyes again, her eyes lids kept drooping shut and each time it grew harder for her to keep them open for a long period of time, she finally gave in as unconscious claimed her once again.

When she awoke the second time a nurse was hovering above her, scaring her a bit, but the nurse's smile calmed her back down. The nurse checked her vitals and soon left promising a doctor to come talk to her within minutes.

"You suffered a very mild concussion, a contusion on the back of the head, and three cracked ribs, and a fat lip" that explained why it hurt like hell to move, or even breathe for that matter.

She'd waited long enough, time to find out if she was a murderer, if Cruz had died it was her fault, of all the times she didn't listen she chose this time to listen.

"How is Sgt Cruz?" her voice came out, in a scratchy non-human tone, she didn't even recognize as her own.

"I'm afraid the news isn't good" she was a murderer, the guilt already starting to set in, Bosco would never speak to her again, others would blame her for letting Cruz die, she didn't know if she could take it

"With her its touch and go, the bullet nicked a lung and her heart, right now she's in a coma, she'll be lucky if she ever wakes again" that was almost as bad as saying she had died. How could she have been so stupid? She should have run after her, catching up with her, maybe then she could monitor the words being said, somehow prevented or even stopped it from all going down.

"Is Officer Boscorelli here?" the doctor had no clue what she was talking about

"He's about 5'9 shaggy brown hair, and thinks he's gods gift to women"

"Oh him, he's with Sgt Cruz right now" that was a relief, but she woke up alone, had no one to see if she was alright and that hurt her.

She threw the covers off her, and started moving to get out of bed, cursing under her breathe, she didn't think the pain would be this bad.

"You have three cracked ribs, what in god's name do you think you're doing?" she looked to the doctor.

"I am going to see how my friend is, you can help me or let me do it on my own, either way I'm going. You helping will cause me a lot less pain"

The pain so intense that she saw white lines shooting across her vision, she blinked and they were gone. The doctor helped her the rest of the way and into her robe, he offered his arm to her so she didn't have to depend on herself, in which she was grateful. The moment she had tried to get out of bed she'd regretted moving. She wasn't about to let that stop her though, her friend needed her.

They were at the door, leading into the rest of the hospital when Hayden came barreling in almost knocking her down and saying a few well chosen words a little louder than a whisper.

"What do you think your doing?" he looked from her to the doctor

"Going to see Bosco, he needs a friend right now"

"He does but, not one who's half dead herself, get back into bed right now" if he thought he could control her, he had another thing coming.

"Bite me" she motioned the doctor to go; they made very little progress before Hayden took over the doctor's position.

"Here let me do that" he kept her close to his side, trying to ease the pain. Nothing seemed to ease the pain. It got worse with every step she took and knew that if she wanted to get better she was going to have to keep moving, even if it momentarily killed her.

"I came as soon as I got Bosco's call" maybe she did have someone there for her

"He called you?" not really believing him

"Ya right after he left you" "Told me if I really cared to get my ass here and quick"

She held back tears not really knowing where they come from.

"C'mon on now little darlin don't cry" noticing a few tears running down her cheeks. He stopped her and ran his thumbs across her cheeks to wipe away the tears. She smiled through her tears; her stomach did a flip-flop when he touched her, even if the contact was minimal. Soon his thumbs became his whole hand as he placed them on her cheeks and brought her head forward and kissed her forehead. That should have been enough but it wasn't she wanted to taste his lips on hers. She ignored the pain as she brought an arm up to his neck and pulled his head down to hers, their lips carelessly touching. He pulled her to him seeking more than just a peck, his body heating up quickly, the sharp intake of breath cooled him right off. He let go of her immediately, her face winced in pain.

"I am so sorry" how could he have been so careless?

"It's ok" her hand over her stomach, trying to ease the pain.

"No its not I got carried away, when I shouldn't have" he ran a hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up. He looked really cute, like that but her injuries wouldn't allow her to act on that.

"I'm fine don't blame yourself" He took her arm again allowing her to walk a little faster.

Why did this have to happen? Why when he just got her back? He didn't even know what happened. But somehow knew that she got them both involved, always the fighter. Never the peacekeeper, her being a peacekeeper, them both peacekeeper now that was a funny thought.

Somehow they made it to his room, without her keeling over in pain, and the scene before her broke her heart, he was bent over her bed holding her lifeless hand. A machine doing the task of breathing, she couldn't help but feel responsible for this, if only she had gone with her or refused to take her.

Hayden helped her walk over to him, him unaware that she was even in the room, she placed her hands on his shoulders, the only thing she could do that wouldn't hurt her. Letting him know that she was there for him, like he was her.

"It's going to be ok Bos, she's going to wake up soon" he cried for the first time he knew her, he turned to wrap his arms around her waist and she held him letting him cry for everything. She couldn't help but cry too.

Neither knew how long they stood like that, unaware of everything, just being there for each other. Soon his eyes dried and no came out, he let go of her.

"Ashley I gotta go, a verdict just came in on one of my cases"

"Go, thank you"

"You don't have to thank me"

Bosco stood up and shook Hayden's hand surprising them both.

"I am thanking you for being with Ashley, when I couldn't"

"I was just lucky you called me. I'll see you all later" he kissed Ashley on the forehead and walked out.

"He's a nice man" this day was full of surprises

"What do you want Bosco?"

"Now why do you think I want something?"

"Because you do will you just tell me what you want" she would try her hardest to get it for him, even if she died trying.

"Will you please tell me everything that happened, and don't sugar coat it" when she said she would do anything she meant everything but that. He didn't need the truth.

"What have you been told?" so she knew what she had to go on.

"That you were beaten up, and she was shot" not much to more to say really

"Well that's basically what happened" she tried her hardest not to look at him; she had a habit of looking directly at the person when she was lying. She risked a glance at him, giving herself away.

"Please Ashley, I need to know" he had a right to know but it didn't make this any easier in deciding whether or not to tell him.

The pain was coming back again, telling her the painkillers were wearing off. This could be her chance to leave telling him she needed pain medication, he would understand, would have to understand. But she remained there, standing in front of him as he held his Ritza's hand, never letting go.

"Whose fault was it?" she couldn't put blame on anyone but herself

"It was mine, she wasn't in the store when you called she was talking to the Gorilla's alone by herself, I was at the entrance to the park, talking to you"

"She pulled one over one me, and I fell for it, I don't know how she did it but she must of called you while we were arguing, I don't know the details but you called me giving her time to get out of the car and half way to them before I got to the opening, if I went up to her, they would have done something, so I stayed back"

"If I had known that she would have done this from the start I wouldn't have drove her. I'm soo sorry Bosco" tears threatened to come out once again, she didn't want them to but they spilled over her eyes and down her cheeks.

She didn't know if she could handle it if, he said he never wanted to see her again, but she would have to, she had been through worse things then this. He wasn't saying anything, and she desperately needed medicine. She didn't know what else to say so she left, she would have liked to get out of there quicker but she was pushing it going as quick as she could.

Why was she so stupid, she was better off not letting anyone in that way they wouldn't hurt her. She didn't need anyone to help her, anything that needed doing she could get it done by herself.

She just wished she could convince herself that.

* * *

A/N: I havent decided whether or not i want the relationship between Ashley and Bosco to end, or become at a stand still. Let me know!


	10. Ballernia Doll

A/N: Decided what I wanted to do with the two of them, you'll be happy to know him and Cruz are still together. As for Bosco and Ashley well just read on. Next chapter well, just going to have to wait! Hayden gets some screen time

* * *

He hadn't came to see her the other two days she was in the hospital, nor the two weeks she spent on complete bed rest, her in bed for two weeks that drove her crazy she did it for a day and had enough, she spent her time doing things that needed to be done, her not as easily as she would have like but at least she had attempted them, what the doctor didn't know couldn't hurt him. 

He still hadn't talked to her by the time she went back to work, well desk work but at least she wasn't driving herself nuts by sitting at home doing nothing. She knew they needed to talk but when she didn't know, it was up to him. But she wasn't going to wait her whole life either.

She'd heard that Cruz had woken up a week ago, making around the time that Ashley went back to work, and from what she had learned a few minutes ago Cruz was going home today. She couldn't be happier for her.

Her ribs hurt a little less each day, meaning they were healing, another week or two she could be back out on the street fighting crime. In Anti-Crime or back to uniform she didn't know yet, she'd deal with that when the time came. Bosco was back in uniform having no one to partner up with him, Timmin's partner came back from vacation two weeks ago.

Everyone knew something had had happened between them, noticing how they went from talking to each other to not even looking at each other when they walked by one another, some had even gotten up the courage to ask, but all they got were death glares from both. It was no body's business except hers and his, even the desk Sgt had asked if everything was ok between them, he'd lucked out and got a 'fine' from her but nothing else.

He looked extremely stressed today, he should be happy his girlfriend had went home yesterday, not looking like he was ready to kill, was taking care of her that upsetting? He was still her friend even though he would never admit it, she decided since the desk Sgt was talking on the phone she could take her escape without him saying too much. She had seen him go into the locker room only moments before. He sat on the bench across from his locker head in hands, something was really bothering him. She'd find out what was bothering him and then leave. With him still hating her, something she would have to deal with for now, that was if he told her what was bothering him. Couldn't hurt to try.

She slid down on the bench beside him; she didn't think he noticed her, too caught up in whatever he was caught up in.

"Bosco what's wrong?" he held up an envelope, the problem was really big if he actually was going to tell her.

She took the envelope and read the address, the hospital. She took the letter out, skimmed it a bunch of medical gargle until she reached the bottom of the page her jaw dropping

"That's a lot of money" a small fortune, a large small fortune.

"Money she doesn't have" she then saw who it was addressed to. Maritza Cruz.

"Doesn't her insurance cover it?" she didn't know what else to do so she continued to try and understand the mumble jumble of the doctor's language.

"Not all of it, they cover two thousand of it" that left the small fortune still large.

"I'm sorry Bosco" she was it would take years to pay off that kind of debt.

"Don't worry about it, I'll just work overtime" he went back into his own world again, leaving her alone, she stood up, her ribs protesting she ignored them and placed the envelope in his opened locker. And left him alone.

Later that night she sat in her car at a red light, no one behind her, just like her life, no one was there backing her up, except Hayden, even him hadn't talked to her in a couple of days.

_Unsure of yourself_  
_You stand divided now.  
__Which road will lead you there?_

Left went home, right went to a place where she hoped in time she hoped he would forgive her.

_Last time you fell and you hit hard  
__Your wounds have healed by now  
__But you still see your scars yeah_

She couldn't stand it anymore and turned. She got home feeling better than she had in a few weeks her ribs weren't even bothering her at the moment. She busied herself with making something to eat, pushing all that paperwork made her hungry. She was cutting celery for her salad when Hayden knocked on her door. It was the last and first person she thought she would see.

"Hey darlin" he leaned in for a kiss and wasn't disappointed as she kissed him and took a few bags from his hands.

"What's in the bags?" she sat them on her kitchen counter.

"Food"

"Food's good" she reached in the cupboard for some plates.

"No need for plate's its Chinese" she put them back.

"What do you want to drink, I have water and" she looks in her fridge "beer"

"Beer's fine" she grabs two and closes the fridge. She grabs a bag and carries it to her coffee table.

"What no table?"

"Just wanted to eat in here" he carried the rest in here and started rooted through the bags.

"I'm sorry I haven't called or stopped by, I was working on this case that took up all my free time, I even forgot to sleep one night"

"It's fine"

"Why do you keep saying it's fine when it's not?"

"Because it is" she looked at him directly in the eye. Everything was fine or would be.

"So how was your day darlin?"

"It sucked paper work all day, next week I get to go back to uniform so things will pick up" He nodded and dug into a carton of food.

"So how was yours?" he swallowed

"Oh not exciting as yours, I was in court most of the day and just waiting on the jury to come back on the evidence"

"You think you'll win?"

"It's actually quite hard to tell, we both had some good evidence so I guess we wont know until the jury comes back"

"I hope you win"

"Me too"

"Enough talk, I'm starved" he put the carton down, Ashley unaware continued eating. She finally felt his stare and stopped eating.

"Did I slop or something?" she looked down at her shirt, seeing nothing she looked back up.

"No" her eyebrows drew together in confusion

"Then what?" he moved closer to her taking the carton from her. His lips met hers. And soon kissing wasn't enough as her hand slipped to his buttons taking her time with each ones. She ran her hands down his exposed chest, dropping down further to his pants, his hand stopped hers.

"Are you sure?"

"I've never been more sure of anything than this" he hand moved away from hers to rest in her hair as her hands continued to undo his belt.

* * *

If she never read again then she'd be ok, so many papers had been pushed in her face today that it must have taken a small forest to produce them. She had her heart content on falling into bed, and not waking up for the next five years. She'd just gotten in the door when it flew open again, Bosco leaving a trail of imaginary fire as he sped past her into her living room 

"Hello to you too"

"Why'd you do it?"

"I'm tired I'm not in the mood to play games"

"I know it was you that paid her bill" her secret was out, she turned right last night and made a quick visit to the billing department before going home.

"What else was I supposed to do? Let her suffer, let you suffer?" "I didn't want you or her to suffer for something I did"

"This is our problem not yours"

"How can I not be mine, I'm the reason she got shot!"

"No your not, she is, I know you don't want to admit that but could you stop her from going to them? No, no one could have"

"Why cant you just let this go as a good deed?"

"Because I know you don't do anything as a good deed, you always have an alter motive"

"This time I didn't"

" I know you, why did you do it?"

"Because I thought maybe if I did do it you would stop blaming me, your good at that aren't you blaming people for things"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You know exactly what it means"

He stood there shaking his not believing she was accusing him of blame people for his problems.

"You know why no one likes you? Because you don't say anything about your personal life, I live with you and know nothing about you"

"Well that's about to change, I'm moving in with Cruz"

"Does she know your past, then at least someone will. I told you everything and what do I get in return? Huh? Nothing, no insight, no one little memory nothing"

He remained silent,

"You know friendship goes both ways. I don't even know your mother's name and we've been partners for six years!"

"I DON'T NEED TO BE SOME CHARITY CASE"

"YOU THINK THAT WHAT THIS IS?"

"PAYING OUT FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS SEEMS LIKE A CHARITY CASE TO ME"

"I PAID HER BILL BECAUSE I'M YOUR FRIEND, OR AT LEAST I THOUGHT I WAS BUT ALL YOU SAW ME AS WAS SOME ONE TRYING TO TURN YOU INTO SOME CHARITY CASE!"

" I NEVER SAID THAT"

"YOU WERE IMPLYING IT"

"WHY WONT YOU LISTEN TO ME?" his anger got the best of him and throws a vase across the room, shattering upon impact against the wall.

"BECAUSE YOU WON'T LET ME LISTEN!"

"IT'S HARD, THE ONE PERSON THAT I TRUSTED IS DEAD, OK IT'S NOT EASY FOR ME TO OPEN UP TO SOMEONE"

"IT WAS FOR ME TOO BUT DO YOU THINK I LET THAT STOP ME? I DID IT TWICE IN A WEEK PLUS SLEPT WITH YOU, I THINK THAT'S SAYING SOMETHING"

"WELL THE TOWN SHOULD JUST GIVE YOU A MEDAL FOR YOUR BRAVE ACTS"

_I know I've been mistaken  
but just give me a break and see the changes that I've made_

"You're a prick"

"I'd rather be a prick than a murderer"

_I've got some imperfections  
But how can you collect them all and throw them in my face_

"This has nothing to do with my past"

"You were just talking about it"

"I was using it to tell you, you know everything about me and I know nothing about you"

"YOU WANNA KNOW SOMETHING ABOUT ME? OK HERE IT IS. I'M AFRAID OF THE DARK BECAUSE MY FATHER USED TO BREAK INTO HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO BEAT MY MOTHER, I SUFFERED A PANIC ATTACK BECAUSE OF 9/11, I GOT POISON IVY FROM AN EX GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHY, I WAS ALMOST KILLED IN A FIRE BECAUSE SOME IDIOT THOUGHT IT WAS COOL TO WATCH A BUILDING BURN, I WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR A PARAMEDIC DYING, IT WAS THE GUY'S CAR THAT BLEW HER UP, DONALD MANN KILLED MY BROTHER BECAUSE I WELL I DON'T KNOW WHY, 'SUPPOSEDLY KILLED HIS SON', WAS IN THE HOSPITAL FOR OVER THREE MONTHS BECAUSE DONALD, SENT MEN TO THE HOSPITAL AND TRIED TO KILL ME, CRUZ AND YOKAS, THAT ENOUGH OR SHOULD I GO ON?"

She stayed quiet, not sure what to say.

"OK I WILL, YOKAS MY OWN PARTNER TURNED ME IN BECAUSE I ASKED HER TO SHOOT FOR ME BECAUSE OF MY EYE" so that was why he had the bandage when he first came "THEN I WATCH MY EX-GIRLFRIEND BLOW HERSELF UP HAPPY NOW?" not even close

"You think that by telling me all this is somehow going to change all of this?" his anger was once again taking out by throwing a glass object any place he knew that would make it shatter,

"Would you stop trashing my place, you don't have to clean the place up" he broke a couple more objects just to infuriate her. She walked over t her door jerking it open with more force than necessary.

"I WANT YOU OUT, AND YOU ARE NOT TO SPEAK TO ME AGAIN UNTIL YOU CAN APOLIGIZE FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE" he was done, he'd alienated the only person that understood him, his shoulders low, he walked over to the door, always having to have the last word he said in the most normal tone he could muster at this moment

"Her name is Rose" he walked out the door, the door slamming shut behind him.

_She sits among the pieces  
of broken glass and photographs  
Reluctantly releases the  
Last of what was her past  
it struck without a warning or  
Did she just ignore the signs  
In those dark clouds forming  
Behind her silver lines?_

_The door  
It slammed like thunder  
And the tears  
They fell like rain  
And the warnings_

_  
Whirl like a hurricane  
She's drowning in emotions  
And she cannot  
Reach the shore  
She's alive but  
Can she survive the storm?_

She was done, done with Bosco, done with people, and that meant Hayden too. Why did this hurt so much? She walked into her bedroom to a box in her closet, that no one knew about, she pulled it down and picked up the only thing that tied her with her grandmother. The music box she'd gotten when she was seven, she opened it the ballerina still twirled around as music played, tears clouded her vision as she threw it on the floor, the dancer bouncing off, and the glass shattering, she left her room, not being able to stand looking at it.

A_ broken jewel box dancer  
Lies in pieces down the hall  
She's finding out the answers  
Don't change nothing at all  
It's time that  
She stopped searching  
For who's to blame or  
What went wrong  
The only thing  
For certain is he's gone  
She's got to move on_

She'd gotten along just fine by herself, she didn't need anyone. Time to put that mantra to use. She grabbed her keys and left, to have the dreaded conversation that she didn't want to have but had to with Hayden.

_Someday days just roll on by  
Without a gray cloud in the sky  
She keeps telling herself  
"I will make it on my own"_

Her courage left her as she made it closer to his apartment, she'd never been here before, but he had told her the story of how he got the apartment and he'd let it slip the address and number. Now or never I can make it on my own. She knocked on the door, waiting a few seconds before he answered, shirtless his hair still wet from the shower she must of interrupted.

"Hey Ash, I was just going to come over" she pushed her way in

"We need to talk"

* * *

A/N: Used a lot of songs in this one, the first and second little lyric verse is This Time by Three Doors Down, the third and fourth are Right Here by Staind, the rest is The Storm by Garth Brooks. 


	11. Pigheaded Idiots

A/N: I just realized that is this has moved away from Bosco and Cruz to Ashley, I'll try to add Bosco and Cruz in more, and Ashley less, I just think it's easier to put Ashley in because she's my character, I know how she would act, where Bosco and Cruz are already been played. I know i make no sense but just read.

* * *

Hayden took the 'talk' rather well, but she knew the moment she looked in his eyes he was hurting. What was she to do? They probably would just break up some day so she was saving both himself and her the pain. It was for the better really, honestly.

The steady rain that started last night continued well into day, as she worked excited that today was her last day before she went back to uniform, no more pushing papers. She was happy about that, but feared who her partner might be. If she knew what would have happened that day she would have called in sick. She'd been there an hour when it had happened, Hayden come in looking like he hadn't sleep and drunk, not a good combination.

"Where is he?" he slurred out as he made his way over to the front desk

"Hayden go home and sleep it off before I have to arrest you" he was a lawyer he should be the prime role model to behave according to the law, not break it. His face changed within seconds and he looked sober.

"Tell me where he is Ashley"

"No"

Speaking of the devil he came down the stairs having just finished role call, looking rather depressed, Hayden walked over to him, she couldn't hear what they were saying but knew something was up when they both left to go outside. She put the file down she was holding and walked out

"I'll be back"

"Where are you going?"

"To stop a fight"

Too late, they'd already started by the time she got out there. Both knew how to hold their ground, so this fight someone was going to get hurt pretty bad. She had to stop it before it got out of hand. She took her chance when they both stepped apart preparing for the next attack, big mistake, she was in the middle and they came charging at her arms flying she tried to get out of the way but wasn't quick enough and ended up getting a good punch in the eye and one to her jaw. She didn't know which one hurt more, her whole face was aching. She tried moving her jaw but stopped when the pain told her she should stop, she touched her already protruding eye, that was going to leave a mark. Both men came rushing at her again, this time the fight forgotten.

"Holy fucking shit, mother of fucking pearl, you son of a bitches" the string of curses flew out of her mouth before she could stop them. Both men trying to touch her see if she was ok

"Stay the hell away from me, both of you" they backed off. She walked into the precinct, she saw the desk Sgt laugh before his straightened and his face became neutral.

"What happened to you?"

"Never get in between to pig-headed idiots" he nodded, the nod telling her, he already knew that.

"Unless you wave a gun or use your baton" he said smiling,

"But who would have to file the paper work when I took my gun out?" she had him there.

"As long as the two fighting aren't police officers from your precinct, I wouldn't file it"

she couldn't believe he just admitted that to her. Learn something new every day. She also learned the length's that two pig-headed idiots would go for her to forgive them, over the course of the shift she received, flowers, candy, chocolate and the latest edition was a stuffed bear.

It didn't stop there though, she kept receiving phone calls every ten minutes from both seeing if she was ok, if she needed anything and that they were sorry. She shut her phone off after an hour and now screened the calls that came in, through the house phone.

She didn't know if this meant that her and Bosco were back to being friends or not, that was something that would have to wait because if she took a call from Bos then she would have to from Hayden too, she really didn't want to talk to either of them yet.

The waiting lasted until end of shift when he came in and made his way up the stairs, to the locker room, he was changing when she walked up to him, not sure how to start it, she jumped in.

"This mean your talking to me now?"

"I wouldn't have called if I wasn't"

"Ya you both got annoying so I shut my phone off"

"I figured that"

"Look Bosco-

"Don't worry about it" he finished buttoning up his shirt "I hear you get off desk duty tomorrow"

"Yep"

"Well if your looking for a partner I may know one" she couldn't help but tease him, knowing this wasn't hard for him

"Really who?" she smiled looking at him, he opened his mouth to speak but she stopped him

"I'd be happy too Partner" she extended her hand, hoping he would take she didn't want to have one of those awkward moments when someone extended their hand and the other didn't take it. He shook her hand and pulled her into hug.

They walked down the steps still talking and catching up on the week they shared.

"Hey you two" both looking up seeing Cruz still a little worst for the wear but otherwise looked ok,

"I thought I told you to stay at home"

"There's nothing to do at home, that's why I came to see if my favourite man wanted to go get some supper with me"

"It's just past eleven thirty"

"I know doesn't mean I'm not hungry"

"Anything for my princess"

"Princess?" she never thought Bosco was the one to call someone by a nickname, and princess no less.

"Well, well Bubble Man I do believe that you've fallen on your head today"

"Looks like you've fallen harder what happened to you?" she wondered what she would do to Bosco if she told him what happened, she'd hint but wouldn't let nothing out, it was up to him to tell her.

"I tried to stop two pig-headed idiots, big mistake"

"Do you want to come have something to eat with us?"

"No sorry I don't think I could eat real food right now, my jaw kinda hurts"

"I said I was sorry"

"You hit her?" she turned on him

"By mistake" he avoid both woman's stare and tried to become invisible by backing out of the conversation,

"Who was the other pig headed idiot?"

"Me" Cruz turned around, Bosco glanced up,

"I was the one who gave her the black eye" Hayden carrying flowers walked up to them.

"Why the hell would you two be fighting?" she turned around to Bosco "I thought you said he was a good guy?"

"Water under the bridge" Ashley answered for all of them. "You two have a nice supper" she looked at Hayden and they walked off.

"What was the fight really about?" Cruz crossed her arms, determined to leave the precinct with the answer

"Don't worry about it" he tugged on one of her arms until it was at her side and laced his fingers with hers and tried to get her to leave

"I want an answer" she dug her heels into the ground, she didn't know, he wasn't going to tell her, she pouted, his heart swelled, he knew he made the right decision

"Let's go I'm starved" he tried pulling her again

"When aren't you?" his voice dropped so only she could hear

"when I'm inside you" she did something he thought she didn't do. She blushed.

"Well I'm sure we could work something out" she was the one pulling him now, and he followed her greedily.

"How's your eye?" he said instead of getting into things they needed to talk about, relationships weren't a strong suit of his.

"Sore, who knew you could pack a punch"

"Not me, that's for sure" she smiled.

"I'm sorry" he stopped her, the pale moon light illuminating her face, he'd never seen more beautiful.

"You don't have to apologize" he ran a finger down her cheek.

"Yes I do, I hurt you"

"I'd say your making it up to me right now, by being with me" she looked into his eyes, he truly meant that.

"I'm glad I could be of service" he pulled her chin up with his finger

"I'm not hurting you am I?"

"No"

"Good cause I don't think I could hurt the woman I'm in love with" No one had ever said those words to her, not even David and he said he loved her, she didn't know what else to do. So she kissed him.

* * *

(A/N: I think this song goes to both couples so I'll put it right here Amazed by Lonestar)

_Every time our eyes meet  
This feeling inside me  
Is almost more than I can take  
Baby when you touch me  
I can feel how much you love me  
And it just blows me away  
I've never been this close to anyone or anything  
I can hear your thoughts  
I can see your dreams  
I don't know how you do what you do  
I'm so in love with you  
It just keeps getting better  
I wanna spend the rest of my life  
With you by my side  
Forever and ever  
Every little thing that you do  
Baby I'm amazed by you_

_The smell of your skin  
The taste of your kiss  
The way you whisper in the dark  
Your hair all around me  
Baby you surround me  
You touch every place in my heart  
Oh it feels like the first time every time  
I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes_

_I don't know how you do what you do  
I'm so in love with you  
It just keeps getting better  
I wanna spend the rest of my life  
With you by my side  
Forever and ever  
Every little thing that you do  
Baby I'm amazed by you_

_Every little thing that you do  
I'm so in love with you  
It just keeps getting better  
I wanna spend the rest of my life  
With you by my side  
Forever and ever  
Every little thing that you do  
Oh, every little thing that you do  
Baby I'm amazed by you._


	12. Taking the Next Step

A/N: Just like I said I would, I tried to put it more Bosco based with some Ashley thrown in, sorry its been a while but I had to think of something to write about, which I'm still debating doing the while Rose meeting thing. And I haven't decided which one Rose will like better. Let me know what ya think! Happy Reading!

* * *

"I want you to meet ma" came from Bosco's mouth before he bit his slice of pizza, she was speechless for one, and well she didn't know what to call it, she hadn't expected it.

She bit into her slice, chewed and swallowed before she answered.

"What brought this on?" she took a sip of her drink

"Well I just thought it was time, I met your sister and I know how much she meant to you and now I want you to me someone who means a lot to me" how sweet it wasn't the answer she was looking for but hey is it ever the answer you want when its coming from a guy? She knew quite a few men and no they only gave the answer they thought the woman wanted to hear.

* * *

Ashley laid on top of Hayden on her couch, both just having calmed from having make up sex. Her head sideways, hearing his heartbeat, the steady rhythm soothing her,

"You think we could make it to the bed next time?"

"Prolly not" she kissed his hot skin

"What are you doing on Saturday?" his hand trying to lace with hers.

"Depends in the wee hours I plan on sleeping, then work till 3, then going to getting groceries I'm down to peanut butter and jam, then maybe a little sex, after that more sleep"

"PB and J sandwiches are good"

"They are, just not every meal. Why?"

"I wanted you to meet my family" her head shot up

"Why?"  
"I don't know, I just want them to know you and maybe love you like I do, well not maybe the way I do cause that would be kinda weird"

"Just a little" already thinking of ways how to get out of it

* * *

"So will you come with me Saturday?" he got up and took the pizza box to her kitchen and placed it on the counter, she followed him drink in hand.

"Do I have a choice?" he'd never seen her nervous before and he kinda liked it.

"No" he smiled liking how he had the control over her at least for the moment.

"Do I need to know anything about her, so I don't make a complete ass of myself?"

"Nah, she's pretty laid back," he laughed inside his head; he had her where he wanted her. It wasn't long before she gave in, if she hadn't already, he could see the motors turning in that pretty little head of hers. He couldn't wait to see what excuse she would use to get out of it.

* * *

Both came in within seconds of each both with their cell phones attached to their ears, Bosco coming in first talking to of course his Ritza.

"How about I come by on lunch?" he asks as he walks up the stairs, Ashley comes in looking annoyed but happy

"Ya" her eyes glancing everywhere "Ummhmmm" she holds the phone away from ear and places it back "Yep. Hayden I gotta go, I'm inside now Ok Bye" she's already up the stairs and didn't even realize it. She pushes open the door, letting the chaotic noise wash over her.

She said her hello's as she made her way over to the locker, not really thinking about the task, more about how her and Bosco would react around each other today, she was snapped back to reality when a card flew out at her, dropping to the ground. Her name scribbled in a familiar scrawl across the front; she opened it, not seeing Bosco looking at her. She pulled the card and looked confused. An anniversary card. Since when was she married? That ended a long time ago. She opened the card once again seeing the familiar scrawl. No short and sweet little verse just his writing.

_I'm surprised that you've put up with me for this long. _

_Happy Five Years._

_Bubble Man_

She couldn't help but laugh, had it really been that long? Time flies when your having fun, she laughed again, she wouldn't call it fun, she'd call it entertaining, ahh this meant that she had to get him a card or a little present too, why couldn't he forget this anniversary like most men did? A minor detail, she could get it during lunch. She looked up finding him standing beside her locker.

"Why did you remember this?"

"Meh, it just popped in my head on the way here"

"So I have to remember you birthday don't I?"

"Yes" he said in a rather girlish tone, "If I can remember this lil' 'ole thing, the least you can do is remember my birthday"

"You have to remember mine then"

"Ahh" he did a flick of the wrist; that males sometimes did when they were impersonating someone who swung the other way, she didn't know why everything he did made her laugh, so far anyways.

"Leave me alone I have to get changed" she pushed him away, he left. She put the card in her locker and started to change.

"I asked her to meet my Ma" he was glad that he could they were talking again, he had so much to tell her, to fill her in, those few minutes yesterday weren't nearly enough.

He noticed the shift in her attitude, how the hell could he have been so stupid, she was disappointed that he never brought her around to meet his mother, what was he on the day he told her that Monroe, his partner had meet his mother, he'd been with Ash longer, open mouth, insert mouth. He'd take her to meet his mother soon.

"What'd she say?"

"She hasn't agreed but she hasn't said no either, but I know she'll come up with some excuse why she can't come"

"Can you blame her?"

'What's that supposed to mean?"

"You two just got back together and your throwing meeting your mother in her face, it screams commitment that your ready to take the next step and she may not be ready for it"

"I take it your speaking from experience"

"You could say that"

"Does Hayden want you to meet his parents?"

"Ya"

"I see" was she trying to tell him something that she couldn't tell Hayden? He didn't dwell on it too long before they got a call, the adrenaline started pumping through his veins as he flipped on the sirens and away they went.

* * *

4 dispute, 2 possession and 1 break and enter later, it was finally lunch time, Ashley happily dropped him off at Cruz's place and headed towards the drug store up the street, she knew exactly where they were. She walked to the back of the store and grabbed the biggest box and then made her way over the card selection, having picked out a cute, humorous one she grabbed a bag of chips on her way to the cashier.

The horny, zit faced teenager gave her the once over when he saw what she was buying, but kept to himself. She paid and left, walking down the street she wondered if they would get called off their meal break, it had been a while since they actually got a full meal break. She signed the card and stuck it in the box so it stuck half out, and placed them back in the bag, she then leaned against the car as she dug into her chips. Knowing that this was all she was going to get for lunch today. She lost her train of thought when her radio balked out orders.

"79 Victor we're going to have to pull you off your meal break, a 10-20 (assault) in progress on Hancock and Ralph" SHIT!

"10-4 Central Hancock and Ralph" She quickly went up the steps two at a time, she didn't know what apartment number Cruz was in but solved that by looking at the names and her journey began.

She knocked on the door, no response. She knocked harder and louder this time, still no response. Her fingers closed over the cold brass as she turned the knob, it gave way allowing her, her first glimpse of the Sgt's living quarters, she kept her gaze low, not wanting to see anything. The living room and kitchen were clear, that left only two places left, the bathroom and the bedroom. A quick look in the bathroom proved that the bedroom was where they were. She heard a big thud and rushed towards the door, her gaze swept up before she could stop it and she saw everything. Everything, she saw Bosco's scar on his hip he'd gotten from stab wound about a year ago and she saw Cruz's naked backside as they climbed higher and higher to ecstasy.

She managed to keep her voice calm, like she saw this kind of thing everyday that was farthest from the truth.

"Bosco we gotta in progress call"

"We're on our lunch break" she kept her gaze down, not wanting to see anymore.

"Now we're not hurry up and finish" that said she shot out of there like a bat out of hell. She didn't stop until she was inside the car, with it running. She knew he was going to bring up what she saw, but why she wasn't a teenager it wasn't like she was a virgin seeing it for the first time, she was a grown woman who had, had her share of encounters of that sort.

"About what you saw"

"I saw nothing" she jumped in too quickly telling him that she had seen something but wanted to let on she didn't.

The conversation ended there, for a while until he got antsy and pulled the drugstore bag from under him.

"What's this?"

"Your present and my lunch" he opened the bag to reveal a box of condoms and a crumpled bag of chips

"I see I was a little late though" glad that they had arrived at the scene; she got out of the car.

* * *

The perp had been long gone, when they arrived, the EMS already treating the victim, nothing to serious just some scraps and bruises, her pride and self respect probably was the things that hurt the most. Another hour and shift was done, he would be free to do what ever he wanted and that included picking up where he left off two hours ago. He looked down at the paper work he was doing and the letters swam together, creating a jumbled mess. That was a sign for him he stashed it away, he'd finish it tomorrow. He made it to the doorway before he was caught.

"Did you finish your paperwork?" Ashley walked right by him and picked up the paper he thought did a good job of hiding. She read it over shaking her head.

"Somebody didn't finish their work. That's a no no" she shook her finger at him.

"I'll wait around for you if you want me too" that's one of the reason's why he stopped, too quiet

"Sure why not" he took his seat he had just vacated moments before and began working again, she stood and walked around.

"I asked Ritza to meet my mom" her teasing mood dropped quickly changing into anger bringing the room temperature along for the ride.

"What'd she say?"

"She didn't say much but I think she's going to try to get out it" she crossed her arms, a self-detachment move she'd learned long ago.

"Can you blame her? You two just back together and you're already pushing that she meets your mom. That's saying that your ready to take the relationship to the next level, to make a commitment" she looked around the room, looking for something she could busy herself with. Finding nothing she remained where she was far away from him distancing herself from him physically and emotionally.

He figured that her words weren't only meant to defend Ritza but to defend herself too, he didn't know how the relationship between her and Hayden were going, and right now he knew better to ask. He clicked into why the atmosphere of the room along with her mood changed. She hadn't met his mother, and she was jealous, that Ritza would meet her before her. Why the hell did he have to tell her about Nardno? Every detail to be truthful, even the part where his Ma had meet Monroe when he stopped by one day. Dammit. Open mouth, insert mouth.

"I take it Hayden also asked you to meet his parents?" he moved on to the next part of the report.

"What gave you that idea?" She snapped out.

"Lucky Guess is all" she knew he didn't believe in luck, hell neither did she, they'd both been dealt some pretty messed up hands with no chance of winning.

To most people that would drag them down, finding nothing to live for cause you knew you were just going to screw up but it encouraged him to not turn out like his father, so far he'd done that by not getting seriously involved with anyone until now, and even now he watched what he did. The fear of turning out like his dad consumed him, in everything he did.

"After you little shindig with his parents, you wanna meet me and Maritza for drinks or a late supper?" his new plan racing through his mind. He'd take the pressure off both of them by allowing both Ritza and Ashley to meet Ma at the same time. He loved how his mind worked.

"You're meeting his parents on Saturday right?" he scribbled his name at the bottom of the page and gathered the rest, standing up he looked at her seeing so much that she tried to hide.

_I can see it your eyes you're hurting  
But pain is part of learning who you are  
All these truths can sometimes be deceiving  
When your whole world comes crashing to the ground_

She looked up, tears in her eyes

"My mother called today, right after shift" she was distancing herself from him, not meeting his eyes, and her body language so stiff, so un-human.

"She was letting me know that she had gotten married over the week-end, my sister gave her away" she smiled, trying to convince him that she was ok but trying to believe it herself too.

"I better get home, I need groceries" she turned and tried to walk away

"Hey Ash are you ok?" she smiled at him again, he could see her eyes glistening any second they would wash over and down her cheeks.

"I will be, don't worry about me" she left.

If only he could believe her.

A/N: Undone by Lifehouse


	13. WakeyWakey

I'm just going to go in a different direction for a couple of chapters. Bear with me. I'm going to explore some unknown emotions between Ashley and Bosco just for now, I think, I don't know. Also, I feel like a goof, I put Bosco telling Ashley about his wanting Cruz to meet his Ma twice, I feel like such a ditz. Sorry about that.

P.S. I am soo happy that I finally get to use my all time favourite song Behind Those Eyes by 3 Doors Down. I recommend getting the song. It's AWESOME!

* * *

He knew he should have stopped her the moment he saw her leave with David but a voice in his head told him that she was a big girl and could decide things on her own. But his gut was telling him that he should do something but what? If he went to her, she would think he was a jealous idiot and to mind his own business, which he should be doing, but he felt like he needed to protect her.

Pangs of guilt nagged him if only he hadn't believed her when she said she would be alright, he should have made her talk to him, but no he let her go, only to leave with her ex-husband. The consequences would be world altering.

* * *

She awoke to the rays of the sun shining on her face warming her, she rolled over trying to get away from the bright lights, she dug her head deeper into the pillow. Her eyes shot open, she didn't recognize this scent, it was foreign and it wasn't Hayden's. Next it was her body that shot up, her eyes trying to find something familiar, the sheet fell to her waist, the cool air puckering her nipples giving her the hint that she was naked. Oh god what did I do. She looked around for her clothes, finding everything on the floor she quickly dressed not knowing where she was, the faster she could get out of here the better.

She walked out of the bedroom just as David opened the door, for a second she had thought about grabbing a weapon to protect herself. Upon seeing him, she still wanted to find a weapon, anger boiling inside of her.

"What the hell happened?" her head aching, her mind spinning. A hangover, she didn't remember drinking.

"Don't you remember my love?" what the fuck?

Her cell phone rang breaking the silence, she looked at the caller ID, Hayden, oh shit. How was she going to explain this? If she didn't even know what happened?

She ignored it, she needed time to figure things out.

"Answer Me!" she was just short of panicking

"Well, we slept together for one"

"What else?" she racked her brain trying to find any bit of detail from that night and found nothing.

"Nothin we talked, we drank, we had sex"

Her stomach started churning, she didn't know if she could make it to the bathroom or not

"Where's the bathroom?" she could feel it rising

"Over there" he pointed over her shoulder.

She made it with seconds to spare as her stomach contents filled the toilet

The first thing she did was go to the hospital to get a drug test, because she knew she wouldn't sleep with him again willingly. She wanted to wait until she got the test results back to tell Hayden, she couldn't let it go, he deserved to know. This was going to hurt him big time.

All day she thought about what she was going to tell him, and kept drawing up blanks, finally she decided to just tell him the truth that had to count for something right? At least she hoped it did. Bosco noticed she wasn't her usual self that day, one she allowed him to drive, and didn't mind it when he yelled at the other drivers and two she didn't speak. He figured something went on between David and her but didn't know how to ask it without being nosey. If he told her he'd seen the two, she would bite his head off as to why he didn't stop her. And that was a question he didn't have an answer to.

"Cat got your tongue?" he silently cursed as the vehicle ahead of him slammed on his brakes suddenly.

"No" at least it was something

"Have fun with Hayden last night?"

"No" getting information out of her wasn't going to be easy

"Is No the only word you know?"

"Fuck off Bosco" eww she was pissed now

"No thank you"

"Will you shut up?"

"Nope not until you tell me why your so quiet"

"Promise?"

"Absolutely"

"I slept with David last night" he half expected that, but it still was a shocker

"Willingly?"

"Just waiting on test results" as if knowing what they were talking about her cell rang, he wished she put it on speaker so he could hear to but it was really none of his business. As she was talking he thought about to the conversation they had, where she had told him she only slept with him because she was emotionally distraught, was it the case this time too? It had to be, he knew she would never willingly sleep with David, not after the pain he put her through. She ended the call and remained silent, something told him it wasn't the answer she had hoped for.

"Was that the hospital?"

"Ya" it had been fine when he gave one-worded answers but now, he hated them

"And?"

"No drugs were in my system" she looked out the window, signaling that the conversation was over but he was ready to end it.

"That doesn't mean that he didn't drug you, some are out of your system in hours" she didn't answer him, he knew she wasn't going to talk to him anymore so he remained silent, and he was going to remain silent until the end of shift, knowing that she needed some alone time, even if it killed him.

* * *

He was ready to scream at the top of his lungs by the end of shift, keeping quiet was something he didn't like. Being quiet allowed thoughts you didn't want to think about to creep into your mind. And most of the time that wasn't a good thing. Not with him anyways, they walked into together she still didn't say anything, and Bosco couldn't understand why t bothered him so much to know that she slept with David, she wasn't his girl. She was Hayden's, at least for now. The least he could do was be there when she broke, picking up the pieces, if she would let him.

* * *

"Ashley we need to talk" she would rather have dealt with the devil at this point, in a way he was the Devil.

"No we don't David" she tried to walk on but he grabbed her arm preventing her from moving

"Yes we do" he still had a hold of her arm, his fingers painfully digging into her flesh. She spun around to face him, causing his fingers to dig in even more

"Let go of me" she looked at him silently telling him she meat business

"We need to talk"

"It was a mistake, I don't know why I did but I did, it will never happen again. Let GO" the change in her voice made a few people look their way.

"I believe she said let her go twice now" thank god for Bosco

"This doesn't concern you" David spoke grimly. He dug his fingers in even deeper, making her wince from the pain

Bosco put his hand on David's wrist and squeezed pulling his hand of Ashley

"Leave her alone"

"Why are you always protecting her? You in love with her or something?"

"Or Something" his anger vibrating from him, and into his words

"Don't come near her again" she had enough and walked away she couldn't handle it. She was with Hayden but why did she feel something when Bosco stood up for her? Something that she had never felt before.

* * *

This wasn't going to be easy, she had done nothing but pace since she got home, her mind not staying on one thought for more than seconds. She knew Hayden would never forgive her, not this time. It was fun while it lasted though. She tried to keep her cool when he called earlier and told him he needed to come over. She didn't tell him why.

She opened her door after she heard the knock, seeing his face light up when he saw her made her want to cry. She never meant for this to happen, but there was no turning back it did happen. And now she had to suffer the consequences.

"I've got something to say and it would help if you didn't interrupt me until I was done"

"oook" he wasn't exactly sure what she needed to tell him, but he knew it wasn't good the last time she said they needed to talk, she broke up with him. He didn't think he could handle it if she did it this time.

"There's something that you should know" tears spilled over and down her cheeks this becoming harder every second she dragged it on.

"Hey what's wrong?" he stepped closer wiping the tears away from her

"I did something that I shouldn't have done and I don't know why I did it but I do know that I will never do it again"

_You said I got something to say  
__Then you got that look in your eye  
__There is something that you gotta know  
__You said as you started to cry  
__I've been done the wrong road tonight  
__And I swear Ill never go there again  
__I've seen this face once before  
__And I don't think I can go there again_

"Ok can you tell me what it is?" he saw it in her eyes, something that he swore he wouldn't go through again, not after Sherry, not after she cheated.

_There's something I cant see  
__Something different in the way you smile  
__Behind those eyes you lie  
__And there's nothing I can say  
__Cause I'm never gonna change your mind  
__Behind those eyes you hide_

"I really don't know why I did it, I'm not blaming anything except my judgment, my poor judgment. I don't know all the details but I slept with David" she walked away from him knowing that he wouldn't want to touch her.

_As you turned to walk away  
__I saw another look in your eye  
__And even though it hurt like it did  
__I couldn't let this be a goodbye_

"Can I ask what made you go to David in the first place? Wasn't I good enough?"

"I'm sorry, he was just there and I don't know I was upset and I just went with him"

_You say that you're sorry  
__And you say that it hurts you the same  
__Is there something here to believe?  
__Or is it just another part of the game?_

"What made you so upset?" she looked at him and for the first time she allowed for him to see something other than anger in her eyes, hurt, regret and embarrassment. But as soon as he saw them they were gone

_There's something I cant see  
__Something different in the way you smile  
__Behind those eyes you lie  
__And there's nothing I can say  
__Cause I'm never gonna change your mind  
__Behind those eyes you hide_

"My mother called to tell me she gotten married over the week-end, she explained it was last minute and she let it slip, meaning she meant to let it slip that my sister gave her away. I know I shouldn't feel left out, but I did, I wanted to be a part of it even though I wanted nothing to do with them"

Why couldn't she have just stayed alone? It would have been better. A lot less heartache and pain. The silence always scared her that meant her father had beaten one of them unconscious if no more screams could be heard.

"Please say something" she could understand if he never wanted to see her again or talk to her, she didn't want to let things go sour between them, not like this. Her tears were slowly drenching her shirt but she didn't bother to wipe them away. She let them fall.

"What do you want me to say? That it's alright, I forgive you? I cant do that"

"I know and I know that you probably never want to see me again, I can accept that but not before you know that I was starting to fall in love with you" she speed walked to her bedroom quickly shutting the door before she did something stupid. She fell against the door, never before feeling like her heart had been ripped out seeing him like this. She never came back out until morning; relieved he was gone by morning when she made the phone call to work saying she wouldn't be in today, a first for her.

She didn't bother doing any of her morning rituals she just sat down on her couch.

Something was bothering Cruz he was sure of it, he just couldn't place what it was, it could have been about Saturday but he sensed it wasn't that. She hadn't said two words to him since he'd woken up, and that was unusual, she would be biting his ear off, or licking it for that matter. But she did neither today. He actually got up the balls to ask her and she said she had things on her mind. Something big if she was ignoring him. Oh well.

He walked in by himself, Cruz saying she needed to be here earlier for something, he couldn't remember.

Ryans' called in sick today" the desk Sgt told him as he walked past him, great just great, he needed to talk to her and of all days to take a sick day, which she'd never done before so he was a little curious as to why she would call in sick. That was going to have to wait.

He was coming down the stairs when he knew why she called in sick, Hayden came in looking like shit, he'd only seen him one other time like that and well, they'd gotten into a fight over that. Ashley what the hell did you do? She told him. Hayden saw him but didn't say anything and went upstairs to Anti-Crime, something that shouldn't have worried him but it did.


	14. Guess Who?

A/N: All I'm saying is how wide my range of music is, it's actually quite shocking but meh.. This chapter I am doing a bit of country an old favourite of mine That Summer by Garth Brooks. I also love The Thunder Rolls by him but it doesn't fit. Oh well…Also a bit more dialogue in this. It was easier than describing feelings. Although more emotions felt during the last little bit and a character that hasn't been around in a while Faith makes an appearance! I would like to kill her off but I'm not that mean…. Ok I am but it doesn't mean I will.

"Bosco, we need to talk" why did women always use those words to break up with. Why couldn't they just say that they didn't want to see them anymore instead of going into this long complicated problem about how its not working and ending up saying its not you its me. He knew how it worked he said the speech many times himself; he just wasn't prepared when she used it on him. He sat there stunned that she was actually breaking it off with him, saying it wasn't working for her.

He wanted to scream, laugh, and shout all at the same time. He guessed you got what you dished out. And she did it in the precinct no less; of all the places to break up with a person you do it at the place you both work at. The day had quickly gone down hill from there, he'd been partnered with David and it took all his will power not to reach over and deck him one. Then he someone clipped him in an intersection, making him spend hours filling out an accident report, today was definitely not his day.

He grabbed a pizza on his way to Ashley's house figuring she really wasn't sick. He knocked once, twice, still no answer.

"Ash answer the door I know you're in there" he heard movement then the door opened. He was taken back when he saw her, her hair stuck out at all ends, her cheeks rosy, her eyes puffy and red, and she hadn't gotten dressed. He showed her the pizza

"A peace offering" and held up the six-pack of beer, wondering if that was going to be enough.

She gripped her door, so hard her knuckles turned white, still deciding if she was going to let him in or not. What could it hurt? She moved back still holding the door, and he quickly went in before she changed her mind. He wasn't going to quiz her, if she wanted to tell him, that was up to her. In the meantime he could talk to her about his problems. It was funny how he came over to make sure she was all right but was going to end up talking about himself.

"So Ritza dumped me this morning" he started. He looked over to the real reason why he was here. She wasn't paying attention, deep in thought she stared at her beer can, it wasn't going exactly how he planned it, he just would have to roll with the punches.

"She said that she didn't feel the same anymore, I guess I can't blame her though, too much time has passed between us"

"That's great" she continued to stare at the beer can, he couldn't stand it any longer.

"So You told Hayden about you and David didn't you?"

"Thank you captain obvious" her voice bitter

"Glad I could help. You know what I do when my life is shit?"

"Annoy people?"

"No I focus on something else"

"Oh ya and what the hell do you propose?"

_Both needing something from each other  
Not yet knowing what that might be_

"I don't think I like your attitude"

"No one said you had to stay"

"Get used to it, I'm back"

"Can't you stay with your mother?"

"No"

"Just don't use all my bubble bath like last time"

"No promises"

"Go buy your own. Did you ever think of that?"

"And get it for free? I don't think so" her face started to ease, he was breaking down her walls, she had so carefully put up.

"You're an idiot" she grabbed for a slice of pizza slowly chewing on the piece

"Glad I'm not the only one who realized that. Whew that's a weight of my chest"

"A full pledged idiot"

"How'd you know I took a pledge about a year ago something about it being top-secret"

"Well it aint so secret anymore now is it?" she grabbed another slice and soon devoured that one. A loud crack of thunder filled the silence, she saw him jump but said nothing. A flash of lightning and more thunder soon followed.

"What do you suppose we do to get our minds off of things?"

"Go to the movies?"

"I don't feel like getting soaked"

"Ok who said we couldn't bring the movies to us? What movies do you have?" Already heading over to the shelf with the dvd's on them,

"Well I'm choosing how about you go make the popcorn?"

"We just ate" how could he be hungry he ate three quarters of the pizza

"So" she shook her head and went into the kitchen to make the popcorn. She returned minutes later with a big bowl of popcorn the aroma soon filling her living room, her mouth watered just thinking of what it tasted like and she snuck a few before he saw, or so she thought.

"And your the one who didn't want popcorn" she was caught red handed

"Don't bug me. What did you pick out?" he held up a case,

"Good choice" she sat down beside him and the movie got under way. Ever so often she would glance at him, silently thanking him of getting her mind of things. The movie ended and he was singing by the end.

"Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do when they come for you"

"Don't quit your day job"

"I can sing quite good"

"Ya keep telling yourself that"

"I could always convince you" he started tickling her side, she started to laugh uncontrollably squirming to get away from him, she almost managed but he reached forward to far and fell on top of her. His fingers stopped, and the laughter died.

_There was a difference in her laughter  
__There was a softness in her eye  
__And in the air there was a hunger  
__Even a boy could recognize_

_She had a need to feel the thunder  
__To chase the lightning from the sky  
__To watch a storm with all its wonder  
__Raging in her lover's eyes  
__She hadto ride the heat of passion  
__Like a comet burning bright  
__Rushing headlong in the wind  
__Now where only dreams have been  
__Burning both ends of the night_

There eyes meet, neither saying anything as they stared and soon his lips moved in closer to her already moving lips. Their lips brushed gently the first time and more rough the next time. She turned her head

"I'm not looking for another relationship"

"I'm not either" he brought her face back to his with a touch of his finger. And lowered his lips again.

* * *

She knew they shouldn't have done what they did, but somehow it felt right like a warm blanket on a cold night. She tried her hardest to avoid him but that was kinda hard considering he lived with her, and they were partners she had escaped him for the being him mentioning he had some personal business to attend to.

"Hey Ashley" there's a voice she hadn't heard in quite a while and she wasn't happy about it either

"Detective" she slowly turned around her eyes refused to go any lower, she didn't know if she was showing yet. If she was, she knew her gaze would settle on her stomach and not move from there. She tried to keep the conversation light.

"Oh come on we know each other you can call me Faith"

"Ok, Faith, how've you been?" she really didn't care it, but it was the polite thing to say.

"I could live without the morning sickness, but other than that ok. You?" she wanted nothing more then to end this conversation but she replied.

"I can't complain" she finally allowed herself to look down and saw a little bump.

"When are you due?" she asked in a voice that she didn't recognize as her own

"Early September, I can't wait"

"Congratulations"

A twenty something girl walked up and stood beside Faith

"Ashley I would like you to meet my daughter Emily"

"We really need to go if you want me to go, my class starts in a hour"

"What are you studying to be?"

"Right now a paramedic but maybe in a couple years a doctor"

"Any specific area you want to study medicine?"

"I was thinking pediatrics or OB"

"I think you would make a great doctor"

"Mom thinks so too" Emily really wasn't that bad, she had a feeling Emily didn't know the whole story of what went on. She wasn't like her mother that's for sure.

Bosco came out of the locker room and started calling her when she didn't answer the first few times he started yelling.

"ASHLEY, ASHLEY!"

"Duty calls, or in this case an idiot calls. It was nice meeting you Emily"

"You too" they walked away as she did too in following the yelling. She walked up behind him and smacked him across the head.

"Hey" he smoothed down his hair, trying to see if there were any bumps left

"Next time trying looking for me or getting the Sgt to page me" she walked off, shaking her head as she went.

She let him drive again, saying something about how she didn't want to. He didn't know how they were going to deal with what happened last night, if they were going to keep doing what they were doing, or it was just another one time deal. He wanted to keep it going, see where it led them. He reached his arm out and placed his hand on the inside of her thigh. She let it rest there for a few seconds before she took a hold of his wrist and took his hand off her.

"We're at work"

"No one will know"

"No"

And so it began she was cold and distant when they were working, acting normal, but once they closed the doors to her apartment she melted in his arms, begging him for more and more often than not he did the begging too.

"On Saturday I'm taking you to meet my Ma" no she didn't want this that would mean they were in a relationship and she wasn't prepared for that, she got hurt when she was in a relationship so it was better if it was nothing more than casual sex.

"I don't think that's a good idea"

"Why not?"

"Just no" she had an urge to get out of the RMP and walk the rest of the way.

"Just because we are together doesn't mean we have to be together you follow?"

"A little too well" he was mad

"Are mad at me?" knowing he would say he wasn't

"No"

"Yes you are"

"Then why ask if you already know I am?"

"Just waiting to see if you will actually tell me when you're mad at me"

"I am mad at you satisfied?"

"Absolutely" she said hoping he caught the double meaning to that

"I don't get it, you were mad that I hadn't taken you to meet Ma and now that I'm asking your saying no? Women!"

"Cant live with 'em, cant live without em"

That's for sure"

He was starting to get on her nerves, seeing him all the time, the sex was great, so was their work its just she saw him do everything except go to the bathroom. But that was only partly a lie cause she'd been in the shower with him occasionally. She knew all his secrets that you weren't supposed to know when you were involved with someone like how they did their laundry, how they washed their dishes, where they put their dirty dishes and she knew everything. He let himself run out of laundry so she would offer to do it, so she now gathered his up with hers; she did the dishes and picked up after him. He did however made sure her place was vacuumed, and smelled nice. It wasn't as if he was a complete slob he just had trouble picking up after himself. She'd taken an extra shift, just needing to get away from him for awhile.

She traded with Cortez on the afternoon shift, so Bosco was partnered with someone else then she took the afternoon and then the boss was looking for volunteers for on graveyard cause a few were out sick she took it without even thinking, she got to meet new people both on and off the streets. She got partnered with guy who been on for 20 years or so, making him look like a father figure, he had been quite a pleasure to work with. Within an hour with him, she felt like she had known him all her life. She was thinking of maybe taking a few night shifts if she could be partnered with him.

After that shift she didn't feel like going home just yet so she stopped by the groceries, she saw some pretty good looking guys in there, wondering what the hell they were doing up so early in the morning, it was New York City she didn't need an answer as to why they were up so early they were probably thinking the same about her. Who cared?

An hour, 150 dollars and a cart full later she was on her way, she would never let herself get down the bare necessities again, well she had two people to feed now, which reminded her Bosco owed her for half. She'd have to make a trip to the gym, she hadn't exercised in a while, she was getting a lot of sex at the moment but that wasn't enough, on cue her stomach growled reminding her that she hadn't, had anything since she found the lost cookies in the back of her locker around midnight last night. She pulled into a coffee shop and was munching on a muffin within minutes as she was driving to her place.

The groceries put away, her ready for bed, her breakfast eaten and her coffee drunk, she finally slipped into bed beside Bosco around nine. Bosco rolled over snuggled into his pillow more

"What time is it?" half it was muffled by his pillow

"Early" she closed her eyes and within minutes she was asleep.

She felt like she had only shut her eyes minutes ago when knocking on the door, slowly pulled her from dream world. The knocking wouldn't stop so she was forced t get up to make it go away. Bosco wasn't going o get up to answer it. She opened the door to find someone she hadn't seen in a long time.

"Hello Ashley"

"Hello Mother"


	15. What happens after you die?

**_A/N: _**A lot of thoughts were running through my head, about alternate reality 's and such. My cousin was killed on Saturday (July 9th) her and i were close so it really made me think. Sorry it took so long to update but while had other things on my mind. Hopefully other haptes will be up soon.

_**Little** **Recap**_

_She felt like she had only shut her eyes minutes ago when knocking on the door, slowly pulled her from dream world. The knocking wouldn't stop so she was forced t get up to make it go away. Bosco wasn't going o get up to answer it. She opened the door to find someone she hadn't seen in a long time._

_"Hello Ashley"_

_"Hello Mother"_

**10 Seconds Later**

"What are you doing here?" her mother looked high but she couldn't say for sure, her husband stood off to her side, wearing a business suit, at least her mother had done something right in her life for once, married into money.

"We need to talk" she now hated those words, heard them to many times, she knew she wasn't going to get rid of her unless they talked so she stepped back, to open the door. She glanced down and realized what she was wearing one of Bosco's shrts and pajama's pants, she just woke up for goodness sake.

"Can I get you two anything to drink?" they looked at each other, her mother's eyes were glistened and she knew the news wasn't good.

"No" her mother and her husband had sat on the couch leaving her to take the chair, she sat waiting for the news, explanations whirling around her head.

"Late last night you sister was in a car accident and she didn't make it" her sister as dead? How come they didn't get the call, was it out of her range?

"Where?"

"She was on Ralph heading home" her sister's house was just out of her range. They wouldn't have gotten the call anyways.

"What happened?" the news still not sinking in, still thinking that she was going to wake up any second now. She stared at her mother, waiting for her to stay ok Ashley time to wake up now. Or ha ha fooled you, she's safe and alive at home with her husband and kids. The moment didn't come.

"A car ran a red light t-boning yours sister, making her go into run into a transport truck head on" You don't make it out alive if you hit a transport, your car becomes nothing more than a big piece of metal with you in it. You were lucky that you died instantly so you didn't know what happened. She was glad that she didn't suffer.

"When is the funeral?" she hadn't cried in front of her mother since she was seven and didn't plan to start again. She swallowed, her mouth dry, she needed a drink.

"Do you mind if I had a drink?" and she wasn't talking about water either.

Her mother shook her head no, she almost ran to the kitechen and down the liquid in record time.

Bosco stood with his head against the door, he didn't know how Ashley was feeling from all of this, when he lost his brother he felt like screaming and kicking and hiting things, but he drank until he forgot who his brother was and even who he was. He also forgotten how he gotten home and that scared the shit out of him so much, he never got that drunk again. He knew what she was doing and he wanted nothing more than to comfort her but he knew he had to stay in her bedroom and wait for her mother and step father to leave. He would only complicate things if he went out in only boxers, even dressed would make things even worse. So he stayed put, putting what he wanted to say to her together that way he wouldn't have to have any awkward silences. The more he thought of things the more the words didn't seem right. The talking was quieter and he couldn't quite make it out, so he got dressed. He tried to look between the door, but proved that wasn't a smart idea when she opened the bedroom door hitting him in the head.

"Oww" he was bent over holding his head.

"Are you ok?" She rushed to him, trying to see his head, he was whining like a big baby. She pushed him on the bed and removed his hand from his wound, nothing too serious just a little bump. She ran her thumb over the bump and he winced

"Does it hurt?"

"Yes" she kissed it and he didn't wince, so she kissed his eyebrow, then his eye, his cheeks then the corner of his mouth then his lips. His hands went to her waist slowly making their way up under her shirt.

* * *

She watched him sleeping, knowing she didn't have a lot of time before he had to wake up and they would go to work, she just wondered how they got to be how they were, was it pre destined from birth or did you create a personality giving your surroundings? Was life all predestined? Did you deep down know which decision to make, which way to turn, how to react to situations, everything. How did you really know what to do? She watched him sleep his face lost in a dream. She wondered what he was dreaming of. Was it good or bad? She brushed hair out of his eyes, she didn't know if he knew or not, the walls were pretty thin around here. So she guessed he did, that's why she hit him in the head earlier, nothing remained of that incident, the swelling had gone down and the colour returned to normal. She wasn't going to cry she told her self. Sure her sister was dead but what was she to do? Cry? Scream? Shout? Beg for something to change when it couldn't? 

How were her niece and nephew doing, they may be too young to understand what was going on they were only 7 and 9 what about Robert her husband? How was he holding up? She'd go over and see if there was anything that she could do to help ease the pain.

She stood in front of the bathroom mirror looking at the reflection, pondering the idea of another universe where the dead went on living as if they had never died but how would they go on without thinking about where their families were? What if they lived in only memories ,the good ones that kept replaying over and over again. She wanted to know but wasn't going to cause anything to find out. She jumped when he places his hands on her bare shoulders. She looked in the mirror seeing him for the first time. She snapped back into reality, he wasn't going to feel sorry for her. She walked out of the bathroom in search of clean clothes.

The day seemed to drag on forever, a slow day. Or maybe it was to her, the hours seemed to drag on but they were finally done and she took her own car today, she was going to see her brother in law and niece and nephew. She hadn't seen either in a couple years, so this was going to be weird and awkward. She knocked on the door, the street seemed abnormally quiet for the time being, with only a slight breeze taking off the steady rising heat. The weather man said it was going to be close to 90 degrees out and it was probably hotter, she glanced around and saw the heat coming off the pavement. She could feel the sweat starting to run down her back, why wouldn't they answer. She knocked again still hearing nothing, she walked around to the garage, Robert's vehicle was in the drive way, so she continued around the back. Nothing, where were they? She looked in back door, she only saw darkness, she knocked on the door, still nothing, dread pooled in her stomach, something was definitely wrong.

She put her elbow through the glass, no alarm sounded, which was unusual. She put her hand through the broken window and unlocked the door. She felt like she was in a horror movie, where something was waiting for her around every corner. She knew better than to call out, that gave away her position, she should call for backup but that would only alert the person who was in here. Ever since she'd been partnered with Bosco, she carried an off duty piece around her ankle. Thankful for it now, she bent down and pulled it out of his holder. She took the safety off, praying she wouldn't have to use it.

She started to go up the stairs sticking to the wall side, knowing that the middle of the stair were the most used, so the sides wouldn't creak. She made it to the master bedroom first, it was neat and tidy. She moved on to her niece's room, she wasn't prepared with what she saw, both Rachael and Nathan were huddled into a corner, their father in front of them holding a gun.

"Please daddy no" she saw the pool of blood between them. Whoever had lost that much blood, was lucky to be alive barely hanging on, she saw Nathan's limp body, behind Rachael he needed help now if it wasn't already too late. Rachael looked her way, and Ashley shook her head no, hoping Rachael wouldn't give away her position. Too late, Robert had noticed what she was staring at and turned around.

"Robert put the gun down" he pointed the gun at her, adrenaline rushing through her veins.

"No, they have to die just like their mother" if she'd learned anything from her training it's to keep the gunman talking and the gun pointed away from anyone but yourself. Also keep using their names, they hated that.

"Why Robert?"

"They were the reasons she was leaving" he wasn't wel she could see it in the way he was standing, he needed some serious help

"No daddy" he positioned himself so he could keep the gun on both of them. Not good.

"What did they do Robert that made her leave?" her eyes focused on the gun.

"She didn't want them to hear us fight anymore" he kept waving the gun around, she was afraid that he would pull the trigger accidentally. Injuring one of them. The blow could be deadly

"What were you fighting about Robert?" her gazed moving from the gun to him,

"That's personal"

"Robert, I cant help you if you don't tell me" his face went out of this world to a death stare, she'd said the wrong words.

"We don't need help, thank you for stopping by" he grabbed Rachael by the arm and dragged him in front of him. Narrowing her odds if she had to shoot him. He knew that that's why he bent down, so Rachael's body shielded his. She had to time it perfectly, knowing that it was the only way he would have to die so she could get help. She didn't like silence it allowed the emptiness to settle in, it was now or never Nathan would needed help now if he was still alive. She didn't know if Rachael knew what she was going to do but, within a second Rachael pulled all her weight down giving her the shot she needed and she took it, it hit him right between the eyes. He collapsed instantly, take Rachael with him, she quickly pulled off his arm allowing Rachael to get up and went over to Nathan. She checked for a pulse. It was barely three, there was no time to call for a bus. She would have to take him herself, the first task at hand was getting him to wake up.

"Rachael go grab me as many towels as you can, the biggest you can find"

"Ok" she took off

Ashley picked up the boy carefully, wrapping him in the towels Rachael brought her, Rachael ran ahead of her to open the door, for her, Rachael climbed in, she couldn't get over how calm Rachael was behaving, her insides were a mess. She stayed calm on the outside for Rachael and so far it had worked. She laid him down in the back, Rachael began talking to him about the things she's done even though, he'd already heard them. She wished she was in a cop car, that way she could speed and everyone would get out of her way, but so far the traffic had been good.

She watched form the window as the doctors worked on him, he had to be ok, she didn't think she could forgive herself if he wasn't. Rachael was clinging to her side. Reality dawned on her she needed to make a few calls, one to her mother, one to his mother, and one to the authorities. There was a dead man in a house that could be broken into from her breaking the window.

Everything was taken care of, both mother's called, the authorities alerted and Nathan was in surgery, the bullet had bounced off his rib and was situated somewhere inside his body. She hadn't really paid attention after the doctor's said he was going to be ok. She felt like she should stay and wait but she wanted to get away from it all. That wasn't the right thing to do, she battled the rotten coffee the hospital brewed even, attempted to eat something with Rachael but her stomach churned, everyone looked at her weird because she had dried blood on her shirt. Nathan's blood and a little of Robert's blood spatter on her face, but she had wiped that off long ago. She wasn't going to allow herself to grieve her sister wouldn't want that, somehow since that little episode she had with Robert earlier, that her death wasn't an accident. She just had to prove that somehow Robert staged it to look like an accident, she'd start the first time she got a chance, a couple of people owed her a few favors.

She had to think what way to start she just couldn't do one thing and go one way she had to go both. She'd look at the accident report, then go from there. Meaning that she would have to go to the 40th precinct and bribe someone to allow her to look at it, shouldn't be too hard she was a fellow cop, but she was the deceased sister. Some problems she definitely had to deal with. Maybe the later in the night she went the better because by around midnight everyone was a bit tired even having coming on shift an hour before. She said her goodbyes and her mother promised that she would call the moment, she knew anything, which actually made her think that her mother wasn't as bad as she thought she was. But then thought otherwise again, it was just one of her mother plays to get the hospital staff to think they everything was ok. Just to be sure she gave the nurse to call her with any updates. She didn't feel like driving, didn't think she had it in her, so she walked the streets, thankful that they had given back her off duty. They shouldn't have so quickly but hey she knew the officer that took it, she promised that she would return it first thing in the morning.

She needed to clear her head, she made her way to the park she went the night she met Hayden, a lot of things had changed since then and she was responsible for them. No one said it to her face but she was the reason why Cruz got shot, and she knew without a doubt she was the reason why Hayden left her, she had slept with David, her ex-husband for god's sake. Why was she good at alienating people?

"Because your afraid that someone will see the real you" what the fuck? She glanced beside her, a face she didn't expect to see, and she guessed she had spoken that last thought out loud.

"Come here often?" he stood beside her waiting for her reply

"No. What about you?"

"I come here when ever I'm stuck on a case"

"It seems I come here when I'm depressed"

"Really what are you depressed about?" he hoped she said because they weren't together because that's all he could think about

"My sister died last night and I had to kill my brother in law so his son wouldn't die"

"Ouch seems like you've had a bad day"

"It's a pretty normal day actually" she wasn't going to cry she said over and over. He couldn't see her if she did it was to dark out, the moon was playing hide and seek with the clouds.

"It's not everyday that you lose a sister"

"I lost her a long time ago" he didn't ask, she didn't elaborate

How many people knew that they were sisters? Did her friends even know she had a sister, a black sheep of the family? She would soon find out, when she went through with the funeral. Her friends would come or did she even have any? She felt something cold and smooth being placed in her hand, she didn't have to know what it was or what it meant, he wanted to know her thoughts.

"Just thinking about what needs to be done" she saw him nod

"You shouldn't do all this alone"

"Oh I'm not my mother probably is" he placed his arm around her shoulder and squeezed pulling her to him sideways, he kissed the top of her head

"I'm really a sorry for your loss"

"Ya me too" she rested her head on his shoulder and stood there for hours.


	16. Friends

A/n: Really emotional day for me, funeral for my cousin happened today July 13. Her brother chose two songs that she liked and played them, never listen to them again without thinking about her. My Immortal and Break Away. Anyways to get to the real point of why I'm doing this I added everyone's pov in here because it helps me set up the love triangles. I apologize about the song Not Again by Chris Cummings because I cant find any lyrics to it, so I tried my best. Happy reading!

* * *

"If you need anything just let me know ok?" they stopped at her door and she looked down, at least she didn't look him in the eye

"I will" he knew she wouldn't, she brought her face up with a finger to her chin

"Don't say you will when you won't" she nodded not sure what to say anymore

"I will call you"

"Anytime doesn't matter if it's three am or ten o'clock in the morning kay?"

"You may get tired of me after a while" he smiled and placed a hand in her hand smoothing it down

"Never" she smiled back and he hand went to a finger and traced her jaw, the moment grew awkward again, so she put her keys in the lock

"Well I better try to get some sleep"

"Ya me too. Remember call me anytime"

"Okay" she unlocked her door, he turned to leave

"Wait" he stopped and turned around facing her, she placed her hand on his arm and leaned in kissing him on the cheek.

"Thanks" she put her hand on her doorknob, the air around them ahad definitely gotten hotter. He grinned and left.

* * *

She was ready for Bosco this time, but she didn't know how long she could stand with him and not break down and cry.

"And where have you-are you hurt?" he was staring at her chest, she'd forgotten the blood.

"It's not mine"

"Then who the hell is it?"

"My nephew" she lasted as long as she could she could feel the tears filling her eyes, then she remembered her phone, she'd turned it to vibrate after she left the hospital thinking that the little jolt would alert her but it didn't. She checked her messages.

"You have two new messages"

"Ashley this is your mother calling, Nathan came out of surgery ok, he's going into recovery now. Just thought you should know, I'll call with an update"

"Sent today at 1:35am" she erased it and continued onto the next one

"Ashley it's me Hayden I know we just left each other but I wanted to remind you that you can call me anytime. I'm going to be in court all morning, if I can last that long, not what I used to be and no don't blame yourself, I stayed out because I wanted to. Give me a call" she erased that one too, happy that Hayden was actually talking to her again.

"Don't you have to get to work?" he looked at his watch

"Shit I gotta go. Wait don't you too?" she had to hurry him out of the apartment before she completely broke. Which wouldn't be too long.

"I work the third today"

"What don't wanna partner with me anymore?"

"You're going to be late" it wasn't long maybe even seconds before the damn broke

"We'll finish this talk tonight" he finally left, she waited before she heard the door closing before she went to the bathroom, collapsed against the door and cried.

* * *

He shouldn't feel this way about her, he should want nothing to do with her, never to speak or see her again but something kept pulling him to her. How many times had he picked up the phone to call her only to hang it up again. He'd finally gotten to the point where he picked up the phone once a day, and then he usually called someone else to get his mind off of her. It helped some but not really. He thought about her all the time, he felt like something was wrong he had known her maybe a month and he already fallen hard for him and she hurt him twice. He was sure he was over her last night, but there was something about her that had him wanting to be near her. He'd been hurt before it was nothing new to him Sherry had hurt him pretty well, he was determined not to be burned by cheating after her but here he was. Most women would be on their knees, begging to take them back, she wasn't, and she understood the fact that he didn't want to see her. She stayed away until he came to see her.

_Last word was the last straw  
__I know  
__You put goodbye on top of everything  
__That's counts  
__Back it broke  
__I was over you I swear last night  
__But all I can say in this Morning light_

_Not again  
__Making this mistake once more  
__Not Again  
__I have been here before  
__It only takes a moment  
__One touch of your hand  
__If I was over you  
__I'm not again  
__I'm not again_

_Well you know  
__I only love you sometimes  
__It comes and it goes  
__Yaa it lives and it dies  
__Ohh I have grown too tired to fight  
__So I've start my prayers every night with_

_Not again  
__Making this mistake once more  
__Not Again  
__I have been here before  
__It only takes a moment  
__One touch of your hand  
__If I was over you  
__I'm not again  
__I'm not again

* * *

_

He thought he would catch Ashley in the locker room, where he was changing to go home and she in but he didn't. Nor on the way out. He still hadn't even her from her by the time he went to bed around midnight that night. Why was she acting like this? The more time he spent with her the more his feelings for her grew. He'd been with others just not intimately the way he was with Ashley, she knew more or less everything about him and he knew most things, he knew there were things she left out but he felt that she wasn't ready to tell him that part yet. He wouldn't pry into her life.

He'd almost had the real thing with Nicole but she purposely withheld information from him to protect him, but all it did was hurt him in the end, he was even starting to open up to her and then he learned she had a thing for cops cause her daddy didn't like them. Then their was Cruz, that was just pure animal attraction, no talking, just sex. Then Faith he again started to open up to once again, after he forgave her for ratting him out. Their wasn't much to open up with her, she knew everything already. Ashley it was her turn next, she was her own person, she didn't what others thought of her and she spoke her mind whether or not you wanted to hear it. He had fun with her, they could talk, about anything and he felt like he had accomplished something afterwards. The worry set in when he still hadn't heard from her when he went into work the next day.

* * *

So many people had tried to analyze her, and tried to help her. They didn't understand she didn't want anyone to help her should could do anything on her own, had been doing it for years. She had Lettie but that was only when she wasn't missing and high, even then she felt like she was being ignored. So when she died the feelings didn't change much. She wasn't the one to build personal bridges, never saw the need. There were times when she just wanted to go with friends and have a good time, or talk and listen. But she wasn't the kind of person that had friends, most feared her and the rest just stayed clear of her. She didn't even know who to start with for her to be her friend meaning she would have to start building bridges not burn them or not bother building them at all. But was it really worth it the last time she had started to trust someone she learned that she was being played with. She was willing to try it again one more time if that didn't work out, it'd go back to normal.

"You wanted to see me Sgt?" she glanced up ready to greet the caller

"Two things actually, one would you like to work up here with me and two after we're done, do you want to have drinks with me?" Ashley couldn't believe what she was hearing, the bitch Sgt was asking her to have drinks with her, was it some plot to get Bosco back, because she wasn't be stuck in the middle of them, if they wanted to be together then so be it, she was happy for them.

"Ya ok… give me a couple minutes to get changed?" Cruz looked at her seeing her for the first time she walked in, she looked like she had been at a funeral or somewhere very important for her to dress up like that.

"Twenty ok?" okay now she didn't have to say Cruz was going crazy she was already there, ahh another person had come to her dark side. Only 7 million and 999 998 more people to convince to become crazy.

"Ya ok" she looked at Cruz then left.

* * *

He found her in the locker room unbuttoning her shirt, she had known their was a possibility that she would run into him, she just wished she hadn't.

"Where you been for the last 24 hours?" he had no right to ask that question but he did anyways

"Well dad, most of the time was spent at the hospital with my nephew, then I was at my sister's funeral, ohh I spent most of last night with Hayden at the park, and right now I'm changing because Cruz wants me to work Anti-Crime. Anything else you want to know?"

"Ya just one will you be home after your shift?"

"No. I'm going out"

She grabs a shirt out of her locker and put it on. He wanted to know what he did to deserve this kind of treatment, it did turn him on a little but that was beside the point. She took of her pants, sending blood rushing to a growing erection. If anyone saw her like this, they would be sure to see his erection. Luckily no one was in here, if they were they weren't paying them any attention to them. He didn't know if this was going to go away he may have to take a trip to the zoo, to get rid of it.

"I don't have all day" she pulled on her pants and he watched how they slid up her thighs and over her hips. His mouth went dry, he didn't think something so simple could be so erotic. She saw him staring and rubbed against him, leaving his skin on fire. She reached in between him cupping him. She whispered in his ear

"Is this for me?" she licked his ear, she began stroking him through his pants. She was driving him crazy.

"I have to go" the hot air over his wet skin, made him shiver and with that she left. He felt cold the moment she left. This wasn't going to be easy. He wanted more than just sex with her, but for now he'd have to remain quiet. He was good at that. He closed her locker and left.

* * *

"So how's Bosco doing?" finally the real reason she was in AC, well her guess had been a little off, she figured near the end of shift maybe an hour or two left, or the latest when they had been drinking, but it came with three hours left.

"Why don't you ask him yourself?" she was not going to be the go-between them. If she wanted to know she would have to ask him, herself on her own time.

"I'm not going to be the go-between"

"Just trying to make conversation, that's the only thing we have in common"

"I'm sure we have other things"

"Like what? Where we like to eat? What we get our groceries? What kind of shampoo we use?"

"Well, I have a weakness for fast food, I get my groceries a block away from where I live I think it's called Al's Grocer's or something, and I use Garnier Fructis- Sleek and Shine then I follow that with the conditioner then the serum to help soothe my frizzy hair"

"Natural hair colour?" ha Bosco didn't even know that, she'd been dying her hair long before he came

"Dark brown"

"Me too" was the Sgt admitting she dyed her hair? You learned something new everyday.

After that Cruz didn't ask her anything about Bosco or her personal life, she talked about general things, current issues or other members of the 79.

* * *

The apartment was dark and quiet when she got home shortly after two. He was tucked in nice and tight sleeping on his stomach. She slid up beside him so she was half on him and started talking to him.

"Hey sexy, what are you doing?"

"Sleeping" he grumbled, she ran her hand down from his shoulder to his butt and smacked it hard.

"What time is it?" she glanced at the clock over his shoulder

"A little bit after two"

"I have to get up in three hours"

"What if I told you I switched you to the third today?"

"I would say you were a lifesaver"

"Really what flavour?"

"Anyone you wanted to be"

"How about orange?" she crawled under the covers

"Fine, can I get some sleep now?" her hands made their way him running her hand up and down his chest

"But you're working the third" her hand dipped lower and started playing with his drawstrings of his pants. He suddenly became awake

"Why would you do that?"

"So we could have sex, itsjust for one day" he placed his hand on tops of hers and slid it down, inside of his pants to his swollen member

"This is what you do to me" she gripped him and started running her hand up and down his shaft. His breath came out in short gasps.

"And that's what you do to me" she trail kisses down the back of his neck, her hand continued to travel up and down.

* * *

Sun trickled in slowly waking her, she tried to sit up but the pain in her head quickly killed that idea. She laid still breathing in and out, waiting for the headache to pass, she shouldn't have drank so much.

"Morning sleepy-head" Bosco came in with a coffee and a bottle of aspirin. Nausea stopped her from moving.

"I had a feeling that you were drunk. Here take these" he hands her the coffee and aspirin, she takes two and downs half the coffee. As he sits down beside her on the bed, his arm propped across her legs.

"Feel better?"

"Not by a long shot" she rests the coffee on her legs

"I got the mail", he magically pulls them out from beside him he hands her everything that was addressed to her, it was mostly junk or bills but the last one was neither she opened it and skimmed over it.

'Ms. Ashley Ryans we request your presence at the 19th annual gala for sick children, yada yada yada included is your invitation along with a guest. Blah, blah Sunday July 17th blah blah'

"What's that?" she looked up

"An invitation to a charity benefit, I usually don't go, just send a check"

"Why not?"

"Cause I've never had a date, and its depressing"

"I'll go"

"It's a black tie event. You'll have to wear a tux"

"That's no problem. Honest"

"I guess we're going to a ball"

"Just out of curiosity how much money do you give them?"

" A million dollars once a year" his jaw dropped, he'd only dreamed of that kind of money.

"Ok how much money exactly do you have to your name?"

"Last time I checked close to 50 million. Why?"

"That change your opinion of me?"

"Surprisingly no it doesn't"

A/N I'm sorry but i dont know who i want her to be with, right now she's just having sex with Bosco so you can call them Sex Buddies, I dont know if that's going to change or not. Bear with me. As for the kids you'll find out what's going to happen to them later.


	17. Chocolate Anyone?

A/N: I love Chocolate Whipped Cream!

* * *

She wasn't sure how long this thing in ACU would last but so far it had lasted two days, yesterday and today. She had called her mother before they left the apartment and so far Nathan had been recovering fairly fast. A quick healer just like her and Dakota, when they were kids they would constantly fight and one of them would always get hurt and be fine the next day.

Ashley's cell phone started ringing, while they were in the car she swore she turned it off before she got in but somehow she must of forgot, she tried to ignore it but Cruz didn't.

"Aren't you going to answer it?"

"You don't mind?"

"No" that was a relief but she wasn't going to start taking calls while she was working, only emergencies. She dug in her pocket trying to remember which one she put it in. She quickly answered it.

"Mom what's wrong?"

"How did you know it was me?"

"Caller ID, hurry I'm working"

"He doesn't want us to have them"

"Who doesn't want you to have them?" she needed a little more than that

"Robert he changed his will saying we couldn't have them let Social service's have them"

"We're talking about Nathan and Rachael right?"

"Who else would I be talking about?"

"I don't know"

"I need your help. Can he do that?" the truth was he could, they could contest it but that would be a lengthily process.

"Ya mom he can" she heard the gasp on the other end. "Look I get off in a couple of hours, we'll take then ok?" she had taken up to much time already

"All right. I'll be at the hospital," she pressed the disconnect button, things were getting worse rather than better. And she was powerless to stop it.

The moment she walked out of the precinct she called Hayden, she apologized for calling so late, and he told her that it wasn't that late and that he was glad she called, and insisted that they meet for coffee. She told him her problem and he recommended some good lawyers that could get the ball rolling. He'd call in a few favors if he had to; she also told him that money was no object. She wanted the best.

She sat with her head tilted back touching the wall, her eyes closed, a cup of coffee in her hand. The hallway was quiet, but that wasn't surprising at this hour, she should be home sleeping, but she did work the third and since then Bosco and her have been getting along she didn't want to wring his neck she wanted to jump his bones every time she saw him now but refrained because he was usually sleeping maybe she would talk to him about switching to third that way they had both nights and the mornings together, it wasn't like they were going to be working together she was in ACU while he was in uniform. Many things happened in both that were different from the other. She must of dozed of because her mother's voice pulled her from dream land.

"Go home" she sat up

"I'm awake" she glanced around trying to gather her surroundings, she couldn't help but yawn, her mother noticed

"Ashley your tired go home, Nathan's sleeping anyways"

"You sure?" she didn't want to leave Nathan alone with her mother.

"I've got it covered"

She loved working ACU but the down side was all the paperwork, most of the paperwork she had seen when she was working the desk was from Anti-Crime. And today they had to stay behind because she had sent everyone away and somebody had to stay and hold down the fort. It wasn't all bad though, the precinct was air-conditioned and they had an all time high heat wave of a hundred plus weather, which had been going on for three days now. Which meant that everyone who didn't have AC was outside, causing trouble from cracking open fire hydrants and just being a pain in the ass.

The heat didn't stop her from drinking her coffee though, nor did it for Cruz. She'd just gotten them both a cup, she was surprised that the woman had no cavity's she took three sugars in her coffee. As she sipped her coffee she couldn't help remember what her grandmother said about coffee on a hot day. Why should your insides get to be cool when the outside was suffering? She drank coffee everyday of her life, up until the day she died. Always the best too, she didn't care how much it had cost she had this Blue Hawaiian stuff that had tasted pretty good actually, she'd pick some up when she had time.

"Are you and Bosco seeing each other?" that question certainly came out of nowhere

"Could you be a little more specific?" she purposely took a sip of her drink hiding her face from her. She held on to cup warming her suddenly cold hands.

"You know a couple, sleeping together?" she tried to think back to see if she let anything slip or if anyone had seen them together, she could remember a time, so their had to be another reason why she was asking.

"No why do you ask?" no one was going to find out they were sleeping together from her.

"Just wondering" she should have left it at that but something told her it was more than just a curious question

"You never wonder now tell me what's up" she kept the coffee cup in front of her in case she had to take a sip quickly to gather her thoughts.

"I don't have to" she couldn't believe she was going to pull rank just because she didn't want to say why she was appalled.

"I'm not talking as one cop to another, I'm talking to one friend to another" she saw subtle changes in Cruz's face she had won another battle. She didn't say anything but took a sip of her coffee, and then it dawned on Ashley.

"You want Bosco back don't you?" it couldn't have been more obvious; questioning the one he lived with behind his back. Suddenly she was transformed back to high school her best friend had done the same thing years ago. Half the time her and the ended up hooking up, but other times Ashley had to play the match maker and date the best friend and then just happen to set up a double date. Cruz still hadn't said anything when she returned back to the present.

"So how close am I to the truth? Hmm?"

Cruz avoided looking at her and continued to work on the never-ending paper work. She tried to shake away the pangs of jealously they kept trying to enter her mind but that only worked for so long before she had to deal with what was really bothering her. She was falling for Bosco.

Ashley was sitting on the couch, freshly showered lost in her own thoughts. Last time she checked Bosco had been sleeping, which was a good thing, she didn't need him to meddle with what she was thinking about. How could it after all this time she be falling in love with a person she considered her best friend, their had to be an explanation for it. All she smelt was him, she had to start wearing her own shirts to bed again, you would think that since they used the same laundry detergent that their clothes would smell the same, they didn't not by a long shot. She ran a hand through her hair; she was in big trouble with it only to get worse as time went on. Every time she got involved with someone things always went wrong, no matter how hard she tried to prevent it. If she was smart she would break it off with him right now and allow Cruz to persuade him to go back her. The more she thought about doing that, the more she didn't want to. He was hers dammit!

She brought her knees to her chest, and rested her head on her knees. She couldn't help but think this couldn't be solved on her own.

_It clicks just like a Timex  
It never lets up on you_

Maybe she would invent something that would stop time, so she could take as long as she wanted to think about things.

_Who said life was easy  
The job is never through_

Or maybe hire someone to invent it, she had the money. But that would only create more problems.

_It'll run us 'til we're ragged  
It'll harden our hearts_

"Are you coming to bed?" she watched him walk around the couch and sit beside her

_And love could use a day of rest  
Before we both start falling apart_

"To much on my mind" she studied him, seeing if she saw in a new light, nothing had changed, he was the same old Bosco she knew and unfortunately loved.

""Like?"

"Things, it's not important"

"It must be if its keeping you awake" he took a piece of her hair and ran it between his fingers feeling it's softness, when had he ever felt anything so soft. He hadn't.

_I Pray that it's raining on Sunday  
Stormin' like crazy_

He didn't know how they did it but they got both Sunday and Monday off, Sunday because working the morning shift would make them tired that night and working the third made them miss it. And Monday well the boss had just given them that off.

"Can I try to take your mind off your problems?" she didn't see how he could when he was the problem.

"Sure" he reached for her hand pulling it towards him turning her hand up, he kissed her palm his tongue darted out tasting her ski almost undid her. He moved forward and kissed her wrist doing the same thing he had done to her palm. He was killing her and he didn't even know it.

"Bosco"

He leaned forward enough so that their lips almost met.

"Shh" somehow her legs had gone down and felt like jelly. His lips touched hers. He pulled back only far enough so he could talk.

"Oh Ashley" he trailed a finger down her smooth cheek. "If only you knew what you did to me" she did all to well. His piercing blue stare was softened tonight; you would never know he was capable of staring a man down, or ripping his head off. Her hand went to the back of his neck playing with the ends of his hair. His lips touched her again, this time with an urgency that was undeniable. And then she clued in, he loved her.

She awoke in his arms, even in his sleep he was possessive his arms weren't about to let her go and she desperately had to pee. She tried moving to see if that would loosen his hold, it only tightened.

"Bosco" he moved but she didn't know whether or not he heard her

"Bosco let go of me I need to pee" he didn't budge

"Bosco I'm pregnant" that got his attention and he shot awake, letting go of her. She bolted out of bed to the bathroom. She didn't go straight back to he bed she detoured to the kitchen starting a pot for the much needed coffee. She was reaching into the cupboard for two mugs when a hand went on her hip and reached for her pulling them out. The mugs down, his other hand went to her other hip.

_We'll hide under the covers all afternoon  
Baby whatever comes Monday_

Can take care of itself 

"Come back to bed" he began kissing her left shoulder as she waited for the coffee to brew.

"I can't think when you do that" she clenched her fists hoping he wouldn't see her trembling.

He stopped but only to say, "That's the whole point isn't it" she shivered, his lips did strange things to her insides.

_Cause we've got better things to do  
When it's raining on Sunday_

"Guess what?" he'd moved on to the back of her ear

"What?" she'd play along

"It's raining" what was he getting at? "So there's no reason to go out until tonight"

"I like how you think"

"You like something else about me too?" she turns in his arms; she caught him by surprise he had leaned in to kiss her shoulder but caught her lips instead.

"Well I like your lips" he kissed her again "and your eyes" another kiss "your butt" he went to kiss her again but she stopped him with her finger on his lips "and your mind, personality, and of course your body"

"I was worried there for a second, that you weren't going to say my body"

_Your life is like a religion  
A cross in Mexico  
And your kiss is like the innocence  
Of a prayer nailed to a door  
Oh surrender is much sweeter  
When we both let it go  
Let the water wash our bodies clean  
And love wash our souls_

His fingers brushed over her nipple causing it to harden instantly, he noticed that

"You like that?" his fingers brushed over the other nipple, she bit down on her lip. He continued to touch her nipples through the thin shirt. It was getting hard to breathe let alone think.

"What about the cof- ee?" he'd taken her nipple in his mouth through her shirt.

"I was thinking whipped cream" he left her the cool air hitting her. She watched him open the fridge and look around trying to find something, finding it, he reached in and withdrew the can of whipped cream and closed the fridge.

"My, my chocolate whipped cream, I'm going to have fun with this" He popped the top of the unopened can sending it, into the sink with a clunk. As he walked back over to her he shook it, he moved her hair away from her shoulder and pressed the nozzle shooting whip cream onto her shoulder. His tongue licked away the cream.

"Mmm" He holds her hair up as he points the nozzle to the back of her neck, slowly licking it off her in slow circles. He lets go of her hair, sending it cascading down her back. He turned her to face him, seeing the wet marks on the gray shirt excite him even more.

He sets down the can to remove her shirt; she grabs the can before he has a chance to reclaim it.

"My turn" she starts off with both sides of his collarbone, then moves on to his chest putting cream in random places. He was loosing it. She licked the last of the cream off and walked away, she turned motioning him to follow her with a flick of her finger. He followed happily. She stopped suddenly and put the can down, he was too caught up to reach for it. She came to him, her hands igniting a fire; she bent down as she pulled off his boxers leaving him to spring out at her. He didn't think he could get any harder, until she pushed him down in a chair and picked up the can of whipped cream again. She directed a line of the chocolate whipped cream along his erect penis. She took him in her mouth tasting the chocolate, cream and his maleness.

_And pray that it's raining on Sunday  
Stormin' like crazy  
And we'll hide under the covers all afternoon  
And baby whatever comes Monday  
Can take care of itself  
'Cause we've got better things that we can do  
When it's raining on Sunday  
Ooh, oh oh_

They never made it the bed; he took her in the chair, both climbing higher than they had ever climbed before. She quietly tiptoed out of the bedroom to the forgotten coffee. The liquid going down her throat calmed her nerves for now. She wasn't sure how long she had stood there before she heard noises coming from the bedroom; she walked to it, coffee in hand. Bosco wasn't awake, but tossing and turning, she sat her coffee down on the nightstand beside the bed and sat on the side of the bed. He started moaning in his sleep, she couldn't understand it, but tried to wake him.

"Bosco"

"Bosco wake up" he jumped awake, breathing heavily, sweat above his brow, him entangled in the sheet; it looked like he'd just seen a ghost.

"Are you ok?" she checked him over; her hands went to his head, his chest, his arms.

"It all seemed so real" his voice sounded like a little kid, she didn't know what he dreamt about but she knew it bothered him.

"Here" she handed him; her coffee and he drank but made a face doing so.

"Not enough cream"

"I'm sure I can rustle up some cream if you really want"

"It's fine" he continued drinking, she got up.

"Where you going?"

"Make something to eat, you want anything?" he shook his head no and laid back down.

She stayed out in the kitchen until she knew he was sleeping again before she snuck in and got some clothes out, she pulled them on, all the while watching him, making sure she didn't wake him. She grabbed her keys and left.

She returned an hour later, a dress in hand, a bag full on night lights, and shoes. She put laid her dress down over the arm of the couch. She checked on him, still out cold, she must of really tired him out. She dug into the bag and placed a night light in every room, she bought the ones where they turned on instantly the moment it got dark, she didn't want to make it too obvious so she half hid them. Time to wake him up, she put the last of the packaging in the garbage and went to wake him.

"Sleepy beauty time to get up" she half said, half sang.

"Five more minutes" he muffled into his pillow

"No because I have to get ready too"

"If I must," he said getting up

"Believe me you must"

* * *

A/N: Ya so how'd you like it? 


	18. What could happen?

A/N: Bit of a boring chapter, just had to establish that they were at the charity event and who was there with them. Next chapter will be more entertaining.

"Ashley Hurry Up" just when he started to think that she was in a category of her own, she would go and do something that would put her back into the woman category, she had been in the bathroom for over two hours, doing what he didn't even begin to think about doing what.

He had it good, he didn't need to shave his legs or armpits, he didn't need to tweeze his eyebrows. He didn't need to put anything in his hair for it be manageable if he didn't want it to be. He spent roughly twenty minutes in the bathroom and half of that was for the shower.

The bathroom door opened revealing her, in a sleek black dress. That fit her in all the right places, her hair pulled back to rest at the back of her nape (neck). His brain did what any other guy's brain did when he saw a woman who looked gorgeous it shut off, leaving him without a thought and his mouth open any second drool was going to fall out.

"What don't you like it?" she ran a hand over the fabric, he liked it, he liked it a lot.

"I-It's-" okay brain turn back on now "I've never seen you like this" he wouldn't mind seeing more of this either.

"Is that good or bad?" she had walked over to the window closest to her bending over just enough that he caught a glimpse of a tattoo on her lower back. He'd have to pay special attention to that later tonight.

"Our limo's here" Limo?

"Why is there a limo outside?"

"To take us to the event of course" she started across the room adjusted her dress along the way

"I hope it doesn't rain, it'll ruin my hair" he doubted if a hurricane would knock the hair down.

She slid on her jacket; he guessed that was new, he'd never seen it before. It also helped his brain turn back on, making him realize that he hadn't moved in the past five minutes. On their way out he grabbed an umbrella just in case he had a feeling he couldn't shake and it wasn't a good one either.

The limo driver had opened the door for him, something he wasn't accustomed to, you wanted in a car, you opened the door yourself. Living the good life did have its advantages, the limo had been decked out with a full bar, a colour tv, he knew cause he checked it out the moment he got in, and a good stereo system to boot. Ashley handed him a glass of champagne, and say back holding hers.

"What's this for?"

"Everyone's already half way drunk when they get there, why not join the party?" she takes a large sip from her glass. He looked at her over the rim of his glass as he drank, there was something she wasn't telling him.

He knew where the money was going from these events the moment he walked in, the place was strung out for a rich party. One's who had money and quite often flaunted it.

"It's still not to late to back out" she whispered into his ear as she was getting her coat checked.

"No I wanna stay" the band in full swing, the dance floor was crowded with older couples, roughly same amount was sitting down talking to each other. He saw various waiters around the room, serving champagne and appetizers, they were probably named something he couldn't pronounce. If he couldn't pronounce it, he didn't eat it. He also didn't like the music either, too oldish for him, he liked something with a good beat, and didn't mind if he couldn't understand the words, as long as he could understand one word he was set.

She stayed away from these kind of parties for a reason, everyone was out to show others what they had, and those who didn't to want it. He father had taken her to many of these parties when she was a little girl, filling in for her mother who was too drunk or high at the time to know her own name. She always sat by herself, no one talked to her, they talked about her literally behind her back, about how much of a whack job of her family was, soon she had learned you create a little ruckus between the ladies they didn't talk about you they talked about the women in question. It was great; by the time she was twelve she caused three divorces, ten separations and one overdose. Bosco didn't know about this or where she had grown up she left out the parts of the parties, and exactly where she lived. This was something that she thought he didn't need to know. She recognized most of the people in the room, except some new husbands and wives were added, this was where you could only have old money to get in, new money wasn't welcome.

Some actually welcomed her, with big grins and told her they were very sorry for her loss and for her mother to give them a call, when she had the time. That was a message she wasn't going to pass on, they were baiting her mother, just some lame excuse to talk about her. Things must be getting dull, she'd cause some ruckus.

Bosco looked like a deer caught in the headlights, he didn't know these people nor did he want to but they didn't need to know that. Some of the men had struck up conversation with him, disappoint came over their faces when he told them what he did. The women however were a different story, they were all over him, he liked it, even if they were old enough to be his mother and grandmother. They hung onto his every word, like he was a god.

He'd lost track of Ashley some time ago, but he needed to find her, he politely excused himself and quickly glanced around, he found her talking to the other half of the woman who weren't paying him any attention. She saw him and too quickly excused her self, she'd give them thirty seconds after she left for them to start talking about her.

"I need a drink" she said to him, they made their way over the open bar at the side of the large room. There was a little bit of a line so they waited their turn; quietly talking about the night they had so far. He stepped closer for only to hear.

"I wonder if they know, you have a tattoo" she side glanced him.

"Oh I bet they do, you part your hair differently one day they know" they moved up to the bar, finally their turn, they placed their orders and the waiting began again. Soon they were walking away drinks in hand, to an empty table. They sat side-by-side knees touching.

"Have I told you that you look beautiful tonight?" he leaned forward; if he planned it right he could have a kiss within seconds.

"Only the five times between home and here"

"Well I'm saying it again, you look gorgeous" he leaned even closer

"Your trying to get a kiss aren't you?" she leaned forward too, mere inches separating them.

"So what if I am is it working?" she leaned forward so their lips about to touch.

"No" and pulled back completely, looking around. She downed her drink and stood up to get another, he stood up quickly too, downing his drinking in record time.

"Don't worry I got it" she smiles as she motions him to sit

"I think your newly found fan club wants you back" she motioned him to look a few tables down where at least half a dozen women were watching him intently.

"Just remember who you're going home with" she walked away. She ordered two more drinks, looking around her, thinking off a way to cause a little scene, between ladies. But she had to say it casually if not they would come down on her. As much as she wanted that to happen so she could tell where to stick it, it was best if they didn't talk about her.

The bartender handed her drinks and she turned around, ready to deliver his drink when she ran into something tall and smelt good, she looked up. His name hadn't been on the guest list, that's why she agreed to come.

"Hayden, what are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing" he moved in front of her and placed his order, leaning against the bar, preventing anyone else from getting their orders filled. She downed half her drink as he paid for his then slipped another bill on the counter and moments later, a repeat of her drink stood with his.

"I'm here because my step father convinced me to go in his place, him and mother are out on business" she downed the rest, he handed her, hers and picked up his two. Of course he brought someone, he had moved on, that should excite her but it didn't.

He made her go with him to deliver his dates drink to his date who sat sitting by herself, her back to them. Her skin soaked up the light around her, dread started pooling in her stomach, she knew who it was but would act surprised when the woman turned around.

"I brought you, a drink" the woman turned around, revealing what she had guessed from the beginning. She plastered a smile on, and welcomed the woman

"Hello Sgt, I didn't know you were going to be here" the smile was starting to hurt.

"We're not at work you can call me Maritza"

"Ok"

"Hey you still haven't told me why you're here"

"I donate money"

"Certainly you don't make enough to donate a large sum"

"I do what I can" she tried looking anywhere but them, she needed to deliver Bosco's drink to him.

"If you'll excuse me" she tried to make her getaway, didn't happen

"Wait, why don't you join us?" how to tell them no, without sounding like a bitch?

"You two probably want to be alone" hoping that one of them would catch the hint she dropped

"Come on, it'd give us somebody to talk to" sensing neither knew much here, Hayden had said his step father sent him in his place, so that meant the marriage was recent. Who knew she didn't keep up to date with these people anymore.

"Who you here with?" Hayden asked her, she'd rather not tell them but she was going to.

"Bosco" the smile on Hayden's face fell

"Speaking of which, I better deliver his drink" she left, and no one stopped her.

"I thought you got lost" he took his drink from her and sipped.

"No, just ran into some people I know" she would only tell him, if he asked if he knew them, thankfully he didn't. Clapping began the only sound between them, as they silently sipped their drinks. The band started up again, more couples came out to dance.

"Care to dance?" he set his drink down on the table, getting up and extending his hand for her to take.

"Thank you" she placed her hand in his allowing him to pull her up and off to the dance floor.

They weren't dancing long before, he became tense

"Were they the one's you stopped to talk with?" she turned to see who he was talking about. Hayden and Cruz

"Ya, they asked us to join them but, I told them no"

"What are they doing here?"

"Not sure, Hayden said something about his stepping in for his step father or something.

"Look at her, she doesn't have a care in the world" the carefree woman and stepping in man slowly made their way over them, civilly smiling at the two. The song ended and everyone clapped along, a new song started up and Hayden whisked Ashley away before the second note was played. Leaving Bosco to ask if Cruz wanted to dance. She said yes and soon they were dancing unaware of the Ashley and Hayden making their way off the dance floor and out onto the terrace.

They moved aside to let a couple could pass, the rain had held off so far. The distant thunder told everyone a storm was coming and soon. She casually strolled to the end of the balcony. The dampness of the recent rain prevented her from touching the railing and anything else that wasn't covered.

"You look beautiful tonight" his fingers stroking the exposed flesh of her shoulder.

"Thank you, you also look lovely tonight" she took a step side ways away from him and his touch. He dropped his hand to his side. Her skin suddenly hot, she leaned forward so her arms were the only thing touching the dampened railing, she welcomed the coolness of the metal against her skin.

"I've been thinking" he scanned the sky, the thunder growing louder with every bolt of lightning.

"There prolly wondering where we are" she stood up ready to go back in.

"I'm sure they can get along without us for five minutes" she wanted to protest but it would have fallen on deaf ears, so she remained silent.

"Ever since that night in the park, I've been thinking about you, me us" she didn't like where this was going.

"I want us to get back together" oh no, Oh no. A few weeks ago if he wanted her back she would go willingly, now she wasn't so sure.

"Hayden I" he silenced her with his lips.

Shock was an understatement when Bosco saw Hayden pull Ashley into a kiss, and it hurt more when she didn't pull or push him away. He heard a short gasp beside him and glanced that way. Cruz stood beside him in awe, could it be that the ice queen had feelings for the Assistant DA? No it couldn't be, he glanced at her again. Yup, miss ice definitely had feelings for the guy. He looked back to the couple oblivious to everyone, the kiss had ended, he wasn't sure but from this distance Ashley looked pissed. She walked away from Hayden and back into the ballroom, no one paid any attention to her, she bee lined for bar, and down two before Bosco got to her, he hadn't said two words before Hayden came up behind them. Now was as good time as any to tell a person you loved them.

"Ashley" she looked at him, gulping down the drink. Hayden came up beside her, out of breath from the extrusion he had catching up with her.

"I love you" was said at the same time from both men as the lights went out.


	19. This Could Happen

A/N: Okay I will make if **VERY **clear who Ashley wants to be with, in this chapter. And no she's not pregnant it was just a little trick to get Bosco off of her. I am sorry that its been confusing.

* * *

(Ashley)

A few screams were heard when the lights went out. How the hell did she get two guys to fall for her? She was happen with one, but two? A rice deep voice tried to calm everyone.

"I assure you, the back up generators will be on very shortly within minutes" the lights came back on. Every one had gone back to talking thinking that was the last of their worries. The thunder shook the chandelier.

She stood looking at the two men, in shocked and terrified, she already who she wanted but that would mean she'd hurt the other. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Cruz storm off, why the hell was everyone mad at her? She didn't want to lose Cruz as a friend so she took off after her, leaving the two men staring down at the other.

She stood at a stand still, she could go left or right the middle was a closet of some sort. She was just about to go left with she heard quiet sobs coming from the closet. She knocked

"Cruz?" and opened the door, the woman had her back turned towards her.

"Maritza? You never wanted Bosco back did you?" the woman turned to her then, her cheeks wet from the tears, she shook head no. Well that was a relief.

"I'm sorry I cant change how Hayden feels" she smiled as fresh tears ran down her cheeks. Ashley let go of the door and moved closer to Cruz, the door shutting behind her with a click.

She didn't pull Cruz into a hug, neither were that kind of person she did hand her a tissue though and Cruz wiped her ears, laughing.

"Theirs something I have to tell you" ahh no Cruz wasn't in love with her too was she?

"Ok" she sat on a crate

"David did drug you, that I night. I gave him the drugs, nothing happened between the two of you, I paid him to make it look like you two did. I knew that you would tell Hayden and he would break up with you, giving me a chance" Ashley let out a short laugh, she would have rather had Cruz say she was in love with her, she could handle that, this was a lot to take in. A little relieved that she didn't sleep with David but why would he do that too her?

"Why'd he do it?"

"I caught him pocketing some dope the week before" black mail, she still didn't know if David would have done it to her, if Cruz hadn't of caught him.

"I want you to know I have nothing against you, I just wanted Hayden"

"Then why date Bosco?" why involve someone that didn't need to be

"To make Hayden jealous. Didn't work though, he was too involved with you"

"I also lied to you, when I said Bosco and I weren't sleeping together we were and still are"

"He loves you, you know"

"How can you tell?"

"The way he looks at you, his eyes light up whenever you walk into a room" Ashley looked down the floor, fearing that Cruz was going to say something along with that

"You love him too" she looked up, opening her mouth to protest but what was the point she did.

"My advice is tell him"

"I just might" she got off the crate and went to the door, she turned the knob it came off in her hand. That wasn't good.

"You've gotta be kidding me" Ashley muttered under her breath, she tried putting the knob back in but it was useless, the thing only fell back into her hand. She wanted to throw the thing across the room in frustration but that would only alert Cruz that something was wrong.

"Why haven't you opened the door?" busted, she felt like she was a kid again but she didn't have her hand in the cookie jar though. She turned around trying to hide the knob behind her and tried to block the door the best she could.

"I just thought we talk more" she wasn't sure what had come over Ashley, something told her that something had to be wrong for her to act this way

"Ok"

"Would you tell me what happened at Mercy hospital?" she backed herself against the door, all the while trying to get the knob back into its place, so that when Cruz opened the door, she could blame it on her. Hell she used her ex husband against her to get something that she still didn't have.

She heard a soft click and let go hoping that it didn't fall back out again.

"Not much to tell, except goons came in and started shooting. Bosco got hurt pretty bad" she said cautiously, wondering what exactly the problem was. Cruz got up, and walked closer to the door, Ashley went in the direction Cruz had just come, wanting to put some distance between herself and the door. They weren't exactly getting along now. She saw Cruz reached for the knob

"How about Marcel Hollis?" her hand snatched back

"That's none of your business" her hand went back to the door

"I heard you blew yourself up" once again her hand dropped

"Obviously not" her hand closed around the doorknob, Ashley closed her eyes. She heard a louder click this time as Cruz let out a frustrated breath. Ashley opened her eyes, to find a very pissed off Cruz with a doorknob in her hand.

"What did you do?" Ashley asked innocently

"I didn't do it" Cruz came back sarcastically

"You're holding the knob" Ashley snapped back.

"Don't you think I don't know that?" Ashley felt if she spoke again her, head was going to be ripped off by her bare hands. She didn't have time to think of something before Cruz spoke again.

"If I didn't know any better, I swear you rigged this" she had to be kidding, why the hell would she want to be stuck in with Cruz?

"Since you know all, please enlighten me, with why in god's name would I want to be stuck with you?" Ashley was loosing her temper and fast.

"Oh I don't know" Cruz was getting angry too, so she decided to just end the conversation their.

"Do you ever think before you speak?" the question slipped out of Ashley's mouth before she could stop it. If looks could kill, Ashley would be about twenty feet under right now, and on her way farther down. Cruz turned her attention to the door, trying to put the doorknob back on, having little luck, Cruz got frustrated and throwing the knob across the door, missing Ashley's head by a inch

"You throw like a girl" Cruz gave another if looks could kill looks to Ashley before she spoke

"I am one" she crossed her arms over her chest, if she didn't her hands would surely find themselves wrapped around Ashley's neck.

Music drifted in, telling them that if they tried to get help no one would hear them. They could be stuck in here for hours before either of the men clue in that they were no longer talking, but stuck in a utility room. Least it was big there was lots of air. Both women silently cursed themselves for not bringing their purses with their phones in them, into the dark room with them. Well neither of them thought they would be in here that long to need them.

They sat in silence for just over an hour, or so either thought, mainly trying of ways to get out or direct attention to the room so they could get out. Cruz's gaze wondered over the darkened room, the room in shadows, the main light source was a small bulb in the middle of the room, the light gave the room a creepy vibe. Cruz's eyes wondered up, and stopped when she saw something shiny. She walked over to it, she couldn't reach it but maybe Ashley could if she were lucky or stood on something.

"I think I found our way out" Cruz said pointing to air vent

"We have a slight problem" Ashley didn't say anymore on the matter causing Cruz to face the woman, her eyes were glued to the floor, so naturally Cruz's gaze followed, until she saw something that could put a damper on ever being found.

Smoke.

* * *

Cruz ran to the door, banging with everything inside of her, screaming at the top of her lungs. Ashley hung back staring at the other woman. Cruz stopped and turned around, wondering if Ashley had lost her mind, not helping her trying to get out.

Ashley met Cruz's eyes she knew something Cruz didn't

"That's not going to help us" she said slowly

"And you standing there isn't either"

"Their not going to hear us" both tempers rising once again

"And why is that?" s her hands went to her hips, ready to object anything Ashley said

Ashley didn't say anything but held up three fingers, then, then one, then none. An alarm went off, screams could be heard too.

"That's why"

* * *

(Bosco)

"Where the girls?" Bosco asked Hayden just as the alarm went off.

"I don't know, they ran off that way" he motioned his head towards the back of the room. It was getting harder to see each other, with the people trying to flee, get out of what ever was happening. Both stood still, waiting until the last had past them. With no one in the room except them and the smoke, they headed off into the back of the room, the smoke getting thicker as they went. Both held their arms in front of their mouths, trying not to breathe in the smoke. The smoke burned their eyes, and lungs. They couldn't keep this up much longer.

Bosco saw it before Hayden did, and leapt out to knock him out of the way. Both fell to the floor as the beam swung past them. Hayden's eyes opened wide, the beam had swung exactly where he was standing moments before.

"That almost hit me" his mouth open, in disbelief.

"We have to keep moving, this place could go any minute" Bosco said already getting up to a crouch, the air was less smoke ridden the lower to the ground.

They walked by the utility room door, thinking they would be that silly to go in there. They made it to the back where the emergency exit door was open still.

"We have to go" Bosco latched on to Hayden's arm, the place was about to give

"We have to find them" Hayden tried to free his arm

"Look their both smart, they would have heard the alarm and got out, I'm sure their outside right now, wondering where the hell we are" Hayden gave in and walked out the exit following Bosco.

* * *

(Ashley)

The room was filling with smoke more steadily now; both women had crouched lower to the floor, trying to find something to either break down the door, or the air vent. The air vent didn't look big enough but it was their only way out. Their was a loud noise and then she heard Cruz swear, that was good she was still alive but, the smoke was making her lungs burn, and it was getting harder to breathe. Finally she stumbled upon something long and hard, with her foot, she reached for it, it was metal. This would have to do, the light wasn't helping much and neither knew how much longer the light would stay on.

"I think I found something" Ashley called out, Cruz's response was to let out a long coughing fit. If the fire didn't kill them the smoke sure would. She stood up and a minute she couldn't breathe the smoke was so think she couldn't see a centimeter in front of her, then she got used to it, and the she started to see images through it. She saw the vent and started hitting the vent to break it loose. It wasn't working. The smoke overpowered her and she too let out a large deep cough. It wouldn't be long before one of them passed out. She hit harder and finally hurt the vent hit the floor, she let out a little laugh then heard a thud. She immediately went to her knees, knowing what it already was. She reached Cruz's limp body. Fuck! How the hell was she going to get the woman up and out the vent if she was passed out?

She started hitting Cruz's cheek to get her awake and it worked once but only for a little bit as Cruz let out a cough then passed out again. The room suddenly went dark, the light had gone out. For the first time since she saw the smoke she started to worry about not getting out of here. No she wouldn't let herself think about that, she was going to get them out of here. Why was it Cruz that always went out first? First the shooting now this, the Sgt wasn't as tough as she thought she was.

* * *

Both Bosco and Hayden searched the crowd twice, neither finding either woman. They were about to go back in when a firefighter stopped them, saying it was too dangerous, the place was about to go. Bosco went on about him being a cop, that he was going to talk to his supervisor, get him fired, everything he could think of. The man told him, he didn't care who he was he wasn't going to endanger a civilian and to leave it to the professionals.

* * *

She herself was that far from passing out, she could feel herself getting slower and more tired. She didn't let that stop her. She piled crates up the vent so that she wouldn't have much trouble in getting Cruz up there. Easier said than done. Pulling Cruz up was tiring and damn frustrating. She had to keep resting, needing air but their was none. She smacked Cruz hard against the face, it did good too, cause she woke up, disoriented but still alive for the time being.

"I need you to get in the vent and crawl to the right" Cruz didn't say anything but got herself into the vent and started crawling. Ashley wasn't far behind her.

* * *

Bosco hated that he couldn't do anything, had even tried to sneak in but he was caught and told to stay away. They even forced him to get himself checked out, he was going to have to stay the night in the hospital for smoke inhalation. Hayden was a wreck; he never stopped pacing repeating to himself over and over it was his fault. Bosco partly did blame him, it was him who had caused Cruz to run off, saying I love you to Ashley. But he kept his mouth shut, the guy already had enough to deal with.

"They're both fighters" he said more to convince himself than for Hayden

"That's what I'm afraid of" Hayden answered back

"I'm sure we just missed them, why not we go check again?" Hayden nodded, half hoping that they would find them, and it would all be some sort of mistake but deep down he knew they were still in there.

* * *

"I think I should get a raise or something, this is the second time I've saved your ass"

"Don't get cocky" Cruz said between coughs. "We have a problem"

"I give up, what else could be wrong now?" Ashley didn't believe her luck

"We're running out of vent and I don't see any connecting ones" after all this, after everything she did, their was no vent left to get out? Huh somebody was going to pay big time for this. Her hair fell out of its place obscuring her vision for a second before she pushed it away. What the else could go wrong other than them dying in here?

On cue the vent gave out, sending them into the fire pits below them.

* * *

A/N: Was the answer clear enough of who Ashley wanted to be with? If it wasn't she wants to be with Bosco. 


	20. But Why Would It?

Everyone saw part of the roof go out, Bosco's heart jumped into his throat. No it couldn't be, no the women were probably in a different part of the building, knowing his luck they were in the part that just collapsed.

* * *

Hayden didn't pace anymore, he was withdrawn from everyone even ignored Bosco when he tried talking to him; it still hadn't set in that he was never going to see either women again. The hope that told him that they were still alive, had gone down the drain.

* * *

The firemen were doing everything they could to keep the fire from spreading but it was giving them a go for their money. Even the steady rain that was falling wasn't helping.

* * *

The building looked very different now, well duh it was on fire, he told himself. He still didn't understand what had caused the fire. One minute he was standing there waiting for both women to come back the next, he was looking for them in a cloud of smoke. It really showed you how nothing was here to stay.

* * *

When they fell they hit hard, she felt like every bone in her body was broken, but moving told her that wasn't true, her muscles were the only things hurt. She had been lucky she didn't land on anything that was on fire, or that she hit her head. She looked around for Cruz, the women was already trying to get up, but couldn't something was preventing her from doing so. Ashley tried to get up and help but she was stuck too. Then she saw the debris on top of them; the little things came off no problem but their was one very long stubborn beam that wouldn't get off of them, the worst was that it was on fire and it was spreading it wouldn't be long before it was on their dresses, they would burn to death. A very painful way to die.

"On three, we're going to push it off" Cruz said beside her

"With what our feet? In case you hadn't noticed we're trapped from the waist down"

"Oh I saw but we're going to have to use our hands or find something. As she was speaking both were looking around. They were in a circle surrounded by fire, now she knew what it was like for dogs to pass through a burning flame. The fire nipping at them form every direction.

Cruz had found something she thought was strong enough but that was the only piece that was strong enough, the others would snap within seconds of being used. She offered it to Ashley but Ashley shook her head no. Ashley was going to have to use her hands. They would burn seconds before they touched the beam.

"One, two three" Ashley bit her lips as the fire burned her hands, but she ignored the pain, she didn't want to die like this, with the door being so close to them. The board moved very slowly but they finally got it off of them.

Now their biggest threat was getting through the ball of flames without getting on fire them selves. Their only option was to jump but neither knew what was on the other side, they could injure themselves if they landed the wrong way or on something and then the other would be useless. It was a risk they were willing to take.

Her hand burned, she hadn't looked down didn't want to see what they were like, she hoped that she would use them again but wasn't that hopeful, as long as she lived she'd sacrifice a limb.

Cruz ripped the dresses as high as they would go before they would show anything, it lessened their chance of the dress catching on fire but, it rose the chance for their legs to be burned. A small price to pay.

Cruz grabbed her hand, Ashley cried out,

"I'm soo sorry" then moved her hand up to Ashley's wrist in a death grip. They moved back as far as they could and ran, just getting enough clearance over the fire to eliminate the treat of their legs catching fire.

Pain instantly shot up her leg as she landed. She couldn't tell if it was broken or sprained, she walked on it anyways. Biting her lips so she tasted the copper taste of blood. They almost reached the door, when the worst thing could happen, part of the roof fell again blocking the door, with firry beams. Great, just great. Another sign they weren't meant to live. But when did she ever listen to the signs anyways?

Cruz didn't seem to be hurt as Ashley glanced at the woman beside her. So how many injuries did she have? Her hands were burnt, she may have broken her ankle and her lungs burned from all the smoke she had inhaled. All livable unless, their was too much smoke inside of her but she hadn't passed out yet so that was a good sign.

"Now what?" Ashley asked trying to get her mind off of the pain she had

"Another way out?" she tried searching for another way but the fire prevented her from going to far.

"The kitchen is the only thing closest to us" that's where the fire had started she'd bet. That was the direction the smoke was coming from. She didn't see any flames but that didn't mean it wasn't on fire.

"Wait here" Cruz said as she made her way over the kitchen, door as a precaution she put her hand against it, it was cool to the touch. She pushed it open a little and saw, only smoke no flames and a way out, the window above the sink. They were going to get out.

She ran back to Ashley who was on the verge of falling asleep but opened her eyes when she heard Cruz come back. They wanted to shut, no matter how hard she tried to keep them open. Cruz rushed to her side.

"Oh no you don't, you got me awake, so I'm keeping you awake" for emphasis Cruz bitched slapped Ashley, that got Ashley to open her eyes wide.

"Bitch!"

"Got you to stay awake didn't it?"

"You didn't have hit that hard you could have broken my jaw" Ashley moved her mouth to see if their was anything broken, if their was she could add it to her injury list. Luckily it wasn't..

"I found us a way out" she helped Ashley up, have seen the way Ashley landed, the ankle was definitely the very most broken.

"Here lean on me" he placed one Ashley's arm around her shoulders as they started to walk. By the time they got their part of the kitchen was in flames but it was on the opposite side of where the window was. So far they had very little luck, it was about time that it started to turn around for them.

* * *

Cruz left Ashley leaning against a counter; a whisper of curses stringing through her mouth at the moment the ankle was indeed broken. She didn't know if it was good or bad that they weren't coughing as much. Fresh air was on the other side of the window. And of course the window wouldn't open so she had to break it, using a pan that was near by, she used the pan to clear the glass away from the remaining parts of the window, so they wouldn't get scraped as much. The cool night air instantly filling the room, she'd never breathed anything as heavenly as this. Ashley limped over galloping in the air, which didn't last long before they both were coughing again.

"I'm sending you through first" Cruz said once she stopped coughing. Ashley didn't argue, she hopped on the counter almost falling in the sink, causing them both to laugh but then quickly moving on once again.

The drop was little but it was the rolling that hurt the most, she foolishly put her hands out to stop her self but was reminded of what had happened to them, when the pain increased.

She sat up, and watched Cruz get out of the window and tumble down the short slope under the window. Ashley knew she couldn't get up, herself, both her hands and ankle felt like they were about to fall off. She felt the sting in her arms and legs now, for the first time noticed the scraps on her legs and upper arms.

Cruz got up, stumbled a bit, then fell back down unconscious. She doubted that she could scream for help, her lungs burning more now then when she was in the smoke. She very carefully got her knees and put up the good foot first then other, she almost fell back down but caught herself. She half walked, half dragged herself over to Cruz, who was still out. She couldn't bitch slap her, hurt too much. So she screamed her name right in her ear, luck was slowly beginning to change sides, as Cruz slowly opened her eyes

"Get your ass up off the ground!" she screamed.

* * *

Her voice carried with the wind, and made Bosco's head shoot up, Hayden looked at him, then they took off running past the tape. Ashley was still yelling at Cruz who was very slowly getting up. Ashley was behind her, helping her up, her arm under Cruz pulling her up.

Bosco ran straight to Ashley grabbing her hands, to try to help her get Cruz up. Pain rendered her speechless, she couldn't speak, until Cruz spoke for her

"Let go of her hands" Bosco let go immediately, and Cruz got up. And let Ashley lean on her

"What the hell happened?" the pain still unreal for Ashley let herself be helped by Cruz and Hayden who had taken her other arm.

"We got trapped in the burnt her hands and may have broken her ankle. Hayden stopped and swept her into his arms, Bosco doing the same to Cruz.

"We need some help" Hayden shouted as soon as they were in yelling distance. Paramedics ran with gurneys came to them and each man deposited each women on to a different gurney. Oxygen masks were the first things that was placed on them.

* * *

They tried to put the women in different ambulances but both objected saying they could share one, save it for someone who really needed it more than them. They buckled Ashley onto the gurney, she protested the whole time but finally gave in and soon they were off. The back of the bus was crowded only meant for two, possibly three, four were in their nobody wanting to leave the other. The paramedics were in the front calling the hospital and telling them the details. Cruz leaned forward and Hayden placed a hand on her back, as she undid Ashley's buckles. She undid them all except for one she couldn't reach and Hayden happily helped.

Ashley sat up, carefully placing her feet on the floor.

"Thank you"

"Does it hurt?" Cruz asked

"Which one?" she finally raised her bandaged hands up

"These don't really hurt anymore neither does my ankle"

"Considering all the drugs they gave you, I'd say not" Hayden piped in.

"The drugs helped" Ashley smiled, she glanced at Bosco who was sitting where the paramedic sits in when the more traumatic were in here. His face was pale, and he wasn't looking at any of them but looking down.

"So how the hell did you to get stuck?" Hayden asked, Cruz and Ashley looked at each other Cruz nodded her head Ashley answered

"The door knob fell off, in Cruz's hand"

"It did not, you had something to do with it!"

"You cant prove anything" Ashley said seriously, but soon smiled

"Why were you in the room in the first place?" This question was directed to Cruz, Ashley looked at Cruz, Cruz's eyes silently told her 'help me' Ashley answered the question.

"She thought it was the bathroom, she was lucky I heard her on the way" Cruz relaxed a bit.

* * *

The ambulance stopped and the back soon opened, the paramedic looked sternly at her. Hayden got out first and held his hand out for Cruz to get out. Then held it for Ashley she moved towards the end of the gurney and reached for him, once again he took her into his arms. Bosco was the last to get out. He said nothing but disappeared soon after they were getting checked out.

The cast was being put on when Cruz and Hayden came in, Cruz in a wheelchair, Hayden doing the pushing.

"How's it going?" Cruz asked from the wheelchair

"Cant complain"

"They gave you more drugs"

"Yep" Ashley said with a big smile "why are you in a wheelchair?"

The nurse finished the cast and left

"Who the hell knows" she got up and walked over to the bed and hopped up beside her.

"Where's the real Cruz and what have you done with her?" Ashley asked

"I locked her in closet"

"At least she's alive"

"For the time being" both looked at Hayden who had sat him self in Cruz's chair and was trying to go up on two wheels. The conversation turned serious

"Have you seen Bosco?" Ashley asked still looking at Hayden who had almost accomplished his task.

"No, not since we came in here" Bosco showed up at the door, his jacket off, bow tie off, the sleeves rolled up and the top button was undone making him look extremely sexy. Cruz hopped off the bed and told Hayden to get out of her chair, she plopped herself in.

"Home James" Hayden wheeled her out of room. Bosco stepped back allowing them out.

He shut the door behind him.

* * *

"Hey handsome" his jaw clenched

"Feeling anything?" he looked at her cast

"Nope the drugs took the pain away" he nodded; he still wouldn't look at her.

"Is something wrong?" he wondered around the room

"No"

"Well your kinda freakin me out a bit here"

"I want to know something"

"Okay"

"Was what we had just something until Hayden took you back?"

"No" he nodded again

"Are you going back to him?"

"Will you stop walking around your making me dizzy"

He stopped walking

"Answer my question"

"What was it again?"

"Are you going back to him?"

"No"

"Why not?"

"Why would I?"

"He loves you"

"Doesn't mean I love him"

"I thought you did"

"So did I"

"what changed?"

"Someone else came into the picture"

"Who?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"I'm not in the mood for games"

"Its' was you"

"What are you getting at?"

"I love you"

* * *

A/N: Two in one day! Yippee!


	21. Always Right?

A/N: This did start out as a B/C fic, then turned into an A/H fic, then B/C again now a A/B fic, man that's confusing. Anyways, I never said I was going to keep any couples together or apart, so A/B may not last, haven't decided yet. This could very well turn out to be a B/C fic, or a B/C maybe ill even do a cross over who the hell knows. If you want to suggest something then be my guest.

* * *

He stood their not sure what to say, he'd never heard Ashley utter those words before, especially not to him in the way she meant it now. He wanted to say those words back, but something held them in.

A knock on the door alerted them that they were in a hospital, and that was probably a nurse. Within seconds the door opened, revealing, you guessed it a nurse.

"I'm sorry but visiting hours are over" she eyed both sensing that something had gone on between them, what ever it was, was going to have to wait till morning.

"Can he stay in here until I fall asleep?" Ashley asked the nurse, she already knew her answer before the nurse gave it.

"Only till then" the nurse closed the door behind her.

Ashley very clumsily climbed into bed, and laid on her back, the only un painful position. Her bandaged hands rested beside her on top of the blankets.

Bosco took the chair beside it, not being able to hold her hand was awkward, so he just laid his hand on the bed, he wasn't going to, inflict more pain on her, she'd had enough tonight already.

Her breathing soon slowed, Bosco got up, and kissed her forehead, he left in search of someone.

* * *

He found her in room 502, at the other end of the hall from Ashley.

She was sitting in a wheelchair attempting to balance on two wheels. This only angered him more. He strode over to her, he grabbed her out of the wheel chair and gripped her arms hard.

"You selfish Bitch!"

"What the hell?" he dug in deeper

"It bothers you that for once I am actually happy doesn't it?"

"Bosco what are you talking about?" he pushed her back down into her chair, he immediately saw the red marks on her skin.

"It was your fault she almost died" Hayden sat silently watching the scene play out before him

"She didn't have to follow me!"

"SHE LIKED THE THOUGHT OF YOU TWO BECOMING FRIENDS, THAT'S WHY SHE FOLLOWED YOU"

She got out of her chair, trying to stand eye to him, but she was shorter by a few inches.

"Ya well I doubt she wants to be friends, after what I did"

"What is that supposed to mean?" he said through a clenched jaw

"Nothing"

"Tell me" he grabbed her arms again

"NO" he stared into her eyes before letting her go again

"Your nothing but a criminal"

"Those are pretty harsh accusations you're throwing out"

"I still got information, lawyers would love to hear"

"Such a big threat for a mouth so small"

"Try me. Go ahead, call my bluff"

"Oh I will believe you will do it. But let me ask you this, how would Ashley feel after she knew you ratted me out?"

"You said it yourself, she may not want to be friends with you after this. If I have anything to do with it, she won't"

"So now your deciding who she can and cant be friends with?"

"Ya I guess I am" he gritted his teeth, he'd never wanted to hit someone as much as her right now, but he refused to hit a women, now matter how much they provoked him.

"I don't think Ashley would go for that" she stared him down,

"I guess we'll have to see wont we?" he said quietly Hayden had to strain his ears to hear.

"Where is she now? Did she get some sense and drop you?"

"She's sleeping, no thanks to you"

"Get away from me. I think I liked it better when you blamed me for your brothers death"

Bosco slammed the door when he left.

* * *

The moment she heard him coming to the door, she stepped back the best she could into another room with its door open and watch him stride off to the elevators looking like he was ready to murder someone. She made her way very slowly back to her room, spending most of the night thinking about who was to blame and all she could come up with was her, she had locked them in there, even if it was accidental. She wondered if Arson knew already what had caused the fire in the first place. She would have to make a trip down to her house once she was out of this place.

What Bosco had done for her, pained her and yet a sense of pride came over her, when he was being protective of her, but that wasn't the point, he'd overstepped the boundaries. And she wasn't going to let him get away with it either.

She'd just managed to doze off when he came in carrying flowers, her eyes protested not wanting to open, maybe she'd pretend she was sleeping so he would leave, but her eyes opened. His face lit up making her recall the conversation her and Cruz had last night

'The way he looks at you, his eyes light up whenever you walk into a room' 

"Morning Sunshine" he wore a big grin, she didn't know how he could smile when all she wanted to scream out how much pain she was in, the medication was starting to wear off, a dull pain had started growing in her hands and ankle. She managed a small smile and he noticed how it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"You look tired, did you get enough sleep?" he sat the flowers down on the tray at the foot of the bed, then moved himself to the chair beside her bed, pulled it closer to the bed and plopped down.

"I slept fine, the med's are starting to wear off" his smile became a frown and he looked deep in thought

"Do you want me to go get a nurse?" his eyes never leaving one of the bandaged hands, thinking of what could be under their, he made the mistake of grabbing her hands, he didn't know, he only hoped that didn't slow down the healing.

"No it's fine"

"Are you sure?" he half rose out of the chair

"Yes, sit down" she attempted to adjust herself into a more comfortable position but she couldn't use her hands so she gave up. She really wasn't in the mood to have a heart-to- heart so she chose safe topics like the weather, asking him what kind of flowers their were, if he got the mail and groceries. His answers were one or two words, at least she tried. The more time that passed the more the pain became more intense; finally she couldn't take it anymore.

"Could you go get the nurse for me? I'd do it myself" she held up her hands, he nodded and disappeared out the door.

She was lost deep in thought about how she was going to bring it up, she couldn't very well say 'I'm flattered that you are protective of me, but don't do it again, I'm a big girl' that wasn't exactly tea conversation.

"This gentleman says that you're in pain" her eyes snapped to the nurse in front of her, who at the moment was in her personal space. She nodded. Hoping her answer would get the nurse away from her, it didn't the nurse came even closer and injected a needle into her IV. She felt the drugs almost instantly taking the pain to intense, to dull to non-existent.

"This will also make her drowsy, so I suggest you come back another time" Bosco didn't like that idea but left soon after. Within minutes of him leaving she fell into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

Ashley was released later that day after she woke up and was fitted for crouches, they were a pain in the ass, she didn't understand why she just couldn't limp everywhere it was quicker and gave her the use of her hands but the doctor told her she was to use these. For six weeks, then depending how healed her ankle was she could stop using them a week after the cast was taken off. Just another damn inconvenience.

By the third week she had grown fed up with him, he didn't bring it up about what he'd done and he had also grown more moody as the days progressed, she said it halfway through supper one day, he was on his dinner break, his partner for the day at the deli across the seat.

"I don't need defending, I followed her into the closet" he dropped his fork and looked at her.

"Cruz tell you?"

"No"

"So it was Hayden then"

"No"

"Which one was it, they're were the only ones in there"

"I was outside listening"

"How much did you hear?" suddenly loosing his appetite he pushed his plate away

"Every word" he looked down at the abandoned plate in front of him, he remained silent so she started again

"Why are you always blaming someone for something they couldn't control?" "Cruz was upset, _I _followed her in there, _I _let the door shut behind me, the door knob came off in _my _hand first, so don't go blaming her for she didn't start" he reached into his pocket and laid money on the table and rose, he looked at her one final time and walked out. Thankfully her bandages had been taken off earlier that morning, she picked up her crouches and tried to catch up but he was already in the car pulling away from the curb when she reached the sidewalk. She was thankful that her left ankle had broken, meaning she could still drive. She was at the station in record time. Her crutches were more of a hassle than useful but she took them out and hopped her way into the precinct.

* * *

Chaotic noise met her, she suddenly missed all this, she'd had a rough couple of months and couldn't wait to jump in again. She hobbled over to the front desk, the Sgt greeting her warmly.

"Have you seen Bosco?"

"He came in about ten minutes ago with a perp, should be in lock up" Lock up was up the stairs great.

Cruz came in and saved her,

"Hey Ashley, what are you doing here?" she started writing things on the sheets the desk Sgt had just given her.

"Looking for a pig-headed idiot"

"Haven't seen him"

"I know what happened between you two, I told him that I didn't need him to protect me"

"He doesn't seem to think so"

"Ya well we all know how much he uses his brain" Cruz smiled and signed the last document, handing the documents back.

"You know where he is?"

"Ya in lock up" "Ya I know its up the stairs"

"Here let me help" she reached out and took hold of Ashley's elbow. They were half way up when he came down, ignoring both of them. She turned and was helped back down the stairs; he was at the front desk doing something. Cruz made herself scarce.

"Bosco"

"Yes?" his voice tinted with anger, he didn't look at her

"Why do you always run off, when someone's right and you know it?"

* * *

"And here we have two members of the morning shift, however Boscorelli is on afternoons, and Ryan's is out on injury" the Lt told two people Ashley had never seen before, Jessica Black and Shane Carter.

"Officers, I would like you to-"

"NOT NOW" they both said together, neither looking up, Bosco focused on the papers in front of him and Ashley on him. Bosco shut the folder and walked off up a different set of stairs. She followed him with the crutches until she got to the bottom of the stairs.

"For fuck sakes" she threw the crutches aside and started up the stairs.

"Your doing it again" she said to half the precinct as she made it up the stairs. She pushed the locker room door open, it was unusually quiet and then she heard why, loud bangs coming from the back of the room.

"Bosco?" she said receiving no reply she limped over to find him kicking a garbage can. She didn't say anything, she stood their letting him get his frustrations out on the garbage can, glad that it wasn't flesh and bone he was hitting.

"Bosco" she said softly this time, he stopped in mid kick and looked at her, she'd never seen so much fear in his eyes it scared her.

"When you were in there, it scared the hell out of me, which scared the hell out of me"

Surprisingly enough she understood that, that was about the closet thing he was going to say about his feelings towards her, he already said he loved her but she knew he wouldn't say it again, he wasn't the kind to flaunt it.

"I'm right here" now she knew why the doctor had told her to use the crutches, it hurt. She sat down on the bench; she hadn't seen before and stretched both legs.

"But at the time, you weren't"

"I didn't know there was going to be a fire when I went in there, hell I didn't even know I was going to get locked in there, it was funny at first cause Cruz looked like she was about to strangle me" he half smiled, Gotcha, with the smile it told her that he wasn't mad at her anymore, he picked up the dented can and sat it upright, he then sat beside her on the bench.

He slouched; his head bent, shoulders sunk and he stared at his hands. She wrapped her arm around him, he leaned into her, his head on her chest, his arms came around her, she heard quiet sobbing and wrapped her other arm around him, comforting him the best way she could.

* * *

A/N: I have decided to do a cross over, can you guess with what show? 


	22. Time Is All That's Needed

A/N: I feel sometimes that songs can say what words cant, so hence why I have a song in here, She's my Kinda Rain by Tim McGraw. I also couldn't resist putting the new Default – You Can Count On Me in there too. I noticed their space fillers too, this is really just a space filler, not sure what's going to happen next but I have the whole day to think of that!

I also want to thank everyone who's reviewed it makes me feel special that so many of you like this story!

P.S. You'll find out which show I'm doing a cross over with in teh next couple of chapters.

* * *

Bosco being Bosco, he quickly righted himself and wiped away his tears, he left Ashley on the bench while he walked away, she heard water running and soon he returned to his position beside her. 

_She's my kind of rain  
Like love in a drunken sky  
She's confetti falling down all night  
She sits quietly there  
Like water in a jar_

He let out a long breath, basking in the silence; she took his hand and laced it with hers, and laid her head on his shoulder  
"Your trembling"  
"Never felt this way before"

_Says baby why you trembling like you are  
So I wait and I try  
I confess like a child_

He stared at their intertwined hand, a gesture that wasn't as big as kissing, or joining bodies but it had the same effect on him. If he lost her, he didn't know what he would do.  
"I'm glad I could be the first"

_She's my kind of rain  
Like love from a drunken sky  
Confetti falling down all night  
She's my kind of rain_

She'd be his only if he had anything to do with it. The door swished open, they immediately let go and he slid down a bit. He wasn't going to start conversation; the person would know something was up. Faith walked over, well she waddled over, she had to be at least six months along

"Sorry to interrupt but I need to clear up a few things about your statements" why would Faith be working an arson case? Well it could be Major Case material; four people were dead and a building in ruins. Wasn't it a little to late for them to be asking about statements now?

"I'll be right out, as soon as I find a way down" Ashley smiled at her, getting up was the easy part, getting down was the hard part. Faith smiled, looked at Bosco then waddled out the door.

"My crutches are at the bottom of the stairs, would you mind getting them for me?" he did something better, he stood up took of one of her hand to what she thought was to help her up but he bent down and threw her over his shoulder.  
"Bosco put me down" she half begged, half pleaded  
"No" he carried her like that all the way to where Faith was and left her alone.

It hit you pretty hard once you realized that you loved a person and was willing to die for them, if something happened to them you would never be the same. A bunch of emotions just came out of nowhere and enwrapped you until you could barely breath. Until you admitted it, then it was like a warm blanket on a cold night.

_She's the sunset shadows  
She's like Rembrandt's light  
She's the history that's made at night  
She's my lost companion  
She's my dreaming tree  
Together in this brief eternity  
Summer days winter snow  
She's all things to behold_

How the hell could he forget the words she whispered to him in bed, when she wanted him to let go _'Bosco I'm pregnant' _was she really serious or was that a tactic to get him off her, knowing he would let her go right after the words escaped her mouth? She came out the precinct doors crutches and all, a fellow cop who was coming in held the door for her, and wished her to have a good day, she laughed and wished him the same.

"Hey" her spirits seemed higher than before, her smile reached her eyes and about ten feet about her too, how was she like this when he was ready to explode, he more or less poured his heart out to her and she had what said '_I'm glad that I could be the first' _who the hell says that? Obviously she does.

"Are you pregnant?" she almost burst out laughing but kept it down to a giggle

"Where'd this come from?" her face becoming serious

"The night of the party"

"Ohh, no I just said that cause I had to pee" he couldn't help feel a little disappointed when she had said no.

_She's my kind of rain  
Like love from a drunken sky  
Confetti falling down all night  
She's my kind of rain_

"What you said before in the locker room, it's hard for me to open up and share my feelings, my past didn't really want to but I did it anyways, this time emotions are involved and…" her voice trailed off

"I can wait" he'd wait until the day he died if he had to just so he could say she loved him again.

"Can you really?" she stood beside him and leaned over the railing, she watched the cars and people past

"Of course I can" that touched her, he was willing to wait until she was ready most guys didn't you had to say it back when they said it. She knew men had a hard time saying their feelings a male macho ego thing, what ever it was and knowing that he put that aside and said it pulled at her heart strings.

_So I wait and I try  
I confess all my crimes_

"You wanna get something to eat someone I was having lunch with walked out, leaving me to chase after them"

"You seem to follow people around"

"I know but I end up fixing the problems don't I?" she slid her arm through his, and once again laid her head on his shoulder, she was tried, it had been an draining day, and a little cast didn't help matters any. Speaking of which her medication was wearing off.

"I think I just wanna go home"

"Ok"

"We can grab some food on the way if you want"

"Yes please" to add effect her stomach growled

"Well food it is" he let go so she grabbed her crutches and they walked off in search of food.

* * *

She'd been out of her cast for two and off the crutches for a one week. Today was her first day back and it felt like it was the first day of school, with butterflies in her stomach. 

"Quit worrying its going to be fine" easy for him to say, he had worked the full time she was gone.

"I have no idea where I'm going"

"You shouda asked the last time you were in there"

"I had other things on my mind that day" he remember the day quite well, she'd taken him out back and showed him a good time, he loved it they were almost caught but someone had shut the door, and never returned.

"Well they always say surprise is the best attack"

"Who always says that?"

"I don't know"

* * *

She was glad that Bosco had been moved permanently to the third at least she would be either partnered with him or seen him throughout the shift. 

"Ryan's your in Anti-Crime and Boscorelli your with Black" well that question was answered but another rose, why was he with the new rookie they shunned the day they were fighting, rookies usually went on foot patrol for the first couple of months. She made her way up to Anti-Crime glad that she was back doing something she liked.

"Welcome back Ryans" was the first words Cruz said when she had opened the door

"Thanks" she glanced at the coffee cup wondering how many the Sgt already had. The cup in question was brought to her lips and she drank.

"Nothing new really except partner change" ok now who was she working with

"Ok"

On cue the door opened revealing the other rookie Shane Carter oblivious to her, he walked right past her to Cruz

"Sgt, he's not budging" she glanced over the papers he handed her, deep in thought

"Ryans I want you to meet your new partner Shane Carter he transferred from the 73rd" only then did he turn around and take inventory of her, he had bedroom eyes, any girl would melt at the knees if he looked at them the right way, she wasn't going to fall for it.

Ashley nodded; Carter was waiting for Cruz to reply. She handed the file to Ashley

"Your case now" Ashley took it

"You can fill me in on the way" she left and Carter followed her out,

"Guy's selling drugs but wont budge who he got it from"

"All in the way you talk to him"

* * *

She opened the door, he wasn't bad looking but wasn't good either, he was in desperate need of a shave. She sat down opposite to him and laid out the file in front of her. 

"Hey good looking, how about I show you a real good time?"

"How about you tell me who you got the drugs from or you leave without testicle?"

"Is that a threat officer?"

"Whoops did I say that out loud? Silly me" she gave him a hundred watt-smile, she could tell he was going to tell her. She leaned over the table allowing him a chance to see down her shirt. He shifted so he could get a better view and she sat back.

"Trying to look at something?" she asked him, she slid the file forward

"Better?" the guy cleared his throat and shifted.

"Why become someone's bitch when you don't have to?"

"I ain't becoming someone's bitch"

"They'd like a pretty boy like you" he started talking

"That was really good what you did" Carter said as they were walking back  
"All it needed was a women's touch" off she went in search of coffee

* * *

"Boy am I glad this day is over" Bosco said to no one particular as he stood changing. Ashley already ready came up to him and leaned against the locker beside his. 

"Why do you say that?" she said amusingly

"Got paired with a rookie"

"Black I take it?"

"How'd you guess?"

"I got Carter" he reached in to grab his duffel bag

"Hey Bosco I few of us are going out for drinks wanna come?" Ashley sensed that if Bosco wanted it Jessica would make that a private invitation, Bosco closed his locker revealing Ashley, Jessica's face went ten shades of red.

"No I'm busy. Maybe another time"

"You ready?" he asked Ashley, ignoring Jessica

"Ya" they walked out together leaving Jessica with her embarrassment.

* * *

He came out of the shower to find a sleeping Ashley lying on the couch. Wicked fantasies ran though his mind. Behave. The sight of her did funny things to his insides and deep down he knew she felt the same way. He just had to wait. All he ever did was wait. 

_I know that life ain't always good to you.  
I've seen exactly what it's put you through  
Thrown you around and turned you upside down and so you  
You got to thinking there was no way out  
You started sinking and it pulled you down  
It may be tough you've to get back up  
Because you know that life ain't over yet_

_I'm here for you so don't forget  
You can count on me  
Cause' I will carry you till you carry on_

He hoped that she knew she could tell him anything, and wouldn't judge her, who was he to judge, he had problems of his own, still did for that fact, he still didn't think that Ashley knew the extent of his feelings, or she did and trying to find a way to break it to him gently that she didn't feel the same way. He bent down over her

"Ashley" he called to her softly

"Mm?" she didn't move

"Come on wake up"

"Mmmhmmm"

"I cant carry you I'm wearing a towel"

"Then take the towel off" she snuggled into the couch more, she didn't have a clue what he was saying, she was out of it.

_  
Anytime you need someone  
Somebody strong to lean on  
Well you can count on me  
To hold you till the healing is done  
And every time you fall apart  
Well you can hide here in my arms  
And you can count on me  
To hold you till that feeling is gone_

He went into the bedroom to throw a pair of boxers on, she'd give him hell if he let her sleep on the couch all night, she'd wake up with one hell of a sore back and sore neck. He went back to rescue his damsel in distress only to find the couch empty, then he heard tinkering in the kitchen.

"I thought you were asleep"

"Couldn't have been that much asleep"

"So you don't remember?"

"Telling you to take of your towel so you could carry me? Of course I do" she gave him a wicked grin, sending a message that she thought those very same wicked thoughts he had thought only moments before and he happily followed her into the bedroom.

_I wonder why nobody's waiting on you  
I'd like to be the one to pull you through your darkest times  
I'd love to be the light that finds you  
I see a silver lining on your cloud  
I'll pick you up whenever you fall down  
Just take my hand and I will help you stand  
Because you know that life ain't over yet  
I'm here for you so don't forget_

_You can count on me._


	23. Are You Ever Really Prepared?

A/N: Well not much emotion involved between Ashley and Bosco and their shall I say "budding" relationship. Afairly long flashback, happenscant tell you what of just read on. Has anyone else heard a song and tried to create a chapter out of it? Well this is sorta like that but I had this whole thing set up before I discovered the song. I'm The One by Seether. I've also discovered that I had already named her sister Racheal and now her daughters that name too. Oops. So I'm going to keep her sisters name Racheal, and now her daughters name is Dakota. The flashbacks are in italics and the song is in the bold italics. To liven things up a bit, I added some Maroon 5 in there, Shiver. I also thrown in True by Ryan Cabrera for the hell of it.

* * *

_Flashback_

_She sat staring out the window in the parlor, watching the storm rage on. The wind whipped the trees to and fro, the lightning lit up the room only for a brief second allowing her to see why she was sitting in this room tonight. The gun. She reached for her drink, her father's secret stash, he thought he was the only one who knew where it was, and somehow he didn't notice it go down. He was too drunk to notice, all he did notice was when he was getting low on booze and drugs. _

_**Here she's coming and she's drunk again  
**__**She's only seventeen**_

_She welcomed the liquid amber burning her throat that she had long ago grown accustomed to, this would be the last time, she saw how her sister was after every time their father spent quality time together as he put it. Really it was just a cover-up to what was really going on, he was raping Rachael. How would his buddies like that? To know that there friend was beneath them. He could face prison time if anyone found out, but he would get off, he had the money to do that, the scandal would bring press, even if it was bad it was free advertisement for his business. He would make money off of this. She wouldn't have that he'd hurt to many people already._

_The front door opened, for a brief second allowing a person to enter and the storm to come in before the door slammed shut. Daddy's home. Stumbling drunk and high at that. He fumbled around for a light, finding one he flicked it on, her presence surprised him but he recovered quickly. _

"_Hey Pumpkin" he bent down to kiss her cheek, nearly falling on her as he did, he hadn't seen the gun yet. The moment the door opened he had sat it beside her within reach, so he wouldn't know her intentions just yet. _

"_Where's your sister?" somewhere you cant hurt her_

"_At a friend's" it took a little bit for it to sink in but then did _

"_How about we spend some quality time together?" she wasn't about to let him do that _

_**Her daddy said  
"well that's enough of that  
**__**come be my little queen"**_

"_How about another time? I'm a bit tired" he ran his hand up her leg, why had she decided to wear a skirt? Why couldn't she have changed?_

_**And now he's touching her wrong again  
**__**He's gonna give her disease  
**__**He never wanted it anyway  
**__**He only does as he please**_

"_It will only take a few minutes" he knew that she knew, he wasn't trying to hide it. She wondered how her and her sister was conceived it all he could go was for a couple minutes._

"_No" she said firmly, that resulted with her getting back handed against the mouth. She tasted the coopery taste of blood, it was only moments before he would try something again, and she'd be ready for him. Her fingers touched the cool metal, giving her a small sense of hope that she could do this. _

_**Here he's coming and he's drunk again  
**__**He's on amphetamines  
**__**Scratch his nails down the other leg  
**__**'Cause you're my little queen  
**__**And now he's touching her wrong again  
**__**She's only trying to get by  
**__**He never wanted it anyway  
**__**He never soils the child**_

_His hand went to her breast and started caressing the flesh through the thin material, her hand gripped around the but of the gun, she'd seen so many people do it in movies, she had to squeeze the trigger not pull it, what was the difference. The moment came when he bent to capture his lips with hers, she squeezed the trigger, firing once, hoping that it was enough. His face going blank, his cold eyes staring at her, not really believing she'd just done what she did._

"_Payback's a bitch daddy" she said as he fell to the floor, clutching his chest. She wiped his blood off her face with a flick of her wrist.

* * *

_

She tossed and turned through the entire nightmare before she awoke with a jolt, in a cold sweat, tangled in sheets. Her breath came in deep rugged breaths. It was just a dream she told herself, but the dream was a memory that had happened. She had pulled the trigger and he had died by her hand. She glanced around the room trying to get her bearings, the room dark, the bed empty beside her, where was Bosco? She glanced at the clock, the alarm should have wakened her up hours ago, now all she had was half an hour to get ready before she had to leave.

"Bosco?"

"In the kitchen" he was already showered and dressed and at the moment eating a piece of toast along with a cup of coffee.

"Why didn't you wake me?"

"I tried, several time you were dead to the world" that wasn't like her, the slightest noise she was up.

"Weatherman says another scorcher, UV index is ten and recommending that anyone who can stay in, do it" a cops worst Mother Nature. They had to be out there patrolling the streets rain or shine, sleet or snow. A hundred degrees or thirty below.

"Makes you wonder what they did back in the day for heat doesn't it?" he sipped his coffee and shoved the last piece of toast in his mouth chewing waiting for her answer

"They didn't have heat like this back then, we have the green house effect to thank for this" she moved to the coffee maker, at least she wanted caffeine if had to hurry.

She had five minutes left, before they had to leave and for some strange reason Bosco was getting impatient, it was always her trying to hustle him out the door, and now he wanted to be early? Maybe for a little conference with Miss Black before shift started?

"Hey Hun?" she called out, he didn't know if it was a slip of the tongue that she had called him Hun or what but he liked it.

"Can you remind me to stop at the drug store on the way home?"

"Sure" he came up behind her in the bathroom "What for?"

"Birth control"

"Ok. Since you called me Hun does this mean I get to call you pumpkin" she stiffened, no one had called her that since, well that night

"No" the rooms atmosphere went from nice and warm to freezing in thirty seconds flat. She moved past him walking into the living room, she didn't say another word.

* * *

Not in the car ride over, not when they departed only when she saw the look on Cruz's face, a face that was distressed and terror. Her cell phone still opened in here hand

"What's wrong?" Ashley sat her coffee cup on the desk in front of her. Cruz wasn't looking at her but the screen behind her, about an accident on the freeway. Something must have knocked her back into reality because she suddenly glanced at Ashley.

"Hayden was on that freeway" the news was showing the accident that had just happened moments before, no cop had responded yet. Then she saw it, or what was left of it, Hayden's car. It didn't take much more for both women to be running out of the precinct at top speed. Making people stop and stare, and trying to guess where the two were going.

The traffic jam started about a mile and half back, luckily they were in a cop car, and could very easily pull into the shoulder and sped past all of them, alerting the angry drivers something was definitely wrong.

"Was Hayden on the phone with you?"

"He was breaking in and out until there was this loud noise and it went out completely." Cruz didn't even sound like herself, she sounded like a little kid, who knew something bad had happened but didn't know what yet.

She didn't know how they managed it but somehow they were the first ones there, she had to think why they were, the accident had happened a while ago and yet no one had responded.

* * *

It was one big jumbled pile of metal, at least ten cars involved. One car's tires were still turning if that was possible. There was glass everywhere, upon broken pieces of metal that had come off during impact. A buses had already been called along with the fire and rescue, all they could do was wait and see how many were injured and how many were – dead. That's something she didn't like, seeing a dead body, she didn't know how something could be dead and yet you could see the thing right in front of you.

She flashed her flashlight in between the cars finding one alive one dead. An elderly man had a cut along his skull; well his 20-year-old passenger was dead. The saddest thing was that the man knew that, she guessed, his granddaughter was dead and he had caused it. She found three more dead, a whole family- the mom, dad and the little boy that couldn't have been anymore than eight all dead. Their car barely a car anymore. She found the car she was dreading, Hayden's car, she was mistaking taking this task Cruz had gone off and secured the area, after a little argument of course.

At first what she saw was unsettling but then the body moved and coughed and she let out the breath she didn't know she had been holding.

"Hayden stay still, help is on its way" he let out a cough and remained still. She checked four more cars all occupants dead, how she didn't know. That made the death count up to 15, one car had a driver in it while another had two, the rest had four in them two more families gone. Two more cars to check which meant, these were the two that caused it. She breathed in slowly and made her way over to the other car, she wasn't prepared for what she saw. The driver was David, she got in the best he could and checked for a pulse and found none. Her stomach dropped, she was about to be sick but kept it down and moved on. The car that had the most damage and was away from everyone one else. The car that had started the accident was half gone, the back end was now in the front. And in between was a woman driver, she crept slowly towards the small metal knowing that who ever was in that car wouldn't be walking away from it, if they were even alive and it was a very small chance they were.

She could hear the sirens coming from all directions; help had come for the living, and the morgue for those who hadn't. She had a lot of funerals to go to, it was a rule of hers if the person was dead and she was a part of team that responded she would go to the funeral kind of a way to pay her respects and try to get to know what type of person they were.

She couldn't bring herself to take the final steps to see the final person, but she knew she must. She took one step forward, then another until she reached the door and looked. Just like seeing David in his car, she wasn't prepared for what she saw. She saw Faith.

She shut her eyes, no it couldn't be her, she opened them praying she would see someone else but she didn't, she saw Faith's body, the blood and the piece of metal coming out of her stomach. Their was no question about it, they were both dead. Faith and the baby. She shook herself out of what ever she was in, she had a job to do, she yelled to the paramedics that only two had lived, the elderly man and Hayden. Two out of eighteen How was that possible?

Her ex-husband was dead, she hated him but never had she wished that he would die. She dreaded having to tell Bosco, she had no idea how he would react. She wanted to get away from it all, someone was shaking her and she looked up. Cruz her mouth was moving but she couldn't understand what she was saying, then the sound came back and she heard, people yelling, machines working trying to free the people, the sirens and music, coming from the cars. And lastly she caught the tail end of Cruz's question

"…ok?" she didn't have to hear the whole question to know what she had been asked.

"Hayden's fine" relief washed over Cruz. Ashley shrugged out of Cruz's grasp. Images flashing through her mind, the lightning, the gun firing, her father's face, it overwhelmed her until she had to sit down. She watched the rescuers get the elderly man out, and put him on a gurney and run towards the waiting ambulances.

* * *

Darkness slowly crept over them all, the sun slowly turning to dusk and shadows; lights were brought in to clear away the rest of the mess. She helped the best way she could but her and Cruz were no longer needed and so they left. She really didn't feel like talking to anyone, shocked to see that a part of her had still loved David, not in the sense that they could ever get together but maybe as her first love or something. Had his sister been told yet? His sister was the closet living relative, his parents both dead long ago.

She wasn't sure how long she had been sitting in front of his locker, knowing that he would never be coming to unlock it again, never taking anything out to change into.

"How could you?" a voice almost yelled as the person came through the door

"How could you not call me and tell me? I had to find out from someone else that she's dead!" he wasn't going to blame her for this, they had a protocol to follow, the family had to be contacted before anyone else. She remained silent, not sure if she could keep her voice steady.

"Huh? You sure made that Hayden was ok though" now he was accusing her of thinking more about a man, who had been in desperate need of medical attention, than calling him to tell him one of his ex girlfriends was dead. This wasn't going to happen here not now. She watched him, waiting to see if he was finished, from the looks of it he was.

"I never thought you would be the one to put yourself in front of others" she said dryly.

"Hayden was in the middle of the accident, Faith was dead, what the hell was I supposed to do? Drop everything just to call you? No doesn't work that way" she knew he knew that she had been right but it didn't like it. He walked away with out saying anything. Only to return seconds later to pull her into a mind blowing kiss then leaving quickly as he came.

* * *

He knew he shouldn't have done that but something inside him snapped once he learned that Faith was dead, and he took it out on her, he wouldn't have called her right away if it was someone she knew, he would wait until he knew for a fact the family had called, so he had no right to jump down her throat like he did. She just lost her ex-husband today, but what about him, he lost a woman he thought he loved for years only to be stabbed in the back by her getting pregnant with Miller. Why the hell did he have to go and mess up what he had going with Ashley? Hell she deserved it, running around, avoiding telling him either she loved him deeply or to get lost.

_**You build me up  
**__**You knock me down  
**__**Provoke a smile  
**__**And make me frown  
**__**You are the queen of run around  
**__**You know it's true

* * *

**_

Shift wasn't done for another couple of hours so he sat in the car half-listening to Black drone on about a date she had last night. He didn't care, and he still didn't know why she would tell him about it, they knew each other not even three weeks. He knew most of her life story from when he had listened. He'd never met a more boring person than her and yet she never shut up.

"Shut your fucking mouth" he'd finally had enough of her. He had something to settle, for once she had listened to him and kept her mouth shut as he dialed, the person picked up on the second ring.

"We need to talk now" the person gave him directions and he drove himself there, he gave strict orders to Black, to stay put and shut up if she knew what was good for her, and said it in a tone that meant business.

"What's so important that couldn't wait for another three hours?" the wind whipped around them blowing her hair around as she pulled her coat deeper around her, summer was slowly coming to an end and the nights were getting chillier.

"I'm sorry about everything, I had no right to accuse you or talk to you like that" this wasn't easy for him she could tell, he stared down at the ground.

"It's ok"

"No it's not I want you to know that I would never intentionally hurt you in any way" their was silence before she said anything.

"I know"

"Dammit, I.. I don't know ok, I feel like I'm on a roller coaster with no safety restraint"

_**I won't talk  
I won't breathe  
I won't move till you finally see  
that you belong with me**_

"Because of what?" her cheeks now rosy from the nipping wind

"How can you ask because of what?" he was doing it again and quickly calmed his temper

_**I'm weak  
it's true  
cause I'm afraid to know the answer  
do you want me too?  
Cause my heart keeps falling faster**_

"I told you soon ok?" she couldn't stand to see him hurting because of her but she couldn't bring herself to say it, she didn't know why.

_**I've waited all my life to cross this line  
to the only thing that's true  
so I will not hide  
it's time to try anything to be with you  
all my life I've waited  
this is true**_

"Are we supposed to go on hold until then?" he just wanted to take her into his arms, until he felt calm again. She looked at him tears filling her eyes on the brink of falling; it almost ripped his heart in two.

_**You don't know  
what you do  
every time you walk into the room  
I'm afraid to move**_

"No, not unless you want to" she looked up trying to get the unleashed tears to go away.

"Never" he held out his arms for her and she gladly walked into them holding on to as tightly as she could. The tears ran down her face freely onto his shirt, he just trying to calm her, gently rocked them.

"I'm so scared" she said between sobs

"Shh…It's ok"

Jessica couldn't see much from where she was sitting, she was too far away, she could only make out the shapes even though they were standing in a street lamp. She could tell the woman was wearing a brown jacket and was suffering greatly if Bosco had allowed her to step into his embrace. It pained her a little but she knew she could never have Bosco his heart belonged to someone else and always would.

"I'm so scared" she said again "That I'm going to do something that messes this thing up"

"I know you could never do that"

"But I always do, no relationship has ever lasted"

"We've lasted for six years"

"We hadn't been together not physically anyway"

"Hey look at me" he placed his hands on either side of her face and made her look at him

"Do you want this to end?" he looked into her eyes, she didn't meet his gaze. She shook her head.

"Good neither do I, now was that so hard?" he asked letting go, she laughed and dried her eyes

"No I guess not"

"Then its settled" he placed his hands on her shoulders and kissed her forehead, he paused before his lips touched hers. He greedily took everything she gave and then some.

She pulled away breathless

"We can't, we have work to do" he silently nodded and let go of her. Their jobs were never done. Always something to do. She walked away without another word into the darkness.


	24. AWOL!

A/N: Ya I made up this CSI guy, cross over to come soon. I don't own Grand Theft Auto either but I did use a name from it. I am NOT going to use all of the song, it's song about leaving, but that's not the cause with these two, the first few lines help with what I'm trying to get across My Worst Fear by Rascal Flatts

* * *

She'd learned a lesson; if you ever wanted to get out of work on time don't agree to do something with an hour left. She learned that the hard way, she was a handed a file containing at least a hundred pages and by the hour. She got the accident file, no clue how, it wasn't Anti-Crime's thing to deal with accidents but somehow she knew she had Cruz to thank who asked her would she do her a favour, another thing always ask the favour before you agree. Speaking of which after she was handed the file that almost weighed a ton, Cruz had disappeared, probably spending time with Hayden no doubt.

She didn't know if she wanted to know the whole deal about what was going on between them, maybe it was better if she didn't. Although she would never do something that Cruz did to her, to get a man, she sensed that Cruz had deep feelings for Hayden in some sick demented way of hers.

* * *

She armed herself with a few pens, a cup of coffee and paper prepared to make notes about things that didn't add up and hopefully find out what had actually caused the accident, she didn't know how many people would be upset once they learned who had caused the accident, but the evidence never lies, it's how you interpret it.

Two hours after her shift, the papers grew to two hundred pages; she had eighteen different piles, on for each person. With the kids she didn't have much except smiling photo's, and the birth and death certificate. And photo's of what ever was found in the car. The boxes with everything in the cars, which they could get out, were sitting besides her, having been just delivered. A never-ending process, so far she figured that most of them had just failed to stop in time sending them flying into the mess. On thing that didn't add up was how Faith's car was so smashed up yet all she hit was the side rail. She checked every picture; no one had any transfer of paint on their cars from here. She re-checked everything, and still came up with the same thing; either a car or cars were missing. She had a phone call to make.

She waited for the receptionist to pick up,

"CSI: Crime Lab"

"This is Officer Ryan's Is Ted Rosenberg in?

"One moment please" she was put on hold; the door opened admitting Bosco carrying two cups of coffees.

"Rosenberg"

"Yes this is Officer Ryan's I'm calling to ask you a few questions that maybe you can help me with"

"This about that accident on the Freeway?"

"Yes it is"

"Alright meet me at Denny's Coffee Shop on 33rd street and bring the photo's, say in twenty minutes?"

"Ok Thank you" she replaces the phone into its cradle and starts to gather up what she needs, completely forgetting that Bosco's there.

"You do know shift ended two hours ago right?" he asked her

"Two hours and twenty-nine minutes ago" she continues to gather them up, never looking up. She slid into her jacket, grabbing the file she almost walked out the door but stopped and walked over to where he was sitting.

"One of those for me?" she asked about the two coffees

"Ya" she takes ones and downs half of it in one gulp, and the rest in another ignoring the fact that it was burning her throat as it went down.

"Thank you" she plants a kiss on his lips and walks back to the door. She steps half way through it but stops again

"Wanna come?"

"Something's not adding up is it?" she adverts her eyes

"No" he gets up and follows her to the door.

"Shouldn't Cruz be handling this or someone else's department?" he questioned from the passenger seat

"If you haven't noticed Cruz is AWOL"

"Where you think she is?"

"One guess"

"Not jealous?" he said more curiously then in question form

"Why would I be? I have you" she risked a glance at him, he was smirking

She parked the car and got out file in hand.

* * *

"That was a complete bust," Bosco said as he climbed back into the car

"Not entirely. Did clear up a few things" their was definitely a another car who had caused the accident. She dropped Bosco of at their apartment; warmth filled her when she thought of their apartment. Promising that she would be home in a couple of hours.

She wasn't home when he went to bed around two hoping to catch her, but ended up falling asleep watching an infomercial. She wasn't there when he woke up there either or when he left to go for work. He did find her when he was in role call she walked in and stood beside the Lt, waiting to speak to him, freshly showered, her hair pulled back into a messy bun.

He tried to get her attention but she kept adverting his eyes. Waiting for the Lt attention. Wrapping up role call, everyone filed out, slowly he hung back trying to make small talk with others, until the Lt left leaving Ashley pouring over her information at the podium, he was the only one left in there with him. He looked around before moving closer just to reassure himself no one was watching, she had to be really out of it if she didn't notice him walk up behind her his warm breath against her neck.

"Have you slept?" she rearranged the papers bringing new ones to the front.

"No" she concentrated one the papers in front of her, but failing with every breath he placed on her neck.

"Why haven't you?"

"Too much work" his tongue darted out and tasted a pot below her ear.

"Cruz shouldn't have left you with all this work" he breathed in the scent of her; it made his heart beat faster, and the temperature to rise a few degrees.

"I really got to get back to work" she closed the file and turned around and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"I'll be home by midnight" she flashed her eyes wide and back down and kissed him.

The need to taste was becoming more powerful than he could handle and he deepened the kiss. He tasted faint mint and coffee, the combo made his blood boil. She pulled away

"I _really _have get back to work now" she quickly kisses him again, grabs her folder and leaves.

* * *

His worrying nerves settled once he heard the apartment door opening, and heard the familiar sound of the shower running, did he will himself to sleep, but sleep wouldn't come. He glanced at the clock, 2:29; she said she'd be home by midnight. This whole completely in love business was doing weird things that he only ever saw in movies. He wanted to know where she was all the time, but he didn't care call her, knowing that it would only push her further away. So he just casually dropped whenever he could to the desk Sgt wondering if the Anti-Crime team was in or expected in but haven't called. Who was he to know that she knew he was doing these things? The desk Sgt could tell her, on her way out or just as an icebreaker. Who the hell knew, but the moment she brought it up, he would know that his cover was blown. So far she hadn't, couldn't really decide if that was a good thing, or a bad one.

He didn't want to act like he had been waiting up for her so he waited until he heard the shower shut off and then an extra five just to be sure, before he entered the kitchen. Hair wet and awfully sexy in his shirt and her bottoms. His back against the counter, he watched her make food

"I didn't wake you did I?" she added mayonnaise to some weird looking contents of the bowl

"No" he said a little quietly, she trying to hide a smile, she knew he'd been waiting up

"What are you making?" he watched as she stirred the contents, as it all became one

"Tuna Fish, want some?"

"No I'm good" she slathered the contents onto two waiting pieces of bread, and tossed the bowl into the sink.

"Good, I wasn't going to give you any" she smirked and put the top two pieces of bread on and cut them in half. He grew hard just looking at her, he knew exactly what he was getting himself for Christmas, a hundred more shirts, she looked better in them than he did.

She at down at the table silently eating her sandwiches, she took a bit and got up, over the fridge, she was bent over looking at the contents when she was grabbed from behind and thrown up against the wall, her head hit the wall hard. She saw stars but that was quickly covered by Bosco's face coming up to hers. He pinned her up against the wall, pushing the air out of her, making it hard to breathe, she felt his arousal against her lower stomach, his lips on hers, his mouth tore from hers to taste her neck, it was getting hard to think, her appetite dissolved and another one grew. She cupped him hard, he gasped giving her all the encouragement she needed as her hand traveled up to his chest, trying to put some space between them so she could breathe. It worked to a point, she got air when he took of her shirt and started kissing the exposed skin, he kissed her skin until he met her bottom and slid the pants down her legs. His fingers traced every out line of her legs as he came back up and pinned her again. Her hands ran up his back, nails digging in leaving red marks, his tongue forced its way into her mouth, her nostrils filling with the scent of him, she couldn't keep a single thought in her head. He picked her up, encircling his legs around him, he teased her with his cock at her entrance back and forth before he slid himself in, he kept going harder and faster with each thrust.

Much, much later, Bosco sat his back against the wall, having just donned his pants, and her his shirt, she slid in between his legs, his fingers trailing along her thigh.

"What possessed you to do that?"

"I haven't seen you in a couple days"

"You saw me a couple of hours ago"

"Not like this I didn't" his fingers slipped and he felt the inside of her thigh

"Come get up I have to be at work early tomorrow"

He was sleeping soundly Ashley tucked in his arms, no matter how hard she tried to let sleep consume her but she couldn't sleep until got off what her chest

"Bosco, are you awake" he mumbled something incoherently so she took that as a no he wasn't.

"I love you Bosco" finally sleep consumed her.

* * *

True to her word she was up and gone by the time he got up at twelve. He showered and dressed in silence, there was no need to talk to himself or listen to music, he felt they were drifting apart and that he was powerless to stop it, he was happy for her, she really was doing something that she loved, but he couldn't help but think that her happiness was their downfall. In a way she was becoming Cruz letting her job run her life, and her moods became different too, she was more edgy and could fly off the handle at any given time, with just a casual word.

Maybe he could convince her to not go in so early one day, so they could spend a little time together, before they went in, some nights he came home so tired all he wanted to do was hit the sack, so he knew she would too although she wouldn't admit it.

The first problem he encountered was tracking her down, he'd been on shift for three hours and hadn't seen her once, but why would he? He wasn't in Anti-Crime, and they weren't working a similar case so he couldn't use that as an excuse, and he knew that she didn't want to make what they had public yet. That was ok with him, for the moment he didn't either, with it being a secret they weren't the subject of the gossip. This was his fifth time in the house three for bringing in a John, and the others just because he wanted to talk, but she had been away both times. Sixth's times the charm he thought as he walked into the house as he had done an hour ago. The desk Sgt didn't even need to be asked anymore he just shook his head yes or no as Bosco passed him, his heart skipped a few beats when the Sgt nodded his head, and butterflies came into his stomach as she came down the stairs talking on her cell. He quickly walked in front of her blocking her path; she said a few words into her phone that he didn't understand, when the hell had she learned Spanish?

"Hey what's up?" she said in between outbursts of Spanish into the phone

"I just wanted to ask you something" she nodded her head and continued to speak in Spanish, then she snapped her phone shut quickly.

" Can it wait? I'm on my way out" desire flashed through her eyes and he felt himself stirring.

"Ya Absolutely"

"I'll be around later, just try catch me sometime. You better go your partner's waiting" she motioned her head to a partner standing behind him, he guessed. Right now, what he wanted to do was plant a big one on those firm luscious lips but thought against and left.

* * *

Ashley came into Hayden's room carrying a box with the lid off, and flowers inside the box, sitting on papers, Cruz sitting in the visitor's chair beside the bed while Hayden slept.

"Bad time?" Ashley whispered

"No" Hayden replied and opened his eyes, he moved up a little bit but she could tell it was hurting him and he stopped.

"What's in the box?" Hayden asked when Ashley had reached the end of the bed, and leaned forward into trying to pry what was in the box himself.

"These are for Cruz to sign and these" she took the flowers that were already in a vase and water "are for you" she sat them down, on an empty place on the nightstand beside the bed. And placed the box beside Cruz, who started going through the pile immediately, as if just realizing how much work she was actually missing. Ashley slipped her a pen, as she reached for another.

"Somehow I gather this isn't a personal visit"

"No it's not"

"Anti-Crime somehow" she looked at Cruz who was slowly turning a dull pink "got the accident. Everyone else had something to do, so I offered to take it" she smiled knowing that Cruz was not liking this, but she didn't say it was forced upon her now did she?

"I just have a few questions I need clearing up"

"Alright shoot" he clapped his hands together and rubbed his hands together

"Tell me anything you can about what you remember about the crash"

"I was on my way to court, talking to Ritza here" Cruz blushed a darker pink this time "when the guy in front me slammed on his breaks, I did too, I remember looking out and seeing this guy on the side of the road, looked like he had a skateboard coming out of a backpack. Then I don't remember much after that"

"What'd the guy look like?"

"He looked like a punk, you know the Mohawk hair, piercings ripped clothes, he had dark hair not sure what colour, it was spiked up into four spikes though, his nose was rather large too"

"That's a lot to remember for only a quick glance"

"I work with cops, I've picked up a few things"

"Ok. I think that's it, if I need anything else, I'll be back"

"I'll be here"

The older man said the same thing about seeing someone on the shoulder moments before; the guy let her in on a little secret, he only remembered because his granddaughter said he remembered him from school. The guy only remembered his first name Scott.

She returned to Hayden's room to pick up the box of reports, and just other things that were really important but needed to be signed, she gave Hayden her word that she would visit the next time she was up this way. She would try her hardest to make sure she wasn't, she didn't do good with people in hospitals, never had, not since she saw her grandmother with so many machines going into her that she could of swore she was a circuit board to a computer. She had died two weeks to the day of her arrival to the hospital, and Ashley made it a point to stay the hell away from hospitals the best she could.

* * *

When she walked into the precinct Lamb, the desk Sgt nodded at her, telling her that Bosco had been looking for her, all secretly of course she wasn't to know, she felt kinda special knowing that he cared about her well being and all. She never had anyone do that before, worry about why she wasn't home on time, or where she was, if she was ok, or not. She dropped the box of signed papers off at the front desk and went back to look at the photo's, she had a hunch she just couldn't shake. She looked at one photo in particular, Faith's tires, her hunch stood corrected, all the tires were flat as a pancake. The picture gave her a new rush of adrenaline, and a huge grin, she was on the verge of solving this case and it good.

Bosco made another unnecessary stop at the house again and got another nod by Lamb and once again she was coming down the stairs. This time walking faster than normal, he had to grab her arm to get her attention.

"You wanted to talk that's right" the memory coming back to her,

"If your not busy"

"Could we walk and talk?" he thought it over a minute then nodded.

They started walking out, he didn't want to say anything when everyone else could over hear and their once so secret affair would be the talk of the house.

She stood against the car door, arms across her chest, waiting to hear what couldn't wait until they were at home.

**_Last night you gave me a kiss  
You didn't know it, but I was awake when you did  
You were quiet, you were gonna let me sleep  
So I just laid there pretending to be  
You said some things you didn't know I could hear  
And the words "I love you" never sounded so sincere_**

****

He heard those four words that she whispered to him, when he thought he was sleeping he had never wanted to say guess what I'm not sleeping like you thought I was and that I love you too, maybe even more. But he remained quiet and fell asleep shortly after she did. He opened his mouth to speak when the devil herself came out.

"There you are Bosco"

"Dammit" Bosco cursed under his breath, Ashley smiled hearing that, so maybe he didn't like her after all, she walked over to them, she reminded Ashley of Britney Spears, fake blond, fake tits and abs to die for.

"I've been looking all over for you" _she had been looking for her wittle Bosco-Wosco and couldn't find him _Ashley laughed as she got into the car and started her up. Bosco climbed in, the passenger seat leaving Black standing outside the car.

"Bosco what are you doing?"

"We need to talk"

"You have job to do with Britney"

"Who?"

"Black"

"I'm not leaving until we do" she had two choices, tell him to get the hell out of her car, and run the risk of ruining what ever they had or avoid it for the time being and invite them both to what she was doing. She waved Jessica in, look a like Britney eagerly climbed in the back seat.

"This is so cool, I feel like we're in like a cop show or something you know like that show Third Watch it was too bad it got cancelled" she felt like shooting the woman already and they hadn't been in the car for five minutes yet.

By the time the twenty mark, she really was very tempted to unholster her gun and use it on herself that way she wouldn't have to go to jail for killing a fellow officer.

"Do you ever shut up?" he was impressed it took him three weeks to tell her to shut the hell up and it only took her not even twenty minutes.

She pulled over on the shoulder of the highway, Jessica sulking in the car, Ashley was careful she didn't get hit as she made her way over to the side of the where the tire tracks were.

"Ok if I just cause someone's tires to blow, where would throw the evidence that could be tied to me?" she asked him

"Well I'm not going to throw them back out in traffic, so my only bet is over the rail"

They looked over the rail into the water below them. She searched around for a rock to thrown down below seeing where the tack band would land. The rock hit the water with a splash

"Gotcha" she said to the water below.

"Would you mind telling me what you're doing at the house when you have no perp? I recall when we were partners you never once wanted to go in if we didn't have to even when you were dating Faith" BUSTED!

"I don't know what you're talking about" he tried to play it cool but his face was giving him away, he could tell his face was turning a dull pink, only she could make him blush.

"I'm flattered but you can call me, instead of having Lamb tell you, if I'm in or not" so much for secrecy.

"Where's Carter?" why the change of subject Bosco Wosco?

"Running made up errands I gave him why?"

"Just wondering"

"He calls me every half hour to see if I'm ok and to let me know that he is too" that didn't help settle his stomach any but at least its something.

"Do you know how much I want to take you somewhere and have my way with you?" it was her turn to blush. She didn't.

"To run my hands over every part of your body and end up somewhere only one person should see" she cleared her throat and moved away from the rail back to the car.

Bosco saw the car coming towards them at the last minute and pushed Ashley out of the way, she grabbed onto the railing and turned her head and saw the car hit Bosco head on, before driving off.

A/N: Did you get my clues for what's coming up? Not Bosco getting hit. Crossover coming in two chapters.


	25. Twisted

A/N: I warn you now; things are going to get very twisted, every man/woman for themselves. The unthinkable happens. Not saying anything else, just read. A little tidbit, I'm running out of injuries.

* * *

It all happened so fast one minute, he was telling her that he wanted to touch her everywhere, the next he was pushing her out of the way from an oncoming car. She wasn't hurt physically, not like Bosco who had been in the O.R. for hours now; she only had cuts and scrapes from rubbing against concrete rail. They would go away in a day or two.

So many people had shown up, once they heard Black call in a ten-thirteen, she didn't know why she did that, the risk was over now, Bosco was laying on the ground blood everywhere. Ashley had run over to see the damages, so much blood, it was everywhere even on her. She hadn't spoken a word to anyone except the nurses who asked her if she hurt anywhere. They'd taken some blood, just as a precautionary they told her, a precautionary for what?

She would be in trouble when the Capt. found her; she put his an officers life at risk unnecessary. But if it had been her, how long would she had to wait if she went alone? Carter had just checked in with her, before she left and told her that he wouldn't be calling for another hour. Would the passers-by notice her? It was hard to say. They were traveling speed at an excess of 80 mph. One second and they passed over her.

That's why she sat in the bathroom in a stall at the end, with her feet up on the toilet so no one would see her in there, she messed up big time. But hiding here wasn't going to give her news about Bosco, that was something she would have to settle with, she didn't know if she could face anyone with out crying, she tried seven times now to go out but every time she got up to unlock the stall a new batch of tears would come again.

An invisible force was out to get them, everyone of them had been hurt now, first Cruz with her gunshot and herself being beat up and broken ankle, Hayden with the accident and now Bosco may die because she needed to see something that she already knew. He was hit in the same place that Faith was killed, how weird was that?

When would it all end, when would she wake up, and when would life go back to normal? When could her and Bosco go on living their lives the way they were, in secret no one knowing except two others that went on behind the closed doors of her apartment. She couldn't speak for Black, if she knew about them or not, she hadn't worn the brown jacket since that night, they had been standing in a street lamp, they had been far enough away so that she couldn't see their faces but what they were wearing.

Enough hiding she had to face the problem at hand, if she was fired so be it, at least she knew the case would be solved, or would it? She was the only one who had time to do it, and with her gone no one would and the little bastard would go free. That's the justice system for ya.

The Capt. Was yelling at Black in front of everyone else, she really didn't hear it but should hear the voices, as she walked closer she could understand what was being said, and Black was taking it all in, her eyes moist but not one single tear had fallen, her eyes were red and a bit puffy but she hadn't been crying for a while anyone could tell.

"And exactly what were you doing in the car while Ryans and Boscorelli were outside the vehicle?" Black looked like she had been caught in the headlights of a semi and she was a deer. It was time for her to take up her side of the blame so she stepped in.

"She was on an order sir" the vein in the Capt.'s neck was throbbing making you wonder when it would burst.

"And who's order was that?"

"It was mine, I told her to stay in car, didn't need to endanger her unnecessarily" he was digesting the news, Black had stood her ground, still looking like a deer in the headlights, but lessen frightened now.

"You and her are both officer's, you do not out rank her or have you forgotten that?"

"No sir, I haven't and I don't know why she listened, but I'm glad she did, sir" the anger slowly fading from the Capt's face with her last words. If she was lucky she wouldn't have to explain where she was for the last several hours, and she didn't the Captain walked away shortly after telling them that they were both suspended, until further notice. With nothing left to do, Ashley walked off back to the bathroom, Black followed her in. Ashley started washing or at least attempting to wash the blood off her, it wasn't until she saw Black out of the corner of her eye did she notice she had been followed.

"Why did you cover for me when you didn't have to?"

"I'm sure you would have done the same thing"

"Look it wasn't your fault, I'll talk to the Captain see if I can get back on" she didn't want to talk anymore; she focused on the task in front her. The water slowly turning a dull pink as it went down the drain.

Black left but returned ten minutes later with a pair of hospital scrubs, the best she could scrounge up, she herself was wearing a pair, the blood on her uniform only darkened it, on Ashley who was wearing a rather bright white shirt, it looked like well what it was blood.

Black put the clothes on the sink beside Ashley and left not coming back. Ashley scrubbed as hard as she could but the blood wouldn't come off, the imaginary blood any way, her hands had already been clean for some time now, but every time she looked she saw, the crimson blood dripping off them, and she had to wash them off again.

If the Captain was here, he would kill two birds with one stone, he would go in search of Cruz to see why she had taken so many days off without notice, the accident had already riled the Capt.'s blood pressure sky high, and knowing Cruz she would spike it up to the point where he had a heart attack and she got fired on the spot before he collapsed. That would be a sight to see, but a deadly one.

It wasn't that late, and visiting hours were over for another hour, so she made her way up to Hayden's room, he was alone picking aimlessly at his food.

"Where's Cruz?" she asked, she had to warn her to lay low, meaning she couldn't be with Hayden right now.

"Getting her supper" her stomach growled, smelling his food made her mouth water, reminding her that she hadn't eaten all day. She sat in Cruz's chair waiting while he ate, which in this case was only the pudding. Chocolate at that, he ate half and put it down saying it tasted like chalk.

"Why are you wearing hospital scrubs, you become a doctor without telling me?" she wished that were the case

"There was an accident, Bosco got hurt pretty bad, my clothes are in the trash full of blood"

"Can I ask what Bosco was doing with you, I thought you worked in Anti-Crime with Cruz"

"I did, I mean I do, he got in the car and refused to leave saying something about we needed to talk, then I didn't so I motioned his partner in the car too and off we went" she kept eying his tray, her stomach growled again louder this time.

"To where?"

"Where the accident happened. I needed to look at something" he finally pushed the tray away giving up on eating hospital food.

Both remained silent for a while both lost deep in thought before Hayden finally spoke

"You care about him don't you?"

"Ya I do"

"I think you should know something" know what that Hayden loved her, she already knew that, he looked around before motioning her closer to the bed, she stood up and leaned in close.

"Faith isn't dead" her blood ran cold, yes Faith was dead, she saw it with her own two eyes the pole in her stomach, the blood, no the drugs were making him talk crazy.

"It was a cover-up, she needs to remain dead until people are caught" what people, this was more than the drugs talking, did he go out to the roof and smoke a little wacky tabacky?

"I can't tell you who needs to be caught, but they will be caught today" she was sure of it, wacky tabacky, if Faith wasn't dead how come all the other ones were, he must of read her mind

"The other's all were going into the witness protection program, the accident was staged" and she was George Bush. He didn't say anymore so she assumed he was done and sat back down, he motioned her forward so up she got again

"You started to uncover things, the car was meant for you"

"They wanted to kill me!" she said in a raised whisper

"Shh" he looked around again

"Not anymore, they discovered you knew nothing"

"Who's they?"

"I cant tell you that"

"Ok then, can I have your pudding?" he slid the container forward, she helped herself, devouring it within seconds.

"Hungry?" Hayden watched in amazement

"A little bit" the smell of the room suddenly making her nauseous, the smell was strong, she could smell the antiseptic they used to sanitize the room.

She sat the container of empty pudding and spoon back on his tray, still eying the brown glob that was in the center, the steamed vegetables. _Stop it, it's hospital food, _she told her self but another little voice came on _But it's food and you are hungry _she kept her eyes of the tray and focused on Hayden. Where the hell was Cruz? With any luck the Captain had cornered her, looked good on her, leaving everything for some one else to do.

She couldn't help herself, she looked at the food again, and then looked at Hayden to see if he had noticed, he had. Busted.

"Do you want my food too?"

"Only if you don't want it"

"It's all yours" that too was soon devoured

She had just shoved the last piece of broccoli in her mouth when Cruz walked in carrying a cop of coffee, she could smell it all the way over here.

Cruz hadn't seen her yet as she came in

"Sorry I took so long the Cap" she discovered Ashley scrubs and all "tain cornered me"

Ashley stood up, glancing at Hayden, who was silently asking her not to go, trouble in paradise? Could it be that Hayden was sick of Cruz or plain old just didn't like her? A part of her wanted to stay and find out, but a part of her didn't.

"I better go see if theirs an update"

"Keep me posted will ya?"

"Count on it" she left without a backwards glance.

* * *

Relatively good news was had, Bosco was in recovery heavily sedated, the bad news was he suffered from a cracked skull, internal bleeding which they were able to stop thank god and would be waking up momentarily. She recognized a most of the people there, but a few were new, she saw a woman with reddish hair and one glance told her that it was her mother, the one she refused to meet because she didn't want it to be a relationship. Then where the hell were they now? In a full pledged relationship, one that no one knew about and that's how it was going to stay.

A nurse came over to his mother and they talked before Rose shook her head no, then the nurse moved on to someone from days, they nodded and pointed at her, the nurse nodded and walked directly in front of her.

"Miss Ryans I presume?"

"Yes"

"Mr. Boscorelli is awake and asking for you, and we have your test results" the test results she had no idea why they were taken, all she felt was light headed when she was brought in nothing too serious, the nurse handed her an envelope with her name on it. She half expected for the nurse to tell her then and their, she certainly was having a hard time containing her joy as she lead Ashley to Bosco's room.

At least he didn't have a machine breathing for him, but he his head was heavily bandaged but that didn't stop him from arguing with the nurse about how capable he was of moving himself. Even when he's injured he refuses help.

"Hey gorgeous" he automatically stopped fighting with the nurse and looked at her, big grin on his face, the two nurses left quickly, and partly shut the door behind them.

"Hey yourself" she took a seat by him, he seemed giddy, once she had sat down he grabbed her hand, locking it with his.

"So what's the news?" about his injuries, wasn't the first thing they told you was how serious your injuries were?

"About your injuries?" she didn't have a clue what he was talking about

"No silly, did you get canned?" this wasn't the anything like the Bosco she knew.

"No only suspended"

"I think I'm going to too"

"What makes you say that?"

"I just have a feeling. Now shut up and kiss me" she didn't want to not when at any given moment anyone could walk in and see them, but she obliged and kissed him, the little devil had his tongue in her mouth exploring her mouth, while he was supposed to be resting. Men always to macho to listen.

"See wasn't that worth it?" he asked

_considering that you got me all hot and bothered, I say it was well worth it_ she nodded not about to voice her thoughts.

"Why don't you get some rest?" she wanted to look at the test results but wasn't about to when she was in the presence of somebody. He was about to protest but yawned

"Only if you stay with me"

"I'm not going any where"

* * *

A/N: Did you catch my other hints, cant really say much more with out it coming out what it is. The build up of what show the cross over is, is in next chapter. 


	26. Are You Ready?

A/N: These Flashback are important I promise!

* * *

_Her grandmother's house had always been a place where Ashley and Rachael could go to get away from everything, Ashley had told her grandmother many times that their parents were druggies, and drunks but her grandmother would always laugh it off, and continue on with her cross-stitching. Today was no different her grandmother had just told her to keep her mouth shut, a man never liked a woman who told fibs._

_Her grandmother was also a religious person and often reminded Ashley of the Ten Commandments especially about the ones about honoring thy mother and father, and after the ten commandments came various verses from the bible. And you mustn't forget the little warning her grand mother gave her every time she saw her, be careful what you do, you could end up in hell with you grandfather. Then also her grandmother would go back to her crossing stitching humming a hymn from her Sunday church service. _

_Her grandmother had her friends, who of course came from old money, their husbands long since passed away, leaving their fortune to their oldest sons who in turn took care of their mother's giving them diamonds for birthday's and cars for Christmas. Weekend getaways whenever they chose. _

_Grandmother's one sin was that she liked to gossip, and would always tell her friends to kindly keep their mouths shut when the topic of her son was raised, and then remind them of their family's discretions. _

_Today was different though, anyone could sense it, their was more electricity in the air and almost crackled when you moved. Everyone looked like they had something to hide. _

_Even her grandmother, but what was anyone's guess. If her friends knew, they weren't budging. _

_Grandmother had just asked her if she would like to stay for supper and she had happily agreed. Staying away from home wasn't a chore anymore it was a necessity, a necessity to stay alive. Rachael had seemed more distant and silent than usual, always ranting on about her day at school and who had looked at her or talked to her. She hadn't said a word since she arrived an hour ago she just sat and did her homework, she also sported a black eye, trying to resist daddy dearest again no doubt. _

_A door slammed immediately sending warning to the occupants something was about to happen, they knew who the slammer was, daddy had come to collect them, make them go home, her grandmother would pull her father aside and tell him in secret that Ashley had told her stories about him again, and she'd get backhanded for it, or beaten where no one could tell, beneath the clothing. After the last visit from the social worker, he had moved on to places where clothing would hide, and repeated over and over again no one was going to take them from him. _

_Ashley tried getting out of the room, by saying she had to use the rest room but daddy opened the door before she could. He gripped her hard around her arm, above her shirt hem so no one would know he left a mark, the pain was just a dull numbing sense anymore, she tried so hard to block out the pain, like she usually did but this time was different he kept squeezing until he heard a crack and pain shot up her arm. She knew instantly her arm was broken, it was how she was going to get to the hospital without him noticing was the better question. She would have to sneak out later tonight and make up some half-ass lie about why her arm was broken and why their were fingers marks around the place of breaking. Now her father would take Rachael home and have his way with her, the look in her grandmothers eyes told her that she knew what he was going to do, she refused to think her oldest son was capable of molesting his daughter. Her father's voice was like thunder loud and booming, yelling at them both to gather their things they were going home, her grandmother told him she had invited them for supper and he had told her in a calm voice they were having company over tonight maybe another time. There never was another time, her grandmother was dead two weeks later. _

_It fueled her anger towards her father even more, never allowing her to see her grandmother one last time. She didn't have anyone left in the world but herself, Rachael had become all but invisible now, never saying more than two words at a time. _

_Her mother drove her to the hospital that night, noticing during dinner why she didn't move her right arm, her mother went on and on saying her father didn't mean it but, he had meant it and so much more. Her mother was lucky that the bruises hadn't shown up yet, they didn't have to explain, she just fell the wrong way her mother said, you know kids were kids, every time she turned her back she was getting into trouble falling off something. That worked when she was seven, not when she was fourteen. The doctor's and even the nurse tried to get her to talk about what happened when her mother was filling out the insurance forms but she knew better, she kept her mouth shut. _

"Ashley" she jumped awake, trying to gather her surroundings, everything was white, definitely not her apartment and her neck hurt like hell, and her hand was asleep and felt like a heavy object was on it. It slowly came back to where she was and she saw the object was Bosco's hand, weighing her hand down. Everything that had happened yesterday had come into her mind too, he was in here because of her. Why the hell couldn't she have waited, talked to him then? Locked her doors when she got in, a lot of what if's still left her with well all the what if's she started out with. She slowly raised her gaze to the person who had just called her name.

The medicine must be working; he sported a wide grin, ear to ear at least he had a bed to sleep in, she had to sleep in a chair, which her muscles were now protesting, her neck the most, she had one hell of a creek in the neck.

"Come here" she stood up and sat down in the little space that was left. His fingers slowly working out the kinks in her neck, feather light touches made her shiver. His warm breath chilled her to the bone. The urge to pee hit her all at once and she jumped up in fear that she might pee her pants if she didn't find a bathroom soon. She grabbed her coat and left with a quick explanation. She was washing her hands when lightly bumped the sides of her breast and it hurt, she finished washing, dried, and looked in the other stalls to see if anyone else was with her, the bathroom was hers at the moment. She touched her right breast and was surprised to find that it hurt and her boobs were swollen. Okay, this was new. She pulled the scrub shirt tighter around her, trying to see if anything was wrong, nothing. Mmm.. that's what you get for sleeping in a chair.

(A/N: If you haven't guessed it yet, then theirs not hope for you. Just read on if ur lazy and don't feel like getting it or just plain don't get it.)

She checked her appearance, nothing she could do about that at the moment, she'd go find some gift shop or something to get toothpaste and a toothbrush. She was going to drop her coat back off in Bosco's room so she started searching for her wallet. She started searching pockets, when paper connected with her hands, she pulled it out, the test results the nurse had been so damn happy about. Ahh she found her wallet, at last food! The paper kept nagging her by its presence and finally she had enough, it was still early few patients were up and the nurses were enjoying their morning coffee, she didn't have to worry about anyone coming in and interrupting her, she put her coat back on one of the sinks beside her as she ripped open the envelope.

Her eyes scanned over all the tests that they had done with her blood, their was a lot. All because she had complained about the smell of latex from the gloves the nurse was literally shoving in her face.

'Hepatitis B – negative, Hepatitis C – negative, HIV – negative' everything had negative except for one thing,

"Pregnancy – POSITIVE!" what the fucking hell she was pregnant? She kicked the garbage can

"Mother Fu" she stopped the door opened, in came a nurse. She grabbed her coat and left, shoving the results in her pocket, pregnant of all fucking things to do, she went and got her self pregnant! Well their was only option of who the father was, Bosco. She would have started to gain weight by now if it were Hayden's that was over three months ago.

She pulled out the paper again, the cursed paper, the one which brought her life to a crashing halt, she scanned over it again thinking she misread and something else was positive. No pregnancy was the only positive and the star thingy beside it said app. 4 weeks. There was no doubt about it, it was Bosco's. The hard part was telling him, and taking in his reaction, how would he react? Just when she thought she had him figured out he went and reacted completely different than she would have thought. Well the best thing she could do was tell him. And go from there but not until she had brushed her teeth and eaten, she wasn't about to eat hospital food again.

She was in luck, the gift shop was open but their was a catch, the person behind the counter wouldn't shut her yap and talked the whole time she was in there going on about stupid things that you wouldn't normally talk about. She did the next best thing and tuned her out, pretending she was lost in thought looking for something. She had found everything, even a box of crackers to boot.

Her mouth minty-fresh she made her way back to Bosco's room, he'd been lucky and no one else was sharing the room with him, she was just about to walk in when voices stopped her.

"If you had died I don't know what I would have done" their was silence and Ashley stepped forward to see what had happened, before her vision turned red she saw Cruz kissing Bosco and he wasn't exactly pushing her away. The kiss ended and Ashley stepped back out of the room, careful not to make a noise. She heard Bosco's deep voice

"Why now? After all this time, why now?"

Silence filled the room again, she heard movement and back up as fast as she could towards the end of the hall, she wasn't about to get caught eavesdropping. Cruz didn't see her as she walked out of the room, she wanted nothing more to attack the woman from behind her and curse and scream at her, making her pay for what she did. She had someone else to think about now; her hand went protectively to her stomach. She would pay. She didn't exactly want to go in and accuse him of anything, Cruz was a bitch, with a capital B but still he hadn't exactly pushed away or stopped it when it was about to happen either. They were both at fault. For now she would pretend nothing happened see how long it would take for him to tell her, if he did at all.

She put on the best face she could as she went back into the room, pretending everything was fine and she hadn't just witnessed a private moment between him and his ex. She sat herself down, debating whether or not to make him feel guilty about telling him she was pregnant, maybe that would be all the encouragement he needed to tell her. She'd play it by ear.

Half an hour had past and he wouldn't shut up, she was half done her box of crackers, cheese flavoured, they're damn addictive. Like Lay's chips, betcha you eat one – to this day she still hadn't won that bet. While listening to him drone on and on she had made up a mental list of things to do to both Bosco and Cruz or one or the other, so far she was on one hundred. Mostly were to Cruz but the ones with Bosco involved his testicles being electrocuted or cut off.

_101. Accidentally shoot her and say your gun went of accidentally. That could be a keeper friendly gun fire._

"Do you agree?" her eyes flew up to him, what was she agreeing to?

"Ya" and he continued on, having no clue that she had no idea it had been a guess to agree

_102. Slowly poison her with arsenic in her coffee. Who had time for that? And where was she supposed to get arsenic with out raising red flags? No that took to long._

_103. Cut the brakes to her car. No that wouldn't work cause a) she wasn't about to get dirty, and b) she didn't know where the brake line was on a car._

_104. Run her over with a car, then blow up the car. That could work, but there was always a paper trail, so no that couldn't work either._

Her cracker box now empty, she threw it in the garbage all those made her thirsty, she interrupted him mid-sentence.

"I'm thirsty want anything?" she got up, never looking at him, she crossed her arms in fear that she would strangle him or at least attempt to hurt him.

"No"

"I'll be back. I'll see if your mother's still out there too, she was talking with the Capt last time I checked and that was six hours ago" her anger running to an all time high.

_105. Wipe the smile off his face with a nearby pillow. Naw, too risky she could be caught._

Then it hit her, if he wanted to hurt her, she'd give him pain, she'd leave, and not just the hospital, the town, the state even. A friend owed her a favour. When she left this room she wasn't coming back.

Maybe in a couple of years she'd call, and say oh ya by the way you're a father. It wasn't fair to him or her unborn child but that's the way it was going to be, she'd take care of everything today. She'd keep her apartment and everything in it, in case she needed it, if she ever came back. She'd have the bills to be automatically withdrawn every month. Maybe even rent it out. No she didn't want people touching her things. So much to do, so little time. She had to quit her job too. First she had to find something out first.

"Bosco, how much do you love me?" she smiled mischievously

"With everything in me why?" something was up he knew it

"I think we should end things" she said in a cold emotionless voice, turned and left.

_106. Rip out his heart and stomp on it.

* * *

_

A/N: Ok so does everyone now get what's up with Ashley? I know she's becoming a bitch but she'll be nicer, and I know this was supposed to be the chapter you found out where she was going but next one I swear even start her in the new place. I think either next chapter or the one after that will be the last, but don't worry a sequel is in the works.

If anyone can guess where Ashley is going I'll dedicate the final chapter to them! I know that may not be a big thing, but I think it is, I would feel special if someone did that for me.


	27. Where Will You Go?

A/N: Just wanted to let everyone know that there is a sequel coming up, it may be posted in the a different category cause of the crossover, (see how I didn't tell you, cause If I tell you now then you don't have to read on) maybe not cause it will still have Bosco in it, maybe at the beginning so I can post it in the Third Watch section and Bosco will make appearances throughout the chapters too, to bad their wasn't a category that wasn't for Crossover's.

Songs are in **_bolded italics;_** the letter is in _italics, _so are thoughts just so you don't get confused. Only one letter though. More songs in this cause they get out what I wanna say in a short time, where it would take me forever to explain it. Locations and times are in **bold and underlined. **

Since no one had any guess's about what the cross over was going to be, I'm dedicating this chapter to all those who reviewed. Look for sequel coming up soon in the Third Watch section!

Song's used were Everybody's Fool by Evanescence, Throw It All Away by Default, and Harder to Breathe by Maroon 5, (where Ashley sang)

* * *

**½ hour ago**

"Bosco, how much do you love me?" she smiled mischievously

"With everything in me why?" something was up he knew it

"I think we should end things" she said in a cold emotionless voice, turned and left.

**Present**

When he thought he knew something was up he didn't expect this, why out of the blue would she just go and break what they had between them, they'd only just gotten together, really together, emotionally.

_I think we should end things._

He sat in shock for he didn't know how long, the news never really setting in.

_I think we should end things._

The words kept playing over and over in his mind, didn't he have a say in this? It took two to tango. Maybe if he was lucky he could catch up with her, he started to rise from the bed as the nurse came in and forced him back down into the bed, saying he was still a few more days before he could go home.

"I'm going home"

"No you're not"

"I'll sign myself out AMA" (Against Medical Advice)

"No you will lay back down and get some rest"

The nurse started fluffing his pillows, like that really was going to get him to calm down. The best thing that had ever happened to him had walked out that door, and he couldn't stop her. There was a chance she could still be in the hospital, if she was she wasn't leaving until she heard him out. He'd beg if he had to. She wasn't getting away this easily. He'd make his escape once, the nurse left.

**20 minutes ago. **

Ashley knocked on Hayden's door, and walked in, the anger that Ashley thought she had pushed down started to resurface, as she saw Cruz acting like nothing ever happened only moments ago.

"I need to speak with Hayden" she paused "Alone" she tried to keep her anger from reaching her eyes, she didn't know how well that was working without a mirror. Cruz slowly got up putting her magazine down in the chair she just vacated. She looked at Hayden, seeing if he would say it was ok for her to stay, he didn't. She walked by Ashley and she heard her mumble something like 'Whore' but wasn't going to start anything right now.

"Close the door on your way out" Ashley's voice came out ice cold.

**Hallway**

Ashley knew, she hadn't seen her when she came out of his room, but she had been there, she was sure of it. She'd messed up Big time.

She wanted to go tell Bosco, that Ashley knew but maybe he had told her, she wanted what they had, Hayden was only putting up with her because he was too kind to tell her to get the hell out. But if she went to Bosco now, he would 1.) Yell at her or 2.) Never speak to her. Her gut was leaning towards the second choice.

**Back in Hayden's room**

Ashley walked around his bed to sit in the chair that Cruz had been sitting on, the magazine opened to certain page, one she had been reading no doubt. With one swoosh of Ashley's hand the magazine went flying, onto the floor and under the bed, closing. Now if only she could do that to Cruz's head she would be happy.

"What's up?"

"I'm leaving town and I think it may be for good" Hayden's mouth opened but firmly closed. He opened his mouth again and this time spoke

"I thought you and Bosco were getting along good"

"We were until Vampira came along" he wanted to laugh but thought better of it, hearing it in the tone she said the name.

"Vampira wouldn't be Cruz would it?"

"How'd you guess?" she answered sarcastically

"Well you calling her a whore as she walked past, helped me" she hadn't meant to speak that loud. Whoops.

"So I'll uh, call you once I get my new phone, just don't change yours on me" she smiled

"I'm not going any where" he smiled "Well hopefully I'll get out of this place but you know what I mean"

"Ya I do"

"Why the sudden change?"

"Just need to get out of here I guess" she shrugged her shoulders. He sensed there was more to it than that but he knew better than to pry

"If Bosco asks where I am you wont tell him will you?" he looked at her, really looked at her, her eyes pleading with him, not to tell her secrets.

"He won't hear it from me" if he ever wanted a chance with her again he'd keep her secrets.

"Can you keep another one?" her voice quiet, she was debating whether or not to tell him, he could almost see the tally inside her head Tell Him, Don't Tell Him, the Tell him outweighed Don't Tell Him.

"I'm pregnant" he eyes opened wide, it could be his, if it was he wasn't about to let her walk away. Seeing his reaction she quickly added

"It's Bosco's" relief washed over him

"Well I better get going" she stood

He opened his arms

"Can I at least have a hug before you go.. maybe even a kiss?" he asked like an innocent schoolboy.

"What the hell, I'll give you both" she kissed him first then a hug; the hug was a little longer than customary. He would never see her again so he held on just a bit longer.

"Send me pictures ok?" he knew the kid would be as gorgeous as it's mother maybe even more

"Sure thing" she let go of him and pulled back and walked to the door. She reached for the handle as his voice stopped her

"One last question, where you going?" She plastered on a big grin

"Vegas"

(A/N: There you have it)

* * *

Things seemed different as she walked into the precinct for what may be the last time, she was on suspension so no one figured she would come in so the shocked faces of fellow cops weren't as surprising as she thought they would be. She was here to tell everyone that she quit and here to clean out her locker. Soon enough it would be someone else's and she would be just a forgotten memory. 

They took the news pretty well, and wished her good luck, now all that was left to do was clean out her locker, which didn't take long, and she shut it for the final time. She was going to miss this place, so many things happened here some she wanted to forget, others she didn't.

She breathed in the stale odour of sweat, B.O, and cologne, never had it once had it spelt like perfume, even the air freshener that was put in there, was flowers and that soon was covered by the smell of the typical male. She walked all around spraying the body mist that had been in her locker, this stuff didn't go away for a while, it was her present to the locker room, to smell nice for a little while.

"Are you here?" someone said behind her, the desk Sgt had a cordless phone in his hand over the microphone, since when have they gotten a cordless phone?

"Ya" she said cautiously, he put the phone back up to speaking level

"Ya she's here. You wanna talk to her? Ok" he hands her the phone, she mouths 'Who is it?' but the desk Sgt had already walked away

"Hello?"

"Ashley don't move, I'm comi-" she hung up the phone, she was not going to talk to him right now. She had to get out before Bosco came. She dropped the phone off, but something made her stop and turn around facing the stairs. Cruz was coming down a song she hadn't heard in a long time popped into her head and yet it fit.

**_Look here she comes now_**  
_**Bow down and stare in wonder  
**__**Oh how we love you  
**__**No flaws when you're pretending  
**__**But now I know she  
**__**Never was and never will be  
**__**You don't know how you've betrayed me  
**__**And somehow you've got everybody fooled**_

She laughed to herself and walked away. Happy that she would never see her again. But seeing her that one last time brought back memories of the earlier today that all she wanted to was push away.

_**Why can't I drive this image from my mind?  
**__**It's true that you pushed me to the point  
**__**I think I've taken all I'm gonna take  
**__**This really starts to sting  
**__**The bullshit and the baggage that you bring  
**__**I'm gonna throw it all away  
**__**Throw it all away**_

She sat in her car, trying to find the nerve to start the car, something that would start the rest of her life. From where she parked she saw Bosco rush into the precinct, unaware of how close she was, she also watched him rush back out, that's all she could take she started her car and drove off, at the last moment Bosco noticed it was her, damn red light, she quickly pulled into the right lane so she could turn. It worked and he quickly faded from sight.

She didn't notice the tears until she had to wipe them away, blurring her vision so she couldn't see.

She could have flown to Vegas but this way she could see the sights as she went, seeing what every state that she passed through had to offer. It would take her just over a day and half that is if she didn't stop and traffic was good. She'd stop when she got tired or hungry. Her cell phone rang constantly so she cranked her music up to drown it out. She could take the easy way and shut it off but the music put her into a zone and she wasn't about to stop that.

Somehow singing at the top of her lungs with no one around for miles seemed to melt the anger away which, brought on even more anger because she wasn't really angry that Cruz had kissed Bosco, she was angry because she wasn't. A new song came one, every song that had come on had been a favourite of hers. She lowered her voice, cars were starting to pass her telling her that she would be soon in Vegas, but she continue to belt out the song

"How dare you say my behavior's unacceptable, so condescending unnecessarily critical"

"I have the tendency of getting very physical, so watch your step cause if I do you'll need a miracle"

"You drain me dry and make me wonder why I'm even here, double vision I'm seeing finally clear, you want to stay but you know very well I want you gone, not fit to funkin tread the ground that I'm walking on"

She reached it, the outskirts of Vegas the view amazing, as always. Better call her friend and tell them she was here. She expected the number of missed phone calls to be high but not 76. She racked her brain to remember her friend's number, and punched it in, hopefully this would be the one. He answered on the second ring. (A/N: Thought it was a girl didn't you?)

"Sanders"

"Guess who Spiky"

"Ashley?"

"Who else would call you Spiky?"

"I don't know" he said in a voice that didn't sound like the upbeat Greg she knew.

"You sound pissed off anything wrong?"

"Trouble with a case"

"Since when did you start working cases? You were the DNA lab punk"

"Lab Punk? I started awhile ago"

"Good for you doing something you wanted to. Anyway I can help?"

"The only way you can help is if your five minutes from the lab. Which I know you aren't"

"No I'm about ten"

"What?"

"I'm in Las Vegas Greg"

"Then you can pick up lots of lemons"

"Where am I supposed to get lemons at three o'clock in the morning?"

"There's a supermarket open 24hrs, two blocks from the lab"

"How many?" she pulled off into the supermarket parking lot, the lot basically empty a stray car here and there, from the employees.

"2 dozen should do it" she walked into the supermarket and was blasted by cold air, any other time she would have welcomed the cool air but today it sent shivers down her spine, something that didn't have very often.

The cashier looked at her weird when she put four bags of lemons on the conveyor belt, who was she to judge she was working in a supermarket at 3 in the morning. She paid and left without a word to the crabby cashier._ If it were 3 in Vegas, then it would be about 6 in New York_ where had that thought come from? She still didn't have answer when she pulled up in front of the lab and pulled the lemons from the passenger seat.

Greg had his back turned towards her, propping up against the reception desk talking to a fairly tall, brunette, the woman suddenly walked away, when Ashley walked up to Greg.

"Did you really believe me?" Ashley said to Greg's back, he jumped, and turned a smirk that was threatening to turn into a smile donned his face. A faint odor of rotting flesh hit her. The smell was really strong.

"Not really I was going to waittwenty then leaving to go get them myself"

**Back in New York**

Bosco didn't know how long he would have before the hospital knew he was gone. The traffic was slowly picking up as the cab pulled in front of Ashley's apartment, she had to be there, Hayden had been no help, wouldn't even tell him where she was going after she had visited him, maybe he didn't know, he didn't believe that. Hayden knew, but wasn't telling.

He half fell into the entrance way of the apartment, he was leaning against the door, regretting he hadn't taken any medication before he left, but the med's made him drowsy and he needed a clear head for what he was about to do. He'd even propose if he had to make her understand that he wanted her and only her.

The apartment was void of any of her personal possessions, no clothes in the closet, or dressers, the bathroom held only his stuff, the towels were half gone, and only his dirty laundry was left. He went into the kitchen to have a beer, the pain becoming unreal. He reached in and popped the lid off; walking by the little table in the kitchen, something white caught his eye. He snatched up the letter and had to read it three times before he finally understood it said.

"_Bosco_

_I saw you and Cruz, IthoughtI could deal with it, butIcan't. I left so you two could be together. I wanna know something but cant face you just yet, or stand to hear your voice so I guess I'll never know but did you really mean all those things you said or was it just towaste time until you got Cruz back? _

I put the apartment in your name, stay in it, or move do what ever you want I don't care anymore. Have a nice life.

_Love Ashley"_

"_P.S. I'm pregnant and it's yours"_

He reread it a fifth and sixth time, believing each time he read it; the words would change and say she was out getting coffee and be back soon. By the tenth time he read it, the words still hadn't change and he gave up hope, she wasn't coming back.

**Las Vegas**

Greg was talking the lemons from Ashley when, a middle-aged man, came around a corner with a taller man, shaved head, only stubble remained, came walking by them, the older man stopped mid-stride.

"Excuse me" he turned to face them, this might Greg's boss, and he might be in trouble for talking with her.

"Grissom I-"

"Would you care to be in an experiment?" he was talking to Ashley not Greg, she didn't know what to say, she looked at Greg and back to his boss

"Ok"

"Follow me please" he speed off, all following the older male.

"Hey Grissom this is Ashley Ryans" Grissom only nodded, and the other guy gave her a white tooth grin. The odor she smelt on Greg was intensified; she was sandwiched between the two men who reeked. The smell almost made her gag.

Grissom lead them down a hall, turning left and right suddenly, this is making her head hurt trying to map her way out. Finally Grissom stopped in what looked like a garage, a bed already made up sheets and all.

"Nick lay down, Miss Ryan's straddle him" this wasn't exactly what she considered doing with someone she just met. Nick climbed on the bed.

"Miss Ryans is my mother. Ashley's fine, Can I ask what this experiment is for?" Grissom pondered the question for a moment before answering. She was not a threat to the case.

"The victim was found in his bed, face up with an…erection, the blood spatter is missing from a large chunk of the bed, vaginal fluids were found but no woman, so we calculated the woman to be about your size. Now if you will" he motioned her to the bed. She climbed on top. She'd bet there wasn't an ounce of fat on him. He was smooth and hard. Her hands on his stomach told her he had a flat stomach and mental pictures of him without his clothes on flashed through her mind. Something she shouldn't be thinking.

"Join hands" she looked at Grissom, a small crowd had gathered, the brown-haired girl had shown up, and an older reddish-blond woman, and a black man. Sara, Catherine and Warrick, she assumed from what Greg had told her. She joined hands with Nick, they were strong hands. But she guessed that they could turn gentle within seconds maybe something she would like to find out. _No, your thinking for two now. _

"Ok Warrick, come in through the door" he walked until he was a couple of feet away at the end of the bed.

"Now if I just found these two, him with my girl"

"Nick tell us when you can see Warrick, Ashley your going to have to start riding him" Greg choked on his breath, Sara hid a smile while Catherine looked down at the ground. Nick flashed a smile at Ashley and Warrick coughed. Ashley obliged and starting 'riding him like a cowboy' it was hard to keep the smile away, but somehow she managed.

Warrick came to the end of the bed.

"I can see him now" Nick told Grissom

"There's were no defense wounds. Nick try to defend yourself. Ashley don't let go"

Nick and Ashley struggled but Ashley wouldn't let go.

"She held him down" Sara stated what everyone else was thinking.

"I think fast and grab the closest heavy thing," he picks up the bat near the bed. Warrick raises it above his head and brings it down enough, just above his head. Ashley rolls of Nick to the bed beside him.

"Don't move" Ashley froze, Grissom came over and traced Ashley's position.

"Okay you can move now" she climbs off the bed, trying to breath in clean air but the smell seemed to move along with her. She probably smelled like rotten flesh now. Catherine, Sara and Warrick left talking, Greg and Grissom left too, in a heavy discussion leaving her with Nick.

_Your just horny, if given the chance you would even find Grissom sexy _she told herself. The smile seemed to be an everyday thing with him so she didn't read much into it. He took a step forward.

"Shift's almost done do you wanna grab some breakfast after this?" his voice could bring any woman to her knees. She wasn't buying it, but she played along, and took a step closer to him.

"You don't waste much time do you?" he stepped closer so they were a foot apart.

"I go after what I want" she took a step closer as she spoke

"Oh really?" she couldnt help but smile flirtatiously

"Life's too short not to" his eyes glazed over, telling her that he was speaking from experience.

"I have to tell you something" he steps closer still, he looms over her, the smell making her sick.

"And what's that?" his voice came out slow and husky, mixed with his accent, he should come with a warning label. Warning will seriously make you go crazy and then leave. He was a cowboy without a doubt.

She looked up her warm breath fanning his face. Their lips almost touching

"You smell really bad" she moved away completely and out the door. He groaned this definitely not going to be easy.


End file.
